Telephone privacy

avatar for gawker
gawker
Older than dirt
Last week I brought my ATF to a facility for drug detox. I stopped at a convenience store so she could get quarters for the pay phone inside the place. She was gone about 6 or 7 minutes and when she returned she had just shot up a gram of heroin. On top of several Xanax she had taken she was pretty well blasted. I waited as she went through the intake process and she came back, handed me her pocketbook and her cell phone and asked me to hang on to them.
Yesterday I picked her up after a 5 day stint. When she checked out her personal belongings were given to her and she asked where her phone & bag were. I said I had them in my car. She told me that she had no recollection of checking in and was amazed that I had them.
Now, I had her phone for five days. Should I have checked out her photos, her messages, her other friends? Of course I did. For more than 6 months she has said I'm her only OTC customer and from what I could tell, that's the case.
Her messages with her BF/baby daddy were quite explicit but supported what she told me: he won't see her till she's been clean for 2 weeks. There was a message from a new customer who she's only seen in the club and she says he's BF material - hot, ripped body, owns his own business at age 30. She doesn't view him as P4P material but says he tips very well.
Everything else was all about the constant quest for drugs. I know the first names and phone numbers of about a dozen dealers, for what that's worth.
Her photos included several totally nude selfies, which shed already sent to me. No where near the stuff I found when she left her phone in my car 5 or 6 years ago. A question for the assembled masses: should I have gone through the phone?

18 comments

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avatar for Corvus
Corvus
9 years ago
Normally I would say no, but given the circumstances and your history with this woman, I say it was OK. Although I'm sure there will be plenty of responses of "it was wrong". You have invested enough time, energy, and money on this one to earn unlimited access.

Maybe the next question should be "should I have deleted the names/numbers of her dealers?"
avatar for s88
s88
9 years ago
Aslong as you never punish her (hand her phone over to cops/DA for prosecution), or act on the information (blackmail), it would be fine. If she gets arrested, the booking cop would go through her phone anyway in jail. Dont ever text anything you wouldnt want a LEO to see.

A stripper having only one or 2 OTC customers+1 SO isn't impossible. Not all strippers are wild whores. STD risk and emotions can limit them to only handful of customers OTC. If she wanted to be on BP, she would be.
avatar for Bavarian
Bavarian
9 years ago
You're a saint, Gawker.

I hope your ATF has a special place in her heart for you. You have done so much for her and you're not even her boyfriend/husband.

avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
9 years ago
People really need to learn to lock their phones
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
9 years ago
That girl doesn't deserve you Gawker you seem like too nice of a guy.
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
9 years ago
Can you txt me the hot photos. While you're at it Juice wants them too.

Yeah - honorably speaking - you probably shouldn't have gone through the phone, but I don't think there's anyone who couldn't resist doing so. If anything it shows you she has been honest with you which is cool. I think she has a lot of respect for you when she's not wacked out on drugs.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
I wasn't going to admit this but since Gawker has I will too.

I have looked through the phone of the DS on three separate occasions. I did it because you guys kept insisting that she fucks other customers OTC, and I wanted to be sure. All of her customer
texts concerned meeting itc, and there was no express or implied reference to anything sexual.

It was wrong for both of us to look at their phones. Out strippers have a right to privacy as do we. I regret doing this and I don't think I would ever do it again.

avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
9 years ago
You are a good man Gawker. If she gave you her phone and didn't lock it - that's her stupidity - however since you went through it - and did nothing with the information - there are no worries in my view.
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
9 years ago
I can't fault you for going thru her phone. You have a long history with her and you need to know what is going on with her.

I don't think I would go thru my ATF's phone, however. I might find some things I would not like to see.
avatar for magicrat
magicrat
9 years ago
I have nowhere near the history you have with this woman Gawker, but saying that, sometimes we're better off not knowing.
avatar for magicrat
magicrat
9 years ago
I meant with any woman...didn't mean to imply that I know gawker's ATF
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
I would rather not have seen some of the things that I saw in the phone of the DS. She may not be fucking any other paying customers, but there was plenty of other evidence of stripper drama and poor choices.
avatar for JuiceBox69
JuiceBox69
9 years ago
Be funny if you found out she was talking to me lol
avatar for dallas702
dallas702
9 years ago
You are helping an addict. Of course you should be going through her stuff. Addicts learn to lie about almost everything, mostly to get access to drugs. Anyone trying to help an addict should search everything that addict uses. I hope you also searched her bag for drugs.
avatar for mrrock
mrrock
9 years ago
Yes technically it was wrong but I think most of us in the same position would have probably looked too out of the curiosity factor.
avatar for Imamutt
Imamutt
9 years ago
My ATF leaves her phone and pocket book in my custody on a regular basis. I have never even had the slightest temptation to look. She obviously trusts me, that's all I need to know.
avatar for deogol
deogol
9 years ago
Every case is different of if you should be looking.

I would have written down the names and phone numbers of the dealers and sent that along to the narcotics division. Get a detectives name.
avatar for Vegasbob
Vegasbob
9 years ago
Dude... Run. Hope you've been wrapping that shit. As far as the phone goes. Don't think it really matters. I'm sure she assumes you did go thru it
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