My friend who was new to clubs went to one I told him about. Well he bought a nude dance and got too excited and she stopped him told him the rules. He apologized and gave her a proper tip. But she did finish her dance for him opposed to ejecting him from the club.
He wants to go back for sure but same time he sincerely feels terrible for risking her job.
If he tipped her apologized and she was not mad. He still has a shot. Seriously, unless he was asked not to come back and was a gentleman after words he is okay. Now he knows where the line is.
Or rather, now he knows where the line is with THAT particular girl...
Really, I don't see how anyone can make any kind of informed comment without knowing more ... what exactly did he do, what city, what club? Then we could at least look up some club reviews to see what kind of place it is. I have no idea whether to tell you to give your friend a lecture about the importance of consent, or tell you that a predatory stripper was just taking advantage of an obvious newb, or anything in between
Here's what he told me, he was chatting with a dancer and he bought a lap dance in the privet room. She was grinding on him and he licked her above her pussy she stopped him right there. I don't know the towns name or club because time I wrote this I had just returned from a bar crawl. We're in South Idaho.
He fingered her in the pussy for 10 minutes and then she said, "you can't do you bad boy", with a grin on her face. Then he looked sad and tipped her. His finger was hard the whole time. Now he's worried his finger will not have the same good ol time.
Plot. Thickens, after.the lap dance several other dancers just ran up and started cozying up. He bought one a drink and got another dance in by another. He left the club and went drinking after that and made it back to the hotel suprisingly.
A couple of things:
- You never know if you "broke a club rule" just because one stripper says so. He might have broken a club rule, or he might have just pushed her personal limits, and it's standard stripper procedure to blame the club or bouncers so that he doesn't hold it against her.
- Regardless, personal-style wise, putting my tongue on her -- especially when it's close to her pussy, which she is right to assume is the ultimate target -- is something I seek consent for. What with the body fluid exchange and all, it's one of those things where I just feel she deserves a say ... and if she says no, I'm free to move on to the next girl, but I'm not going to just start licking her (and especially, not just start licking her genitals)
^^^ANyway, the bottom line for me is: he should not feel bad for getting "too excited" (that's what I want my stripper to do!), he should not feel bad for wanting to lick her pussy, and he should not feel bad for actually licking her pussy. He should feel bad for not asking first, and then complying with her wishes (or negotiating, if it's a matter of price)
Unless the dancer is hot and her lap dance skills are amazing your friend should forget her and move on to the next dancer. Most likely the only rules broken were that dancer's rules. From the sound of things she isn't that good of a dancer, or very inexperienced.
Dancer's are used to handling drunken customers who get a bit too turned on by her dancing. Good ones will just say something short, like sorry can't do that and go on like nothing else happened. If she stops a guy to tell him all the rules then she ain't worth it. Next.
-->"Unless the dancer is hot and her lap dance skills are amazing your friend should forget her and move on to the next dancer. Most likely the only rules broken were that dancer's rules."
Strongly agree... Is he now not going to the strip club for his own enjoyment, and instead just going to prove what a good guy he is? He overstepped, but there's a decent chance it's her rules, not the clubs... and in any case, she no longer trusts him and is not going to give him much leeway for anything. Makes no sense at all to go back to the club to tip her heavily to not get the experience he wants. Move on, start fresh, build trust and do a better job seeking consent, and do not settle for less than the experience you're looking for .... that's the advice I'd be giving him
Same here, tell needle dick that either he goes back to that dancer and rebuild some trust or else move on work on his consent skills. I rememeber a friend of mine getting a sexual battery charge.
Strippers could get fired for having sex in the clubs with patrons however that's if they are full on fucking in a club where its illegal. Either find one with millage and work on that consent stuff.
The boundaries of a lap-dance IMO normally just extend to her grinding and the custy groping titties and ass; anything beyond that requires consent unless it’s a known dancer that’s’ ok gong beyond that.
Anything that entails bodily fluids (e.g. custy’s tongue; kitty-play) is beyond the standard lap-dance and many dancers will take exception – having said this most dancers will often let a custy know she’s not comfortable with something a custy does but will continue to dance for the custy as long as he does not repeat the offense – so basically slipping-up once is not that big a deal and often happens in strip-clubs and dancers understand this – i.e. it’s not the unpardonable strip-club sin and it’s only unacceptable when a custy insists and continues to do things a dancer does not like.
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Hell no, I'd go back if I really wanted to.
It's a strip club. All they want is your money anyways.
If he's got money, all will be fine.
Or rather, now he knows where the line is with THAT particular girl...
Really, I don't see how anyone can make any kind of informed comment without knowing more ... what exactly did he do, what city, what club? Then we could at least look up some club reviews to see what kind of place it is. I have no idea whether to tell you to give your friend a lecture about the importance of consent, or tell you that a predatory stripper was just taking advantage of an obvious newb, or anything in between
Here's what he told me, he was chatting with a dancer and he bought a lap dance in the privet room. She was grinding on him and he licked her above her pussy she stopped him right there. I don't know the towns name or club because time I wrote this I had just returned from a bar crawl. We're in South Idaho.
- You never know if you "broke a club rule" just because one stripper says so. He might have broken a club rule, or he might have just pushed her personal limits, and it's standard stripper procedure to blame the club or bouncers so that he doesn't hold it against her.
- Regardless, personal-style wise, putting my tongue on her -- especially when it's close to her pussy, which she is right to assume is the ultimate target -- is something I seek consent for. What with the body fluid exchange and all, it's one of those things where I just feel she deserves a say ... and if she says no, I'm free to move on to the next girl, but I'm not going to just start licking her (and especially, not just start licking her genitals)
Dancer's are used to handling drunken customers who get a bit too turned on by her dancing. Good ones will just say something short, like sorry can't do that and go on like nothing else happened. If she stops a guy to tell him all the rules then she ain't worth it. Next.
Strongly agree... Is he now not going to the strip club for his own enjoyment, and instead just going to prove what a good guy he is? He overstepped, but there's a decent chance it's her rules, not the clubs... and in any case, she no longer trusts him and is not going to give him much leeway for anything. Makes no sense at all to go back to the club to tip her heavily to not get the experience he wants. Move on, start fresh, build trust and do a better job seeking consent, and do not settle for less than the experience you're looking for .... that's the advice I'd be giving him
Strippers could get fired for having sex in the clubs with patrons however that's if they are full on fucking in a club where its illegal. Either find one with millage and work on that consent stuff.
Anything that entails bodily fluids (e.g. custy’s tongue; kitty-play) is beyond the standard lap-dance and many dancers will take exception – having said this most dancers will often let a custy know she’s not comfortable with something a custy does but will continue to dance for the custy as long as he does not repeat the offense – so basically slipping-up once is not that big a deal and often happens in strip-clubs and dancers understand this – i.e. it’s not the unpardonable strip-club sin and it’s only unacceptable when a custy insists and continues to do things a dancer does not like.