On line dating

I was pretty much an online dating pro, even before Tinder turned on Easy Mode.

Okcupid was my main stomping grounds. Lot of nerdy hipster girls DTF.

You don't need a girlfriend, you need a civvy fuck buddy

Let us know how it goes

Have you tried Tinder?

Yeah I don't really want a gf, I want a civie fuck buddy. But isn't an on line dating site a reasonable place to look for that?

As for Tinder, I thought that was just for the young. I'm over 50.

I have never tried it, but my aunt did out in LA. They are both now very successful in the TV industry, have two kids, and will be celebrating their 10 year wedding anniversary soon.

Nina, don't scare me away. I'm not going to do this if it could end in marriage.

Tinder = fuckbuddy and hookups
Match or eHarmony = LTRs
POF (Plenty of Fish) = (free, like poorman's Match or eHarmony, I guess).

Why don't you freestyle and find a sugarbaby you can sponsor?

I've been online dating for a few years! My experience has been positive. My general impressions are: paysites like Match and eHarmony have more wheat to chaffe ratio. Free sites like OKCupid and PlentyofFish are cesspools, through which you'll search around to find the occasional gold nuggets.

I've met some awesome AWESOME fun women. In general, very few bad dates, the most common problem being women who are 10 years old than their pics. I do have one or two awesome internet dating gonzo date stories.

Very quickly, you'll develop a few skills:

• Lots and lots of phishing and scams and male trolls who think it's funny to pretend to be women. All of these become pretty obvious really quickly.
• Avoid women whose close-up pics are all slightly out of focus
• Avoid women who don't include clear full body shots: if those shots are all from various angles, do not bother
• Incredibly, there's a good % of women who think emailing or otherwise spending a little time to get to know the stranger on the other end is a "waste of time". Eventually, I learned to avoid them -- if they wanted to meet after just a single email exchange, both their temperament and judgement always end up suspect, which shows up quickly on the date

I already support two sugar babies who I call a DS.

And I looked at Tinder -- it sounds like a dead end for older guys.

You don't need a girlfriend - you just need to not obsess over the DS so much

Thanks subra. I've already encountered the scammers.

I've been doing it off and on for the past ten years. Overall results vary depending on whether you're living in a major city or a smaller-to-medium sized town but I've had some success. Half of my civilian fuck buddies I have met on sites such as Tagged, Plenty of Fish, Badoo, Adult Friend Finder, Tinder, and OK Cupid. Most of them will give it up for as little as a cost of a cell phone bill. The downside to that though is that some of them will develop feelings and attachment towards you after a while so not seeing one woman too frequently is key. I try not to see the same woman more than twice a month.

I found AFF to be a waste of time except to fuck the occasional milf in an open marriage.

I do think Tinder skews young, and it's all about your pics and how you look.

Guys are expected to message and women may or may not message back. When women actually do message first they are highly interested; I think I had an 100% success rate fucking girls who messaged me first if I wanted to.

It can be very superficial. But so can all of dating.

I'm not saying JS69 needs a gf, and I also am not a fan of online dating.

I do think JS69 just needs to take the time and get clean of marijuana and start to feel his feelings. Divorce means that a guy has failed. One has to deal with that.

SJG

I've done it before Match,POF,eharmony. I have never had any success with it. I basicly think it is mostly BS for most men. It is a lot like the civie world...when a woman(particularly a hot one) puts an ad online lots of guys respond. Women in these situations have many options, just like in real life. If a guy places an ad on one of these sites he gets a lot less response and a lot more competition for the women there. One of the many reasons I turned to SC's and mail order brides....LOL

Try tinder, there's younger more experimental girls on there. If you're like 18-21 you're not really going on dating websites for the most part because its not the best look for younger girls. Buuuut tinder is like known for young/fun and the scene for girls looking for hook ups/dates. And if they want an older guy they're preferences will be on that so that way you won't even see them if she doesn't like you're age

Depends on what you seek. If you are seeking sex (and by honest about it)then you'll probably have success. If not or you are seeking a specific type of person you'll probably fail. I did most of them and outside of a few decent dates (and a few friends)I got nowhere. Waste of time for me.

We're on tinder, ok cupid, mixxxer, 3ender and a few others but honestly it's a bunch of crap. All this we hear about how they are straight up hook up apps just seems to be snow job. When you pull up profile after profile and they say "not looking for hookups" or "looking for fun, sincere and interesting people" we just roll our eyes. Mixxxer seems the closest to an actual hookup app but then a lot of the profiles seem fake as hell too. When some super model "10" who is DTF looking for couples shows up as online and 1 mile away (we live in a very small town in the middle of nowhere) it just makes you go uh-huh.

Also love it when there is a time stamp on the photo that shows it was taken in 2006. If the photo is 5 or 10 years old are you saying that was your last GOOD photo you want to use?

Anongirl is right- the way you set up your preferences on tinder means that girls who don't want to meet older guys are not going to see you and you won't see them. So there's really no shame in trying it out! Also, I found out just a couple of days ago that my milf aunt is on tinder, and she's about your age. So....not just for young people ;)
Tinder is good for hookups.

Haha realized that my last sentence might seem like I'm being intentionally contradictory of seaboardrr- I actually didn't read your comment until after publishing mine ;) in my experience tinder has been good for hookups, but I'm a young single girl so probably the easiest to please demographic.

I've had a lot of luck on the main sites. POF (Plenty of fish) seemed to be the best one for me for hookups. Zoosk was good for me too. Not so much Match.

You'll get a lot of fugly girls messaging you. You just have to weed through all the emails.
When a girl that looks like a model messages you though, your Bull Shit meter should be going off.
And if they say something like "email me at an email address other than through the site." It's some sort of a scam.

You'll get a lot of fugly girls messaging you.

I think online dating is a bad deal. Best is face to face first meetings. This way you know you like her, and she knows that you like her. So no problem.

Online sets up bad stuff.

SJG

Ok I'll try Tinder and be at least half way honest about my age. And I deleted all metadata on the photos I posted, although all of mine were within the past two years.

You meet women in strip clubs, and most are quite civilianizable. You meet lots of women other places too!

SJG

I can't help you. I am not good at online flirting. I can't even make Tinder work for me.

I did POF 5 years ago, went on a couple of dates with a hot Puerto Rican chick but nothing ever happened from it. I also did other sites that didn't result in any dates it hookups. Then I committed to strip clubs. Hooked up a couple of times with chicks on cragslist after my divorce but they weren't very hot.

I thought about tinder, but I really haven't had much motivation to create an account.

Nice looking women want face to face first meetings. They want to see that they drive the guy wild.

The one's you might meet online are otherwise.

SJG

"You'll get a lot of fugly girls messaging you."

San Jose Guy, reverse that to fugly guys and you have my experience. I have seen all types of people but was stunned by the amount of fugly men out there. Quasimodo is not just a fictional character.

When I'm out of town I just go hang out at a Starbucks or a TJ Maxx and look for MILFs.

@former_stripper, what you are describing is why I don't go along with online dating, matchmaking, or letting friends do introductions. It makes for stress and a negative experience all around. Highly sexual people fuck, they don't mark the calendar and then sit waiting for dates to arrive. My ex wife always wanted to introduce people for her friends and I patently refused to be involved because it is neurotic. F2F first meeting eliminates such problems.

One thing I really laugh at is:

alleywatch.com

This Elissa Shevnisky who has written a book called "Lean Out" and who claims to be a spokes person for women in the tech sector. But the problem is that her idea of the tech sector is just bullshit, marketing and branding strategies. She is an offense to women who actually have Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics skills, and who demonstrate every day that they can do things just as well as any man can.

And then she has this:

J-Spot
youtube.com

So they tried to make this online dating thing called "Make Out Labs". But I think there wasn't must interest. So they repackaged it as Jewish Dating, J Spot.

The idea is that there are spam filters so that the women can screen out offensive responses. So I mean, just how exactly is a computer supposed to do that?

Obviously if you want to block people who bother you, then you just have to put them on ignore manually.

And then, this dating site, like all online dating stuff, is supposed to be for meeting people. But is that really what it does? No, it is for screening people out by categorizing them.

It is neurotic! The more they use that, the less the people they will fuck.

If people want to meet, do it face to face and see if the physical attraction is there, and then get to know the person, rather than trying to type cast them.

Something about Jewish culture makes Jews more likely to go for this screening out.

Listen to some of Shevinsky's stuff. She goes right up my spine.

Yes and for JS69 and to reply to Shailynn, the face to face civilian venues I like are

1. Viet Coffee ( for their waitresses )
2. 2 year and 4 year college student centers and libraries ( do carefully, have legit reason for being there )
3. Auto Parts Stores ( some have hotties at the cash register )
4. Night Clubs / Discos ( some pitched at different ages, music styles, and styles of dress )
5. Indoor Shopping Malls ( for customers and store employees, but decide and close fast, don't follow them around or out into parking lot, also rehearse what you will say to them as you must answer all their questions in the first sentence )
6. Denny's and similar for waitresses ( range from MILF to young )
7. The big chain book stores ( Friday night still 'singles night' ?)

But usually civilians do go slower than pros. One exception though is where the people are somehow pre-screened, like employment or professional venues.

Local art shows too.

And then also simply treating strip club dancers and AMP girls as civilians.

Good Luck and get sober and sane!

SJG

I just noticed that when you click on a review at the top of the page next to "Add a club" is another feature named "hook up". It will take you to a dating site called "Social sex". Seems like a weird place to place an add.

To former stripper Quasimodo had a big dick so all of the girls loved to rub his hunchback.

Twentyfive, not sure how you know Quasimodo has a big dick so I have to assume either he fucked you or you are him. A big dick isn't the most important thing to most women.

San Jose, that's exactly it. You never know how people are going to click when they meet, whether it's online or blind date. Personally I like friends first but some want that instant connection. Instant is best for sexual only relationships. The problem with online is the photo only tells part of the story.

Somebody tell me what SJG says. I tried to read it but I keep dozing off.

Some things have chamged and I kinda like on line dating. Not gonna replace my strippers of course but I wanna try some of that loose milf had a few kids pussy for a change. More room to move around. Details to follow probably.

SJG has no idea what he's tasking about. He apparently thinks hitting on Dennys waitresses gives you better odds than online dating. Oh, and apparently auto parts stores?

The whole pussy being loosened by kids things is a myth. Women do lose muscle tone as they age, so that may be what you're experiencing

I joined a few sites several years ago for free just to look. One site attempted to scam me with a lot of messages from hot girls. They wanted me to pay to read more than a sentence of the messages. I thought they were all fake but one girls message that she wanted to fuck every guy on the site that lived in south Carolina made me wonder if she was real. I got turned off by all the sites requiring a paid membership just to read messages. It smelled fishy seeing a bunch of messages from hot girls and I posted no pic and almost no info. I forget which site that was.

to former stripper- Maybe I am him, or you just don't get sarcasm either one or the other is true.

I just downloaded tinder and was going to try it but it requires a Facebook account to log in which I do not have or want. I don't want a fake Facebook or any Facebook whatsoever.

So I guess I won't be using tinder. Just have to stick to sc 's. Like sharkhunter I've found most sites to be scams. Maybe I'll try POF again. I cancelled my account years ago when I started dating a civilian. Anyone else know of any other sites where scamming is minimal?

Shadow - I noticed that too with the HOOK UP link. Only shows when you click on an sc to see their reviews.

I"ve been having a lot of fun with Match.com. Its basically just a new way to shop for women. But I'll reserve judgment until I find out how hard it is to fuck them.

JS, Match is probably way better at your age than it was for me in my 20s. I'm not saying I didn't get any dates or sex from Match, but OkCupid was way better to me.

rh48hr, try OkCupid, it's sort of a direct competitor of POF.

Former_Stripper wrote, "You never know how people are going to click when they meet, whether it's online or blind date."

Yes, that is what I mean, no match making services or match making friends. It only creates tension, and often this spins negative. Where as if the very first meeting is face to face, then it is 100% non-committal and no-expectations. And photographs are not a substitute for face to face. Photographs only create expectations.

If the people select each other in a face to face first meeting, then the tensions are eliminated from the outset.

JamesSD, hitting on Denny's waitresses and autoparts store cashiers does work. Try it. Maybe it takes a little practice, but it does work. The reason I think it works is that what every girl wants is a guy that is really attracted to her and who is not afraid to show it. She doesn't want to have to make it happen herself. If she has to do that, then the guy could be chicken of rejection. Or another girl could come on to him and get the same result.

So the girl wants the guy to pick her and make all the first moves. This applies equally well in strip clubs too. It's just that girls have learned that if they wait for that in a strip club, they will be waiting a very long time and they won't make any money. But generally if you learn to hit on Denny's waitresses and auto parts store cashiers, then you'll find that the same approaches have a huge effect when used on strippers.

Its every girls dream to have the guy hit on her, not the other way round.

In indoor shopping malls they are often startled when approached. Though they won't usually go for more than a phone number, they are deeply effected by the experience and so when you call they will be extremely ready.

That power of selecting and acting is huge. You will have the chance to use it once with a girl, and then she will never forget it. So I do not waste it by letting girls select me.

Single mothers and those over about 26yo are often extremely easy to hit on because they know that their chances are diminishing. But what I am saying does not only apply to them.

In my opinion women use match making sites because they lack confidence in their looks, or because they want to screen guys out through the questionnaires. Both of these are neurotic. Don't go there with them.

A guy has more power in just See Want Get mode, just learning how to hit on them in as many situations as possible.

With the pros you want to slow them down by increasing the intensity. But with the civvies you want to speed them up and get them out of their comfort zone.

SJG

SJG, just curious. When you are picking up all of these civilian women in bars, restaurants, etc, when in the romancing process do you tell them about your fetish for choking, strangling, and raping them in their sleep? I mean if I'm going to follow your system instead of on line dating, do I mention that stuff on our first date or should I just surprise them on our first sleepover?

Usually it can only get to really talking dirty in situations where all you can do is talk, like say in Santa Clara County's no touching strip clubs.

So often after I get them going and its already quite explicit, I'll say something like, "And sometimes I would enter you without first waking you."

That has always produced an extremely positive response.

SJG