Lamest VIP experiences

carlos_spiceyweiner
Ohio
Several weeks ago I posted a Facebook photo from a club that opened near me in Canton--The Top Shelf. For those of you who unfortunately caught a look at this cattle call before the club took it off their page, I decided to do some penance by paying the club a recent visit.

Fortunately, the one dancer there was a fairly attractive AA girl with nice tits. She did a few promising $5 bar dances so I decided to do some more penance in the VIP. Now, the club runs radio adds declaring it to be the best SC around, with lots of privacy (hint, hint). I asked her about VIP, and she walked me into their "private" area. It was simply a large open room that sat off the main bar. Then it got worse. VIP dances ($10 each) were performed at a regular table situated between the men's room and the door to the patio, which sees plenty of traffic. Oh, and the dancer explained to me that all she could do is flash her tits.

This was their idea of VIP. This is what they were advertising and were proud to offer. Have any of you seen a worse deal?

Oh, and as an extra, here's another photo of the talent the club prides itself on. (Warning: You may not be able to unsee this.)

http://s1045.photobucket.com/user/Mitche…

25 comments

Latest

PhantomGeek
9 years ago
Yeah, just a little on the scary side. Are you thinking about some sort of therapy after that visit, Carlos?
shadowcat
9 years ago
I've seen a couple of clubs that were that bad. They manage to stay in business because of the $5 dances. Some guys don't understand the difference between a good value and cheap.
JohnSmith69
9 years ago
Why do I always look even though I know that I will regret it?
carlos_spiceyweiner
9 years ago
PhantomGeek, the best therapy I could think of was hitting another club to help wash away the memory. The people running this place obviously had a few bucks to spend cleaning up this dump. They redid the main area, added a patio and dumped money into radio ads. You'd think they buy a cheap couch and put some drapes around it if they were going to sell VIPs. The one thing I did notice was just how cheap the booze was. The other customers were downing $2 beers with $2 shots, and the bartender was pretty generous with the pours.I got the feeling the people running it had never been to a club before. But hey, the cheap liquor probably makes the talent a lot more appealing.
Meursault
9 years ago
Am I reading this correctly in that you saw that photo and then went to the club? How horrible would the photo have to be to scare you off?
carlos_spiceyweiner
9 years ago
I posted another one that was even worse! To make up for it, I agreed to go review the place. Many times in NE Ohio dive bars, there is a wide range of girls--from a vomit-inducing 1 all the way up the scale. (Also, I like to look at car wrecks.)
Dancer_
9 years ago
@John, I thought exactly the same, sigh.
Some broads have no fucking shame - I don't even know how girl looking like that might even think about stripping. Damn, I wanna dance there! If whales in Ohio somehow manage to make a living dancing there, my 108lbs ass will bank(hopefully).
GoVikings
9 years ago
yeah, i haven't experienced any VIP's quite that bad, where all the dancer could do is flash her tits.

however, one lame VIP experience really sticks out in my head. one time i paid $80 for 10 minutes with one of the best looking strippers i've ever seen. not only was she hot, but she was my type. but boy was she lame at giving dances. this is why i normally don't throw down a lot of money without giving the dancer a "trial-run" or "test drive" lap dance first. but this girl was so hot that i made an exception and just went str8 to VIP with her.

her dances were so lame and she kept saying she couldn't position herself right due to the couch/way i was sitting. she didn't allow much two-way contact and her dances were very mechanical. she asked me during our dances what he could do better, but by then my mood was already ruined. i'm pretty sure this girl was a flat out ROB. she could tell how much i was into her while she was sitting with me and she really pulled the wool over my eyes.

with all that said, the vast majority of my VIP experiences have been excellent. but there's always one or two bad apples in the bunch
lopaw
9 years ago
That was pretty bad, carlos. I haven't experienced anything quite like that. I guess the worst VIP that I had was getting more air than dance. But I had made a rookie move by not test driving her first. I never saw her again after that so I suspect that she was a wash out.
Clackport
9 years ago
My worst VIP experience mirrors Lopaw's.
Papi_Chulo
9 years ago
“… got the feeling the people running it had never been to a club before …”

I get that feeling about lots of SCs – i.e. they seem to have no clue (or even care) what a strip-club goer likes. Seems lots of people owning/managing SCs are not necessarily hobbyists so they really don’t have an idea (like someone owning/managing a restaurant that is not into food).

It could also be that they may not have the permits to be a full-fledged strip-club and they are running a bar w/ scantily dressed women but that are technically not allowed to take anything off.
carlos_spiceyweiner
9 years ago
Dancer95 - The quality here has taken a total nosedive in the past few years. I've hit dive bars in this area for 25 years. Although they were dives, I used to see a lot of hot women. Sure there were a few carrying some extra weight or others who were just bad, but they were the exception. Now there are awful, awful dancers all over the place--women who probably shouldn't even be taking their clothes off in private who for some reason think they can make a living doing it. I'd love to see your 108 lb. ass here, and you might bank. But girls like these have lowered the quality so much that a lot of guys stop at a club like this once, then turn around and never come back.

Papi - I've written these people off as clueless. They don't seem to want to run a club that hobbyists would actually like. They're running a cheap bar with dancers as window dressing. The managers and bartenders are all very big girls themselves, so I'm guess they never danced and have no idea how to run a SC. Looks like they've hired some of their friends to work there. We know how that goes: "Oh, you have a good body, honey. A lot of guys would like you. You're just curvy. You could dance."

Hey, so what are you folks doing for Halloween?
georgmicrodong
9 years ago
There's a couple of clubs in Louisville that allegedly pretty much only have girls like that. I've only been to one of them, and only because that one seems to swing between hot and hog. I've lucky to mostly be there when the pendulum is on the hot side.
Dancer_
9 years ago
Carlos, I hear about lowering of dancer's quility all the time from both custies and strippers. Dunno, I guess, it's cause money declines and guys want more for less? Thus dancing is not worth it anymore for some really gorgeous girls. Idk, I started working just a year ago so didn't witness so-called golden age of stripping. Also considering that dances are only 5$-10$, pretty strippers just might move away to Vegas,NYC, etc. But then again, lappers from fuglies can not be fairly-priced at all. I wonder, what was the first - nasty-looking strippers or dirt cheap dances?
chessmaster
9 years ago
^$10 dances always make me wonder how hot the dancers could actually be if they are willing to grind on strangers for $5-$10. Of course some areas with lower cost of living the clubs are cheaper but you can do better than $10 in Ohio.
san_jose_guy
9 years ago
Front room friendliness, instead of letting her sell you dances.

If front room friendliness is impossible, then the place is a clip joint. Best to never come back.

If you like the girl and she gets friendly with you in the front room, nothing else matters.

If you don't like the girl, then just leave here alone and don't do anything until you find one you do like.

Don't let girls sell you dances.

My philosophy.

SJG
https://sites.google.com/site/sjgportal/…
motorhead
9 years ago
Worst VIP:

Me: Can I touch you?

Dancer: you can touch my arms.
sclvr5005
9 years ago
"Dancer: you can touch my arms."

Please tell me that your kidding!
san_jose_guy
9 years ago
Front room friendliness. Don't let her sell you dances.

Can you see that if one does it that way, they would never be in the type of situation you are describing?

SJG
https://sites.google.com/site/sjgportal/…
TheeOSU
9 years ago
Carlos, you deserve some form of hazard pay for even considering going to Top/Bottom Shelf considering the hideous beings that were in the pictures you posted.
DoctorDarby
9 years ago
I had been planning on checking this place out since it is in my old stomping grounds, but I may skip it based on that visual nightmare. Part of the problem may be the "urban" strip club image perpetrated in the rap videos. Nasty looking girls, big booties, lots of tats and general thuggery seems to be the rule in those places. It sounds (and looks) like that is what they are going for, which is exactly the opposite of what folks like us are looking for. Compare this to Gatsby's, another Canton club, which projects more of a blue collar, factory-bar vibe and tends to draw better dancers and clientele and keep the $5 dance price. Their VIP was pretty open as I recall, but at least it had couches. Thanks for the scouting report Carlos!
jester214
9 years ago
I've had two air dances happen in VIP.

One was actually worse than the table dance because a bouncer was staring at her the entire time.

The other I should have known better after the table dances but she was so hot that I wanted to believe when she told me the VIP would be better.
JamesSD
9 years ago
Luckily for me my worst VIP has simply been getting the exact same dance I could have gotten for half the price, but with slightly more privacy.
chessmaster
9 years ago
@doctordarby, big booties, lots of tats and general thuggery are not synonymous with nasty looking girls. I have seen nice looking girls with tats and big booties and "nasty looking girls" exist in more than just urban strip clubs.
DoctorDarby
9 years ago
You are correct chessmaster. My attempt to generalize made it seem that all of those things were negative and exclusively urban. As an ass man, a big, firm booty is a plus and tats are generally not a problem on otherwise attractive girls. Scary dancers can be found in many small, low-scale clubs, regardless of location and their qualities (good or bad) vary according to one's taste.
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