Q: What’s the difference between your wife and your job? A: After five years your job will still suck.
Q: Why did God give men penises? A: So they'd have at least one way to shut a wife up.
Q: What's the difference between your bonus and your dick? A: You don't have to beg your wife to blow your bonus.
Q: What is love A: The delusion that one woman is different than all the others
Q: Why did God invent the yeast infection? A: So your wife could know what it's like to live with an irritating cunt.
Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife? A. 45 pounds and dozens of blowjobs.
Q: How do you know when it's time to get a new dishwasher? A: When the old one expects you to "do your share"
Q: How do you turn a fox into an elephant? A: Marry it
Q: If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong? A: Made her chain too long.
Q: How is your wife like a condom? A: Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.
Q: Why does a bride smile when she walks up the aisle? A: She knows she’s given her last blow job.
Q: What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90% A: Wedding cake
Replies (10)Latest
Women – can't live with them – thank god for strippers
You miss your wife, JS? You just need more practice at the gun range..... ;-)
dawg, I'm taking my concealed carry test in two weeks so I'm getting lots o practice.
How do you cure a girl of nymphomania?
Marry'r
So far, I've missed my ex wife a lot. With every shot so far. I'm a horrible aim.
I have a bumper sticker that says I miss my wife, but my aim is improving
I have a t-shirt that says "I used to be fucking stupid but then we broke up". :)
Sounds like JS just got taken to the cleaners by divorce attorney. Good list of jokes....
Joe and scat, if you ever want to know what to get me for Christmas, is live one of those shirts.
Minnow, my lawyer was far better ( and more expensive) than hers. I came out of it pretty good considering where it could've gone. But still pisses me off that I have to pay her as much as I pay the DS each month.
"is live" = "I'd love."
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