How to best meet outside a club, so to assure safety of both?

avatar for drpenn
drpenn
Texas
Several weeks ago I enjoyed the company of a very talented and intelligent dancer. Part of the enjoyment inside the club was discussion of what I would really like, which could only occur outside the club. The dancer is game for this. We exchanged numbers. Now I have the opportunity to pass through her town again, so I texted her. She has replied, with rather stimulating photos and encouragement to make arrangements with her when my visit is closer. The plans are legal, so that is not a concern. Rather, I want to assure a sense of safety for both of us, that no harm or rip-off is planned, so I am writing to gain advice about this.

My plans are the following:
-Get a legitimate hotel room and register under my true name. This should discourage any criminal intent and show no criminal intent on my part.
-Get her true name or name that she would have on an ID.
-Include her name on the hotel registration a provide a key.
-Arrive at the hotel earlier than she arrive and get settled.
-Have her come up to the room or call from registration so I know of her arrival.
-Make sure she is alone when she arrives at the room.
-She has seen my ID, so she knows my name and has the upper hand with regards to knowledge. She should therefore comply to level this.

If she is unwilling to go with this plan and provide her name, then:
-The same as above, but she must call and I will meet her in the lobby prior to going to the room.
-By this means, no one outside of me has the room number.

As far as hotels go, the first plan is no big deal; I have spent plenty of nights with two people arriving at separate times with different surnames and separate keys, specifically, my significant other and I. I want to meet this dancer though because she is so sexy and has agreed to indulge some kinky yet legal activity with me. The second plan seems safer, but more troublesome and less trusting.

Other suggestions and/or critique of the above plans are welcomed.

55 comments

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avatar for motorhead
motorhead
10 years ago
I bet your mom made you wear a bicycle helmet.
avatar for SlickSpic
SlickSpic
10 years ago
And he didn't even owns bike...it was for nap time. Daydreaming can be dangerous
avatar for tumblingdice
tumblingdice
10 years ago
Doc,did you just piss yourself?
avatar for drpenn
drpenn
10 years ago
Thanks for ragging on me rather than being helpful.
I went to the trouble to post coherently and you get your jollies by one-liners.
I am rather more adventurous than you might imagine.
Walked cliffs at night, skydived, and white water rafted.
None of that was with relative strangers who might want to conceal their identities.
Maybe I have more to lose than most if something went amiss, so yes, I will not be careless.
Whatever, I am not stooping to your level.
How about members here try to be intelligent rather than behaving lowbrow as is presumed of partakers of the entertainment discussed here?
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
Motörhead, you are funny as shit.

dr, what the hell are you so afraid of? do you have reason to think she has a pimp? If so stay away. If not just meet and fuck. It's not hard.

And demanding her full name is fucking nuts. You will scare every stripper and escort away with that shit. You should not have given her your real full name but too late for that now.

If I were doing this I would have arranged to take her to dinner at a nice restaurant. Then I would have taken her back to the hotel and fucked her. Then after she swallows I would pay her. That's what I'm doing tonight

You're making it 10,000 times harder than it needs to be.
avatar for drpenn
drpenn
10 years ago
She saw my full name, but may not recall it. The dinner idea is good. Thanks, JS.
avatar for tumblingdice
tumblingdice
10 years ago
The second coming of Alucard.
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
10 years ago
^ so true

I think you have everything covered. I always make sure when I set up a rendezvous to let the stripper have a room key. That way she can have her thug boyfriend come in unannounced, hit me over the head and rob me.

avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
10 years ago
I'm also wondering what specifically you're trying to avoid here.

First off, while there many places that don't require a credit card, I've never heard of a decent hotel or motel that will let you stay without having ID. So using your "true name" to register is probably going to happen whether you want it to or not. Unless you have access to someone with exceptional skill at forgery.

Second, I also agree that demanding, even with a fallback, her real name before she's swallowed even one kid of your jizz is probably contraindicated. The facade of anonymity that using their stage name gives to some of these women actually makes it easier for them to meet OTC. Take that away, even suggest you want to take it away, before she's ready, and you might queer the whole deal. Besides which, I've seen more than a couple of fake IDs in the possession of strippers, so you won't know anyway.

The idea of meeting her in the lobby is a good one, you should do that anyway, whether she gives you her name or not. You should be in the lobby when she arrives, to see if anyone accompanies her. You should also pay attention when you head to the room, to make sure no one follows. And take the stairs, not the elevator. Easier to notice when some is following.

When you get in the room, lock the door and don't let her near it, so she can't let her friend with a baseball bat in. Unless you brought a gun to a bat fight, that is. :)
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
10 years ago
Just a note, I banged one stripper monthly for almost 2 years and all she knew about me was what state I lived in, my first name and my phone number. Most of them really don't care how much they know about you.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
10 years ago
Oh, and don't share the registration on the room unless you're OK with law enforcement or your spouse's lawyer seeing you in the company of a stripper meeting outside the club.

With the exception of my ATF, after two years of seeing her, I have *never* given one of these girls a key to my room, regardless of how long we were staying.
avatar for Dougster
Dougster
10 years ago
Use RickyBoy's The System.
avatar for rockstar666
rockstar666
10 years ago
Since when is fucking a stripper OTC akin to rocket science? Your only problem is that since she's a stripper, there's a 50-50 chance she stands you up.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
I give the DS a key to my hotel room while I'm in her club. but then again, I'm not really afraid that she's going to slit my throat while I fuck her. given your unstated but obvious fear of this woman, I do have to agree that giving her the room key sounds like a counterintuitive move. And why would you even dream of putting her name on the room with yours? I go to great lengths to hide any record of the fact that I am traveling around with a gorgeous young thing less than half my age.

As an aside, I know it wasn't intentional, but thanks for one of the funniest threads in a while.
avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe
10 years ago
depends, is the issue not being beat up by a boyfriend/pimp or not being traced (e.g., by a PI if you're going through a breakup)?

I think we've all assumed the former! I don't think the issue is not knowing her identity! I suspect a girl that would hatch the plot of "my boyfriend will beat him up and rob him" won't care if you know her name!

She'll count on you being too embarrassed to call the cops and say "I was meeting Peggy Sue Ricketts in my hotel room but her boyfriend burst in and beat me up and took my money -- what? -- why was I meeting Ms. Ricketts? -- um, well, you see, she agreed to fuck me for $500" ;)

Just grab a room and meet her in the lobby! Don't give her a key! Have fun and stay safe! :)
avatar for drpenn
drpenn
10 years ago
I knew I did not have this all figured out so I posted humbly to learn, not to brag that I am some sort of genius or to be mocked. If it were so easy, I wouldn't have sought the experience of others, whether they are anonymous, cowardly jerks or considerate enthusiasts. I leave the itemized categorizations to others.

Much more constructive discussion; thank you for the critical assessment and good ideas.
avatar for busta_nut
busta_nut
10 years ago
Also, bring a permission slip from your mother...notarized...
avatar for Bigbiznezz
Bigbiznezz
10 years ago
Man get you one of them motel where you have to enter from the outside. Make sure it's a clean one. Be outside or looking out the window and watch her drive around and see if someone is following her. Then come outside and look around. But this ain't backpage u talking bout. Most strippers I meet and exchange phone numbers with haven't tried to knock me upside the head yet and are very discreet. They are either all about the money and will let you know upfront. Or they like you and it's just someone you go out with and maybe will fuck from time to time. With no money involved unless you just being generous
avatar for chandler
chandler
10 years ago
I wouldn't pay for the room until she shows up, either at an agreed spot or in the hotel parking lot, or else there's a 50/50 chance you'll be a party of one. Hotel rooms are great for fucking, but kind of depressing for hanging out by yourself.

Don't give her a key, and don't let her stay in the room after you've left! Nothing that requires her to talk to the front desk. And no real names. Keep it simple.

But really, your plan is so alarmingly naive, I think you need to do more research before going ahead with this. Not that it needs to be complicated, but just to get more up to speed. Go back and find some past threads about OTC experiences, good and harrowingly bad. Google the shit out of related topics, and so on. And google this chick's phone number to see if she has sketchy looking escort ads, etc.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
10 years ago
I take a lot of girls OTC in any given year and my humble advice is to keep it simple dr. As others have said, she's not going to want to share that kind of information with you and you'll probably creep her out if you ask. Also, as well covered here, there are many good reasons why you don't want her to be on the registry and to have a room key (or the ability to get one).

In my opinion, your best defense is to just book a nice hotel for your first encounter with her. I have never had a robbery issue with any of the countless strippers I have taken OTC, so I don't think it is common to be honest, but every robbery story that I have read her and elsewhere involved a perp with direct outside access to the door of the victims' rooms. I'm guessing that many perps just aren't interested in walking to and from the scene of the crime past hotel employees in a manned lobby, being recorded on cameras in various places and then enduring a very long trip back to the getaway vehicle after the deed is done.

Now I do also wait in the lobby or even outside the front entrance during a first time meet with a new OTC partner. I have never encountered anything problematic with a stripper when doing this, but I do believe that it saved my bacon once with a backpage girl. That is a story for another time, but suffice it to say that I never again dialed up a girl from BP after that.
avatar for sclvr5005
sclvr5005
10 years ago
10:1 that she has no intention of meeting this person OTC.
avatar for warhawks
warhawks
10 years ago

If the OP is really concerned about his safety, try going to a hotel with security cameras visible.
Meet in the lobby and make a off the cuff comment about how "this hotel sure does have a lot of surveillance cameras in it..." So that she knows/is aware.

Or, if it's possible in your area, meet at a casino with a casino hotel attached.
Nothing goes on in a casino without it being taped. They have security cameras everywhere...
avatar for Estafador
Estafador
10 years ago
I think everything is covered here. Just cover your Johnson and don't let her drink the refreshments. She needs non-jazz fizz tell her to drink from the aink
avatar for seaboardrr
seaboardrr
10 years ago
I would suggest getting the hotel room saved online first in just your name. Meet her somewhere public and maybe grab a bite to eat first to see if she arrives by herself and if you feel comfortable. If you've already found a hotel save it so when she actually arrives and you feel good about it just pull up the hotel on your phone and book it. It's paid for already so when you get there you just sign for it get the keys and head up. That would save the $$$ in case she never shows but if you feel like it just get it all done beforehand, visit the front desk to get your key and check out the room THEN go meet her. Don't put any info of hers on the registration and do not give her a key. Personally, I wouldn't give her the room # and tell her to come up. You never know who could be standing next to the door out of your line of sight.

Just be smart like with anything else.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
Men and women have been doing P4P forever; you make it sound like you are taking the 1st manned trip to Mars.

Some precaution is called for so option two seems like a good compromise.

As others have mentioned; your chances are much greater that you get stood up – you should also clearly outline what you expect and for how much b/f the meet; do not pay in advance and tell her so b/f you arrange the meet; and don't take any valuables w/ you or leave them laying around unattended (i.e. don't leave your wallet and your cash in the room while you go shower or take a whiz).
avatar for azdd
azdd
10 years ago
Hey Doc, I agree with the general consensus that you might be over-thinking this. One thing not mentioned in your plan is whether you have agreed on the activities menu and price. I don't know if you are actually an MD, PhD, or other type of Doctor, but you are obviously articulate and well educated, which suggests you are probably a man of considerable means.

Your dancer almost certainly knows this, and that may be why she was so flirty with you about OTC. Dancers can sense money combined with inexperience a mile away, and will pounce on you like a lioness on a wounded gazelle. If you don't define the terms, she will, and will then likely ask for more money for every incremental addition to the menu. I agree with the others about the room. Rent it like you would for any other business travel. Don't give her a key. Meet for dinner if you want, or have her text you from the parking lot so you can go down and walk her in. If it's an upscale hotel, and you have to walk in through the lobby, suggest that she not dress like a stripper, but multiple outfits once in the room are always fun! Good luck.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
Hope shadowcat doesn't end up doing one of his “special reports” w.r.t. this guy :) (inside joke doc)
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
10 years ago
@drpenn - as a newb you probably didn't realize that there are tons of dancers out there who will promise OTC activities and never follow thru. So honestly you may not have to worry much about all of that other stuff because it's doubtful that she'll want anything more than having you return to the club to spend alot more money on her.
avatar for Dougster
Dougster
10 years ago
rockstar: "Since when is fucking a stripper OTC akin to rocket science?"

If it wasn't RickyBoy won't have need a system now would he? Unless he's a complete idiot.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
10 years ago
Just do a background check on her before meeting up. Make sure she's not wanted. I like to check backgrounds, retina scans and fingerprints before meeting up with a strange dancer. You can never be too careful. You could ask for an HIV test too but she might get pissed off at you. Wouldn't this be cool if you could get all this information before getting a lap dance too?
I usually forget to do all this and may even forget to ask her last name. I live dangerous.
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
10 years ago
Escorts will investigate you. If it's above the backpage level, it goes beyond just looking at your ID. Check out date-check.com or preferred411.com .

In my experience, American strippers will only do OTC after dropping decent $$$ multiple times ITC. No ID checks involved though.

Canadian strippers who do OTC will offer it after a couple three dances. Cause people are nice, eh.

Hotels don't care what you're doing. They only care that the people who do care what you're doing don't know what you're doing and don't know that the hotel doesn't care what you're doing.
avatar for drpenn
drpenn
10 years ago
More good stuff.
No need to reveal my education level, that is not pertinent.
Of course I am a newb at this; one post, duh.
Plenty of strip club experience without any trouble inside the club.

I would not expect to read of even a few people having been knocked up the head by strippers' pimps here. I would expect such failures would lead to embarrassment and an unwillingness to share what went wrong. Therefore I asked what works. But rather than being totally helpless, I offered some effort of thought. Can't win here. If I just posted "tell me how to do this?" I would expect everyone to reply UTFSE. Then I try to make an effort, and get some fraction of criticism for being naive or overdoing it or whatever. It's a discussion board. So I started a discussion. Excuse me.

So far the suggestion from her has not involved money or a meet up at the club again. No dollar figures have been discussed or implied. She is smart and putting herself through some education. That could be a line, but so could everything by everyone, including here. Maybe no one here has actually banged or met up with anyone outside as we probably don't encourage even other members to verify claims with eyewitness accounts, but we have some level of trust. But I have not heard from her the usual stuff about kids, or exes, or whining about stuff so many others carry on about. She likes what she does and has a plan. That is comforting on one hand, but then again cause me some caution as a smart opponent (if indeed an opponent) is a more challenging opponent.

I was not about to presume nothing ever goes wrong, and I had a perception that if it does go wrong, it goes really wrong. Some cash lost is no big deal. Every strip club visit is some cash lost. Car or wallet stolen is worse. Physical injury, still worse.

Anyone here actually willing to tell of their carelessness that led to their own injury?
Surely not everyone has had perfect experiences, no lapse in judgement of character, or a botched plan of their own?
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
Most of us on here are actually pretty open about our good and bad experiences and in particular our bad experiences – is part vent and part a heed to others.

As has been mentioned; pretty much most issues revolve around the dancer flaking out or asking for more $$$ if this was not ironed out beforehand.

Just b/c they are dancers does not mean they are hardcore criminals – dancing is legal and most of these girls often have low-education skills and dancing sure beats working @ Walmart and most are just trying to pay the bills – many of these women also have families and children so they too have a lot to lose.

w.r.t. her “education” - could be true – who knows – but any seasoned SCer will tell you dancers claiming to be in school or have degrees bla bla bla is as common a lie as dudes lying about the size of their wiener (and mine is huge of course – I wouldn't lie).
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
10 years ago
Sometimes the only way to learn about dancer hustles is to get hustled a few times. For people who don't hang out in strip clubs, the thought of a girl behaving the way that many strippers do is so alien that they cannot wrap their minds around it.

After all, she seemed so genuine. How could all of that have been an act? Why would she lie about something like that? What kind of person plays such cruel games like that? Doesn't she know that I would have stuck around longer if she was just honest with me? Blah, blah, blah.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
Where the hell is Juice with his wisdom when you need him (again; inside joke)
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
10 years ago
The worst thing that could happen is if she has shady friends. Don't give out your real name or keys. You know where she works so odds are she will show up at your door by herself. .
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
OP – don't take the responses on here too personally or harshly – is just some dude/lopaw on dude rookie hazing.

I was hesitant at first to join this board thinking it would consist of a whole bunch lowlife pervs – but was surprised that many on here are smart; educated, successful dudes/lopaw; with a LOT of SC experience (and general life experience also) – i.e. most of the dudes/lopaw on here are good guys/lady.

avatar for lopaw
lopaw
10 years ago
To date the worst experience that I have had OTC was a NCNS, which ticked me off but no harm was done to either my wallet or my person.
Anyone willing to risk meeting a stripper OTC can not afford to be careless. AAMOF it tends to lean heavily the other direction, sometimes towards crippling paranoia for first timers which ultimately has them changing their mind and calling it off.
I would think that any of the long term posters here would be willing to share an embarassiing story, if there is a story to be told.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
Yeah – best to avoid any personal info b/c it can then get more complicated to get rid of her when you see her true colors.

Most hardcore SCers will either use a burn phone or use a burn-app on their smart phone or get a Google ph # as to not give a stripper one's real ph # - it's a good PL practice.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
“NCNS”? (No Call No Show)

“AAMOF” (As A Matter Of Fact)


Had to look them up
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
10 years ago
lol sorry Papi....I love acronyms. That, and I am too lazy to spell everything out :D
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
10 years ago
Before I'll do OTC, they have to say "African or European" when I ask them what the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow is. Screens out the unintelligent ones, and is a safety check against getting hurled into the Pit of Death.
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
I can't believe that something so easy can be made to sound so complicated. I could fuck 5-10 strippers in the time it would take to construct some of the complicated scenarios that are suggested here. If I were that afraid if something I wouldn't do it.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
10 years ago
One bad thing happened to me one time early on. I did not mention anything about money and neither did one dancer until later in the evening when I was getting ready to take her home. I got pissed when I found out she wanted money for the time we spent together. Yes I thought the time we spent together was more like a date. I wasn't expecting to be asked for money. I said no to start with. In fact I would have never even suggested even meeting her if I had known she wanted money. Long story short, she cried. I eventually caved in and gave her some money. I was cash rich at the time compared to many people. I was new to strip clubs and not really spending my money on anything. She somehow became a friend of mine but I was pissed off at her for a while. Not so much after she cried. It could have all been an act but who knows. I haven't seen too many dancers cry that realistically. She cried again when I told her goodbye a couple of years later with her claiming she was in love. Was that real? I wasn't sure. I was moving so nothing I could do.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
Hire Mr. T as your bodyguard
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
10 years ago
"I can't believe that something so easy can be made to sound so complicated. I could fuck 5-10 strippers in the time it would take to construct some of the complicated scenarios that are suggested here. If I were that afraid if something I wouldn't do it."

---
+1 John Smith



avatar for motorhead
motorhead
10 years ago
The old guys might remember a frequent poster named DougS.

Dang, he would write about all kinds of secret shit he would do to keep his hobby from his wife.

He must have been a CIA spook in a past life.
avatar for seaboardrr
seaboardrr
10 years ago
Don't want to worry about hiding it from your wife? Have your wife and the stripper set it up together.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
@drpenn I'm assuming you play tennis?
avatar for ididthisonce
ididthisonce
10 years ago
I can't blame a guy for being careful. Reminds me of Mickey Rourke in the movie "Body Heat"...."There are 50 ways you can fuck up. If you can remember 25 of them, then you are genius. You ain't no genius".

Go to 1:50 for the start of the conversation
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLAbh_Lc…

Drpenn has his reasons for being discreet. Over fifteen year ago I wasn't and went to her room where she had hidden cameras. I don't think she wanted to film me for having a porn star pecker, but it cost me some very tense moments and nearly $40K later to ride myself of the situation. Was married at the time with two small children and obviously wanted to any playtime to be ultra private. In this hobby you are always taking chances. My two cents is to make damn sure that YOU control the situation. Ididthisonce and could damn near write a book on the afore episode.

ididthisonce <<<< never claimed to be the sharpest tack in the box.
avatar for ididthisonce
ididthisonce
10 years ago
that would be rid.
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
10 years ago
@Che: Idk dude, that's some crazy shit. You are highly likely to skeeve a girl out if you jam a wedge into the door, try to control where she can go in the room and won't let her take her purse into the bathroom. Paranoia is one thing, but you have to balance it with a little reasonableness.

The odds of shit going down in a nicer hotel that the customer books himself are extremely low to begin with, for all of the reasons I and others already discussed. I think that meeting her in the lobby is more than sufficient for an added check. I do like the lobby bar suggestion though and I've done it a few times myself for first time meetups, though unfortunately many of those lobby bars close too early and instead I am left to hang out on a couch or chair in the lobby.

Look, you can let paranoia run wild if you get crazy about it, but at some point it is just no longer worth the effort if you are so worried that you have to resort to extreme measures.
avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe
10 years ago
Che, I'm curious about your suggestion of the 3rd floor specifically. What is the rationale there!

On a serous note, I've never stayed in an upscale hotel that has rooms with outside doors or rooms on the first floor. I don't think they would allow an obvious hooker with a pimp/shady boyfriend in tow through to the elevator. That, in my mind, is the major danger! Specifically, the issue is misjudging and going for a lower class of girl than you think. A girl making $500+ for an hour isn't likely to pull shit, she's going to take the money and be happy!

With anything there is some risk, but it can be minimized! ;)
avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe
10 years ago
I'd be a lot more paranoid about lapdanceking82's $15 encounter, presumably in a car! I wouldn't do that! ;)
avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe
10 years ago
No disrespect to lapdanceking82! Living your life on your terms is the brilliant way to go! lapdanceking82 is clearly doing that! ;) ;) ;)
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