"Southern Fried Stings" on TruTV

11/15/2010 7:01:00 PM

Okay, MNF being a blowout sent me surfing with the remote. I came across "Southern Fried Stings". It's a private detective reality tv show, which sure seems awfully staged.

That said, the first segment took place at a strip club ("Nepals", wherever that is...) Apparently the club owner was concerned as a bunch of his customers were getting robbed in the VIP area (most recently Jay's (the lead personality) friend had had his engagement ring stolen. So it's personal...

Anyways, Jay and crew powder die some money Jay takes into the club. Jay and the stripper his friend had head to the VIP for a $200 half hour session. A second comes over and sits on Jay's other side. Second dancer leaves, but then the waitress arrives and dumps her tray on Jay. They clean Jay off and the waitress disappears. Dancer then begins half hour VIP dance.

Dance concludes and Jay reaches into his pocket only to find his money is gone. He accuses dancer #1 of taking his money, and grabs the other dancer too. Has the two of them half naked against the wall (blurred for TV of course) and proceeds to use special light to check for die residue on their hands. They're all clean.

Then club bouncer rages in and wants to know what's going on. Jay's security guy and bouncer square off. Chaotic scene occurs, culminating on bouncer sucker punching Jay's guy and both crash to ground. Jay's female crew member arrives with tazer and zaps club bouncer. Waitress then returns irate. Jay shines light on her hands and finds the die residue. Takes her out of club and cuffs her, but not before her hands on the hood reveal the same ring she took the day before. Jay then wraps the segment by stating the bouncer and waitress are boyfriend and girlfriend, and that he looked the other way while she stole.

Second segment: Mother calls Jay because of her son's odd behavior. She's worried he may be involved in drugs and/or dealing. Jay and crew tail son to a club in sletchy part of town. They film him going to the back of his van. A minute later he emerges dressed as a woman and heads into the bar.

Jay calls client down to bar so she can see for herself. Client arrives, and rather conviently, son emrges from bar with older beau on his arm. Client recognizes older beau as her ex-boyfriend. Dysfunction ensues ... Jay then narrates video of the threesome leaving together, stating they've "accpeted to love him as he is."

Third (and final) segment: Rural homeowner calls Jay because of unwanted guests on his wooded acreage. Tells Jay he's heard voices, found beer bottles, and fireworks going off. So, Jay, and his 3 assistants, all dressed in camoflague (to sneak up on hunters of course!), head off into the woods.

A little ways in and they stop because of rustling in the bushes ahead. Throwing caution to the wind, an assistant desides the best course of action is to charge and belly flop over the bush. What's on the other side? Two of the most obese white people ever filmed naked, presumably having sex (blurred thankfully!) Jay tells them to get off the property as they squeeze into their clothes.

Off again to find the source of the fireworks... They see from a distance three good ol' boys firing rifles outside their tent. Jay formulates a plan where he stumbles upon the boyz acting drunk, providing a distraction for the assistants (and film crew!) to sneak up and secure the guns.

Jay's plan succeeds, but doesn't prevent the boyz from surly behavior. In fact, Jay's calling one of them Sasquatch unleahes a melee. Jay gets taken down and pinned by one of the guys, but his assistant uses the butt of the rifle to whack the guy in the back of the skull (presumably). They cuff him and ultimately get another, but the third got away. Why? Because one of Jay's assistants stepped into a bear trap and is screaming in agony. Indeed they show missing toes and blood. Later they show the x-ray (yup, missing toes!), but it's all okay according to the assistant because "the bad guys are behind bars." Uh huh. The final graphic states after two surgeries and 6 weeks of rehab, he's fine.

For an encore, tomorrow night TruTV is featuring a reality show based at The Hard Rock Hotel in Vegas. And Wednesday night is the new season of some reality show set at the "most notorious biker bar" anywhere. Lots of bikini babes featured in that promo clip. Enjoy!