tuscl

Things a Stripper Really Doesn't Want to Hear

Avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69layin low but staying high

Here's my own list of things a stripper doesn't want to hear during a VIP session.

  1. Damn, my Depends just sprung a leak.

  2. I promise to pay you next week.

  3. My daughter has a pair of underwear just like that.

  4. Will you marry me?

  5. My friends and I read on tuscl that you charge $20 extra for a blowjob.

  6. Your breasts remind me of my grandmother.

  7. Let me tell you about a strange fetish of mine.

  8. I knew I should've stopped in the bathroom before we came in here.

  9. Let's pray.

  10. Proverbs 23:27 says that prostitutes and immoral women are a deadly trap.

  11. Do you think they'll ever find where I buried the body?

  12. What happens if I pull on that white string?

  13. I'm gonna spend everything that I made bagging groceries this week on you.

  14. My motorhome is parked in the club parking lot. I'm going to meet you there after work.

  15. I love you.

  16. Can we do some Mexican bar table dancing.

  17. How much do you weigh?

  18. Is this your first day?

  19. My wife has bigger breasts than you.

  20. Mind if I use a penis pump?

Comments

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Avatar for VeryBigDawg
VeryBigDawg
  1. I got a granddaughter your age.
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Avatar for whodey
whodey
  1. I know you said I could pay you afterwards but I think I left my wallet at home. Can I just bring you the money next time?
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Avatar for Diva1975
Diva1975

I don't want to see you in a place like this I only want to see you outside of here

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Avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe
  1. Are those real?
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Avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat

Angel gives me better blow jobs and only charges me $50.

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Avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD

I dunno, 7. Depends on the fetish.

"Let's go to VIP where I can pay you to rub your beautiful feet" would be music to some strippers ears

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Avatar for PhantomGeek
PhantomGeek

My mother would really like you. Would you like to come over for Sunday dinner?

I have a dress just like that.

Would you teach me to grind like that?

I think I reached my credit limit.

Didn't you go to school with my little girl?

How about a threesome? Mom's getting pretty frisky.

Do you barter?

I'm trying to form an international alliance of sex workers. Interested?

Yeah, my twin brother's a cop. Why?

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Avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe

"Do you barter?" Brilliant!

It would be even more brilliant if you show up with goat or pig or something else crazy to trade for a good lap dance!

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Avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong

"I don't have any money."

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Avatar for jackslash
jackslash

"I'm HIV positive."

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Avatar for PhantomGeek
PhantomGeek

I have ebola.

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Avatar for oriole1
oriole1

Do you swallow? Guess they don't mind this one because I always got an answer. Try it.

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Avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong

@oriole1: That's pretty much my standard question when I get to the point where I think she'll actuallyl do something. "Spit or swallow?

More often than not lately, I've been getting positive responses.

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Avatar for rattdog
rattdog

"I have ebola."

I wonder what the percentage of girls knowing what ebola is. more or less than 50%?

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Avatar for Joe from NJ
Joe from NJ

Those don't look like real tits.

Is that the best you can do?

I have already cum, so I don't need you.

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Avatar for PhantomGeek
PhantomGeek

Mom just put too much starch in my shorts again. Honest.

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Avatar for PhantomGeek
PhantomGeek

I'll have a cheeseburger and fries. Yeah, I am here just for the food.

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Avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat

In Canada they don't like to hear that you don't like doggy because in any other position you both can't watch the hockey game.

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Avatar for StripRez
StripRez

Do you accept quarters?

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