16 comments

Ducks vs. Geese

Jan 17, 2014, 4:44 PM

Props to Papi for posting this article a couple months ago: theonion.com tuscl.net

My SC buddies (and the girls that SC with us) laughed pretty hard. The men more so.

But I've noticed that not all the dancers are "ducks" who love you when you feed them bread and quietly leave for other parts of the pond when the bread runs out. No, friends, some of these girls are GEESE! That's right. If you run out of bread they will honk, and peck, and put up all sorts of a fuss to DRIVE you AWAY from the pond! (And these are girls whom I haven't seen all night).

Now I'm no cheap-skate. Stage tips are always $5-10. I buy a lot of 15 minute specials. I buy my buddies and their girls table dances. They in turn take the girl in the back. I usually blow around $200. Most of the ducks like to see me come in. But when it's time to go...some of them turn into GEESE!

"I'd love to, but I just gave my last $3 to xxxDancer" (Probably shouldn't have mentioned the other dancer) "Well if you're BROKE just LEAVE!"

"I just spent my last $5" "You're an ass-hole" (Yep, after spending $$$ on my friend and his gf at his welcome home from the service party).

I need to review my local clubs. I think I'm going to include a "Duck-to-Geese" ratio in there somewhere. Anyone have any stories to share about the geese?

comments (16)

mjx0111 years ago

true dat... but $5-10 for stage tips? shit.

sharkhunter11 years ago

Most dancers I see are happy to get a dollar tip. Most people just sit around.

TheNakedBachelor11 years ago

Hah! Yeah. Full-nude clubs. 3-song, handsy 2way stage-sets with generous personal viewership for the generous tipper. I think the girls deserve that much in this environment. And dollars usually only get you a brief Stevie or pussy-flash.

Can't tip 'em all, so I sit just outside the action with a cold one and hit the stage for my faves. Double-tip is an invite to come see me & I'll spend some $$$ on her in the back. I need to tweek my system though. Only works 35% of the time.

BagBoyJames11 years ago

Damit ! Not a nother alies rickyboy

TheNakedBachelor11 years ago

^^^LOL! If only I had a suit!

ilbbaicnl11 years ago

Never seen the "geese" thing. It seems to me dancers just want us to follow some kind of reasonable honor system. If you watch and enjoy someone's stage dance, cough up at least a $1.

crazyjoe11 years ago

I played duck duck goose in kindergarden

lopaw11 years ago

Never have run into a goose yet.

shadowcat11 years ago

lopaw - you forgot The Wild Goose. :)

lopaw11 years ago

Lol you're right shadowcat :-D

BagBoyJames11 years ago

LOL

crazyjoe11 years ago

Honk honk

shadowcat11 years ago

Q: Do you know what a wild goose is?

A: A little off center.

farmerart11 years ago

Ducks are sluts......but I love 'em.

Geese (the Canada Goose variety) are rats of the air. I blast 'em out of the air with my shotgun whenever I get the chance at my farm, as do all the farmers in my area.

skibum60911 years ago

On the rare occasion I get shit from a dancer who is trying to guilt me into spending more money I always ask them id they've ever met a guy who was such a pussy that they did anything other than ignore them forever after that comment? As they respond my eyes glaze over and then I turn away. We're freaking men for Christ's sake, so act like one.

TheNakedBachelor11 years ago

@Ilbi - If I'm at the rail, or the girl's in my lap, I'm tipping, even if I didn't invite them over. Most of the girls know this. The rare goose attacks when I'm minding my own business in the back, finishing my last beer. Usually hustling one more dance, but I haven't seen them all night. :/

@farmer - Thanks, pal. That's why they fly south and s*** all over our waterfronts. Rats-of-the-air is about right!