Ways to know you are spending too much time at a strip club

9/21/2010 4:30:08 AM

1) Dancers ask you for a ride to work because “you’re going there anyway”
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3) You utter the phrase “I remember when at this club…” 
4) In conversation you keep asking “Which Asia?” because you know three of them. 
5) The bouncer ask you what TV channel you want to watch. 
6) The waitress and bartender argue because they both know what whiskey you drink. (The waitress was right) 
7) You know what dancers are working by what cars are parked in the lot. 
8) When you’ve seen the same outfit on three different dancers. 
9) All the people you follow on twitter have avatars that are NSFW. 
 
 
This is a collection of some of the worst dancer opening lines I have heard: 
 
1) “Will you buy me a couple drinks, I’m not drunk enough to talk to you yet” 
2) “Can I sit next to you for a second, I’m trying to hide from my parole officer 
3) Angry dancer stomps on my foot and calls me a fuckin’ dick, second dancer yells at her “not him, the other table”. 
4) Dancer walks up tries to shake my hand, knocks drink in my lap. Turns and leaves. 
5) “Men are fucking pigs…. Except you of course” 
6) “You hate me don’t you” 
7) “Don’t I know your brother?” 
8) “I’m not leaving until you buy dances from me”
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9 comments

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mikeya02

•

14 years ago

When you notice a big spender on your fav stops showing up and you get a funny answer when you ask her why.

CTQWERTY

•

14 years ago

#8 -- the outfits = LOL!!!!

Pablo Antonio

•

14 years ago

1.  When the hostess at the front door pages your favorite for you without you asking.  
 
2.  When the manager, without being asked,  goes to the VIP and tells your favorite to hurry up,  you are waiting for her downstairs. 
 
3.  When the other dancers won't ask you for a dance beause they know you are there to see X. 
 
4.  When the server on the buffet line remembers your name.  
 
5.  When the bathroom attendent asks you if you are with your favorite tonight.  
 
6.  When you know every outfit your favorite has in her locker.  
 
7.  When all the dancers in the club know your dick size.  (lol)

samsung1

•

14 years ago

1) You take the freeway off ramp to the strip club out of habit, instead of going to Home Depot which is on the next exit.
2) You go into the club anyway, just to see who is working.<o:p></o:p>
3) The bouncer salutes you when you walk in.<o:p></o:p>
4) You are asked to tutor brand new dancers on how to be a stripper.<o:p></o:p>
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steve229

•

14 years ago

Wow, same of these hit a little too close to home, lol. 
 
How about: 
 
When the DJ asks you about the dancer rotation. 
 
(You:   Bambi's in the VIP, Tiffany's should be up next.   
DJ:  Thanks, man)

georgmicrodong

•

14 years ago

When the bouncer, who asks everybody for ID, every time, doesn't bother with you anymore. 
 
When the bartender has seen you coming on the camera monitor and has your drink set at your usual spot at the bar when you walk in. 
 
When a new girl you've never seen before gets on stage, and you ask one of the waitresses who she is, the response is, "she won't do anything you like."

JackKash

•

14 years ago

#1 - Pablo, only it's the DJ!

StrongSilentttt

•

14 years ago

When you know your fav isn't there tonite simply because a different girl comes over and sits down - which none of them would do if she were there!

When the bartender includes you in the rounds of shots bought for the employees

When the bouncers forget to shoo you out at closing

travelingguy

•

14 years ago

1) When you have a key to the club in case they need your help to open or close...

2) When you get invited to a staff meeting.

3) When you miss a couple nights and all the dancers/employees call to make sure you are OK.

4) When the bouncer/DJ/Bartender asks you to cover for him for a few hours.

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