Gentlemen, when I get old I don't want to end up as a pathetic loser who has to pay young women for physical intimacy and conversation. Do any of you have any ideas of how an older man can remain attractive/interesting enough to young women such that he does not have to pay them for conversation and physical intimacy? Or is it impossible?
davids you must really enjoy preaching your gospel truth on this strip club site. I don't believe most people here do. If they want to hear preaching, they can go to church instead of a strip club site.
Here are some words of wisdom. "Don't argue with an idiot, he'll only drag you down to his level and then he's got you beat with experience."
As far as calling almost everyone on here pathetic losers, you know what they say when you hang out with a crowd? You become one of them.
Yoda: Ho-hum. I know my history. It's a rule for me never to insult anyone online who doesn't insult me first. Sometime I even let the first insult go. I know when I follow the rule and when I don't. I broke the rule once and I remember it. And say what you want about insults not keeping other in line. Do you see AN and chandler and other insulting me anymore? Yeah, some cases like you are particularly bad and you'll probably never stop. Then some people like FONDL resort to the passive aggressive strategy (completely consistent with his overall pussy-ish-ness).
Um, fuck, I can't even remember the rest of the crap you posted that I am supposed to be responding to so that's all for now. If there are lies or other distortion in your most recent posts I'll have to address them when you bring them up later as you always do.
I have good relationships with stripper who I don't spend money on AND ones that I do. It's because I treat them with respect. I think they treat me with the same respect by asking if I am having a good time (even ones that I don't normally spend money on) and talking with me for a bit - particularly when it is a slow night.
I don't care what they REALLY think. If they show me respect, that is enough.
Davids: What exactly is it that makes your system better? As I've said before, if you are picking up strippers, taking them out on dates, having sex with them and not spending any money on them well good for you. Have fun, enjoy it. Most of us here are not looking for stripper girfriends, we are looking to spend a few hoursd relaxing with a beautiful women in a NSA environment. I don't buy your resentment theoery of dancers hating guys who spend money on them. They may no want to date them but that's of little consequence to guys who DON'T Want to date them. If they resent us spending money on them so much why do I get birthday and Christmas gifts from dancers who I spend money on every year? You're using strip clubs as a singles bar. Most of the rest of us are not.
BTW Davids, your kidding yourself if you think you are putting anybody in line when you insult them. You're also full of shit when you claim that someone else always starts it. That's a tired claim that many now departed trouble makers have tried to use here over the years....they are all gone. You can't bully someone from the other side of a computer screen.
T: When I try to present my ideas that money is not necessary for good relationships with stripper or I post other ideas regarding the psychology or sociology of the situation (and I never insult regulars here before they insult me*) I have found they just end insulting me first and then start grossly misrepresenting my position.
For example, if I say "x" they will respond with "well y is clearly not the case for blah blah reasons". They aren't really try to understand or argue against statement "x" they are just trying to make themselves look good to others by thinking they have proven me wrong.
For this reason I feel compelled to insult them back by showing I can beat them at that game too. Indeed many like chandler and AN, have realized that can't beat me in either a debate or in an insult match so they just don't respond to me at all, all of their options being exhausted.
Now you are example of someone who insulted me out of the blue when I had never insulted you before. Why did you do that? Was it to win acceptance from the group? To just go with the flow?
I am aware of the pyschological phenomena you describe in the last few sentences of your post. It is known as "projection". Many regulars here suffer from it. For instance they claim that I am the one who starts with insults, when in fact it is them. I do not think it applies to me though: I just turn around what they say on them. If they want to start an insult match as opposed to reason debate, fine, but they just have to accept that they are likely to lose that too.
Do you think that I should just post my ideas and ignore their insults and correct their misrepresentation without insulting them back? I have found that if you don't put people in line when they insult you they just keep doing it more and more once they know they can get away with it.
D, it surprises me that dancers talk about their favorites in a disparaging manner. When people start complaining about others or backstabbing other dancers, it takes the fun out of the experience. It isn't my experience that guys who rarely get dances get more attention from the girls, I'll take you at your word though. If a guy generally gets only 4 LDs you get to know that that's his limit and that you may get 4 with him or he may choose to get dances from someone else.
D., what confuses me is your verbal attacks of the regulars on this board. If your method works for you, great! Everyone has their own approach. Why not 'live and let live' and enjoy what you consider to be your superior approach and experience w/o trying to change or insult others who are different from you? Perhaps you are a very attractive, communicative guy (possibly "big in the pants, too") that has a way with the ladies. If your experience is so wonderful, why are you complaining or getting involved in listening to dancers who are unhappy? You know in Psychology the adjectives we use to describe others and the labels i.e. "pathetic losers" or "assholes" are often labels we fear may apply to us. "He doth protest too much?"-T
I most certainly do find the good in dancers and spend time with those I like. There are some real gems that I have met in the clubs. Truly sweet and remarkable women that I have learned a ton of stuff from.
My problem with spending money in SCs is that it breeds contempt in the vast majority of dancers. They like you less when you spend than when you don't. Sounds a bit crazy (at first) but it's true. I have discussed this extensively elsewhere. I found that once I stopped spending money in SCs I was treated much better by the dancers and found it easier to make friends and get dates with them.
On thing that bothers me is how much contempt strippers secretly harbor for their regulars. Many a night I have talked to them and they confessed that they think their regulars are pathetic and they know that the regulars are ultimately going to get burned, but they keep leading them on anyway! (We often notice this phenomena here when we see "is the stripper really into me?" and "how to let go?" type posts.)
I don't think your story about the barmaid is too relevent to strip clubs, but it is nice the man has fun at the bar. If he starts buying jewellery for that ex-stripper look out, however!
I have never claimed that men don't have the right to spend money how they want (well obviously they shouldn't be allowed to spend it on WMDs but you know what I mean...) I just think that certain types of spending make you pathetic. Consider this example:
A man losses 50% of his income on blackjack even though he doesn't know how to beat the game. Secretly he think he knows how to win, but knows he can never admit it because he will be blown apart when he presents his "theory". So instead he claims he just gets utility out of watching the cards come out of the shoe. But everyone knows what he really thinks and wants. (Especially the casino management!)
The man is pathetic becuase of his mistaken beliefs and his denial. But still, yeah, he does have the right to spend his money like that.
What if the same man starts criticizing a card counter, who has learned that the game can, indeed, be beaten? What if he calls the card counter unethical for denying the house their fair share of money? I think it completely in line to say that such a man is pathetic, even, though, yeah, legally, he does have the right ot spend his money how he wants.
Davids, do you go out with dancers? Why not find the good in the dancers that you like and spend time with those that you like? You sound way too young to be getting bitter and resentful. You are smart, communicate well and have some great ideas. Why does it bother you that some men enjoy spending time and money on pretty dancers in the club?
My father is 61 and and his wife, 18 years younger is extremely depressed and unwilling to get help. She lays on the couch and only gets up to bathe, use the bathroom and occasionally eat something. My dad started going to a neighborhood bar to get out of the house and enjoy himself. I've been with him a few times. He has a crush on a former stripper (now a bartender) at this bar. His visits to the bar to socialize with the patrons and flirt with the barmaid make him happy. At first I was concerned because he has a major crush on this lady, but he's lost 15 pounds and is happier now then before going to the bar. People should be able to indulge in their favorite form of entertainment without being criticized, as long as they pay their bills and their hobby doesn't hurt anyone. Am I wrong? -T
So Sheen was in denial too, huh? Interesting. I hear he had some other interesting issues...
A better quote might be "why pay for prime rib when you can have it for free?"
Who on earth advocates "using" dancers. The men here who are interested in just one night stands and say none are dateable (tiffany, AN, maybe some others (CG?))?
And I hate to tell you this, but it's actually the smartest/high self-esteem dancers who are the most pickup/dateable.
Finally dancers trash each other behind their backs. Many of opinions of them are formed from talking to them and they agree with my estimations.
A number of years ago Tom Snyder interviewed Charlie Sheen (the guy whose on the tv show, "2 1/2 men"). Tom Snyder said, "Charlie, your an attractive young guy, why do you pay women to have sex with you?" Charlie replied something to the effect . . . I don't pay for the sex, I pay them to go home. In other words, he wants to have his fun and get exactly what he wants and then have no further commitment or complication like having to call the girl the next day. I think that Charlie also said, "Why settle for hamburger when you can have prime rib."
It can be less expensive financially and is definitely easier on a man to "pay for his entertainment, then get on with his life". Being the friend of a dancer or seeing her outside of the club with that attitude of, 'I'll get what I can for free and use you will not work' with a smart dancer.
Dancer's typically have hectic ever-changing lives and appreciate a good friend outside of the club, but wouldn't have the 'time of day' for a guy with a bad 'tude who trashers dancers behind their backs on this site.-T
I wouldn't pay a dime for conversation. I'm tired of conversation! I don't pay for sex, but that's a choice! I pay to see young good looking women dance for me occasionally. I don't give a rats ass about how anyone spends their time, or money! Davids - your obsession w/ freebies in the SC is old. Get a life and a job. Your philosophicle bullshit is old. What a waste of an alleged education to pontificate about intellectualism in a sc environment on tuscl. I choose to spend my time and money wherever it pleases me. Give others the same right.
You know maybe the subject is worth doing research on: There were old men like Voltaire, Bertrand Russell, and Richard Feynman who were getting young hot pussy well into their 70s w/o paying. Not sure why you guys can't do it. Maybe not as smart as these men were.
Are there books on this subject? Maybe you guys should read them: That way you could save some money and get some real (free) affection which feels oh so much better than having to pay.
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I have more thoughts on this, and a story but I will start it in its own thread.
Here are some words of wisdom. "Don't argue with an idiot, he'll only drag you down to his level and then he's got you beat with experience."
As far as calling almost everyone on here pathetic losers, you know what they say when you hang out with a crowd? You become one of them.
Um, fuck, I can't even remember the rest of the crap you posted that I am supposed to be responding to so that's all for now. If there are lies or other distortion in your most recent posts I'll have to address them when you bring them up later as you always do.
I don't care what they REALLY think. If they show me respect, that is enough.
For example, if I say "x" they will respond with "well y is clearly not the case for blah blah reasons". They aren't really try to understand or argue against statement "x" they are just trying to make themselves look good to others by thinking they have proven me wrong.
For this reason I feel compelled to insult them back by showing I can beat them at that game too. Indeed many like chandler and AN, have realized that can't beat me in either a debate or in an insult match so they just don't respond to me at all, all of their options being exhausted.
Now you are example of someone who insulted me out of the blue when I had never insulted you before. Why did you do that? Was it to win acceptance from the group? To just go with the flow?
I am aware of the pyschological phenomena you describe in the last few sentences of your post. It is known as "projection". Many regulars here suffer from it. For instance they claim that I am the one who starts with insults, when in fact it is them. I do not think it applies to me though: I just turn around what they say on them. If they want to start an insult match as opposed to reason debate, fine, but they just have to accept that they are likely to lose that too.
Do you think that I should just post my ideas and ignore their insults and correct their misrepresentation without insulting them back? I have found that if you don't put people in line when they insult you they just keep doing it more and more once they know they can get away with it.
* JC was my single exception to this rule.
D., what confuses me is your verbal attacks of the regulars on this board. If your method works for you, great! Everyone has their own approach. Why not 'live and let live' and enjoy what you consider to be your superior approach and experience w/o trying to change or insult others who are different from you? Perhaps you are a very attractive, communicative guy (possibly "big in the pants, too") that has a way with the ladies. If your experience is so wonderful, why are you complaining or getting involved in listening to dancers who are unhappy? You know in Psychology the adjectives we use to describe others and the labels i.e. "pathetic losers" or "assholes" are often labels we fear may apply to us. "He doth protest too much?"-T
I most certainly do find the good in dancers and spend time with those I like. There are some real gems that I have met in the clubs. Truly sweet and remarkable women that I have learned a ton of stuff from.
My problem with spending money in SCs is that it breeds contempt in the vast majority of dancers. They like you less when you spend than when you don't. Sounds a bit crazy (at first) but it's true. I have discussed this extensively elsewhere. I found that once I stopped spending money in SCs I was treated much better by the dancers and found it easier to make friends and get dates with them.
On thing that bothers me is how much contempt strippers secretly harbor for their regulars. Many a night I have talked to them and they confessed that they think their regulars are pathetic and they know that the regulars are ultimately going to get burned, but they keep leading them on anyway! (We often notice this phenomena here when we see "is the stripper really into me?" and "how to let go?" type posts.)
I don't think your story about the barmaid is too relevent to strip clubs, but it is nice the man has fun at the bar. If he starts buying jewellery for that ex-stripper look out, however!
I have never claimed that men don't have the right to spend money how they want (well obviously they shouldn't be allowed to spend it on WMDs but you know what I mean...) I just think that certain types of spending make you pathetic. Consider this example:
A man losses 50% of his income on blackjack even though he doesn't know how to beat the game. Secretly he think he knows how to win, but knows he can never admit it because he will be blown apart when he presents his "theory". So instead he claims he just gets utility out of watching the cards come out of the shoe. But everyone knows what he really thinks and wants. (Especially the casino management!)
The man is pathetic becuase of his mistaken beliefs and his denial. But still, yeah, he does have the right to spend his money like that.
What if the same man starts criticizing a card counter, who has learned that the game can, indeed, be beaten? What if he calls the card counter unethical for denying the house their fair share of money? I think it completely in line to say that such a man is pathetic, even, though, yeah, legally, he does have the right ot spend his money how he wants.
My father is 61 and and his wife, 18 years younger is extremely depressed and unwilling to get help. She lays on the couch and only gets up to bathe, use the bathroom and occasionally eat something. My dad started going to a neighborhood bar to get out of the house and enjoy himself. I've been with him a few times. He has a crush on a former stripper (now a bartender) at this bar. His visits to the bar to socialize with the patrons and flirt with the barmaid make him happy. At first I was concerned because he has a major crush on this lady, but he's lost 15 pounds and is happier now then before going to the bar. People should be able to indulge in their favorite form of entertainment without being criticized, as long as they pay their bills and their hobby doesn't hurt anyone. Am I wrong? -T
So Sheen was in denial too, huh? Interesting. I hear he had some other interesting issues...
A better quote might be "why pay for prime rib when you can have it for free?"
Who on earth advocates "using" dancers. The men here who are interested in just one night stands and say none are dateable (tiffany, AN, maybe some others (CG?))?
And I hate to tell you this, but it's actually the smartest/high self-esteem dancers who are the most pickup/dateable.
Finally dancers trash each other behind their backs. Many of opinions of them are formed from talking to them and they agree with my estimations.
It can be less expensive financially and is definitely easier on a man to "pay for his entertainment, then get on with his life". Being the friend of a dancer or seeing her outside of the club with that attitude of, 'I'll get what I can for free and use you will not work' with a smart dancer.
Dancer's typically have hectic ever-changing lives and appreciate a good friend outside of the club, but wouldn't have the 'time of day' for a guy with a bad 'tude who trashers dancers behind their backs on this site.-T
It is quite simple...
Just don't be anything like yourself!