Thanks, no thanks.
meatstack
But here's the thing, every club I've ever gone to, a dancer will sit down, and plant herself there all night. It's cool for like 30 minutes, maybe longer if she's good to talk to, but with her there, she's blocking me from the others. I know what's going on. She sees me as a walking dollar sign. I'm middle aged, well income, with wedding band. easy couple lap dances. And, usually, she's right. I'm a safe bet. But, I can't seem to get her to go away. Sometimes I've tried to be direct. I've tried to talk about other girls...nothing seems to get rid of them.
without being a total cock, what would you suggest here to get them to take their "charms" to someone else?
Thanks in advance. I hope yall have good hunting.
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The truth is the wife is really cool about it. She doesn't care where I get hungry, as long as I get dinner at home.
When you see a dancer you want a dance from, tell Miss Cling-on you have to go to the bathroom. Come out and go over and start talking to the dancer that interests you.
If they don't take the hints, tell them you're not interested as directly as possible. Sometimes you need to do that to chase them off.
One time I did have a dancer stay at my table and argue with me for 15 whole minutes and then I got up and sat at the stage because she was just being totally disagreeable. That was the only time I remember having to get up and move to get away. I did have one other dancer drag me and my chair about 50 feet across a club towards the lap dance room before I put my feet more firmly down. Sofa chair had wheels. That was very unusual.
I still don't have a good way of dealing with this so, often, this hustle is pretty effective on me.
Keep in mind, if you're making the slightest effort not to be an asshole - you're probably way ahead of the curve, nothing you do is likely to cost more than a few bucks to erase.
She is being rude to you by monopolizing your time; space; and in her hopes; your wallet.
If you would not take a certain type of behavior from any other sales person; you don’t have to take it from her. She is just trying to take your $$$ and your time; and you don’t owe her either.
As others have said; I’ll usually tell them “I’m not getting any dances right now†– or “I just want to chill by myself for a while†– and if that does not work – I’ll get up and walk to another spot in the club.
Many of these dancers live their lives outside the norms of society – so you trying to interact w/ them according to the norms of society (i.e. being polite and patient) will have no effect on them.
What you say makes perfect sense when dealing with sane dancers.
90% of the time; a dancer will leave you alone when you say you do not want any dances.
But there is a *definitely* a small minority like the type the OP described in many if not all clubs where you can say no in multiple ways and they will still not go away – similar to a guy/customer asking for sex; you turning him down; and he keeps on asking (I imagine you have run into these types)
If one SCs enough, they will come across this minority (dancers) more than one would care for.
It looks like you are a dancer – I imagine if you’ve danced long enough that you may have come across some of these whack job dancers?
Now having said that, there are nicer ways to move them along. If a girl that I am not interested in sits uninvited and is not getting the hint after a few minutes, I smile and let her know, calmly, that I'm sorry, but that I'm looking to chill out by myself for a while. Sometimes they look at me startled, or unsure, at which point I look them firmly in the eye (again smiling and calm) and repeat myself. This virtually always works and I don't often get bad reactions - it is as much about delivery as the message.
As a side note, the problem with "not right now" is that some of them see that as an invitation to come back later and some will even try to wait it out. And "I'm waiting for someone" can backfire if the girl asks who you are waiting for and offers to get her for you, which some of the savvier dancers will do as they know that this line is often BS.
The combination of friendly but firm and direct works out well for me. In most cases, calmness and a smile will allay any bad reactions, but you will inevitably run across a small % of girls who just do not handle rejection well no matter how kindly delivered. When this happens, c'est la vie as it is a small price to pay for not letting a girl who you do not want monopolize valuable club time.
Enforcing your space with a giant two handed sword, on the other hand, might be entertaining.