Thanks, no thanks.

avatar for meatstack
meatstack
Ok, I'm new to your board, but before everyone flips out, I want to say I'm not looking for OTC, or handjobs, or anything...I'm just looking to look at some titties.

But here's the thing, every club I've ever gone to, a dancer will sit down, and plant herself there all night. It's cool for like 30 minutes, maybe longer if she's good to talk to, but with her there, she's blocking me from the others. I know what's going on. She sees me as a walking dollar sign. I'm middle aged, well income, with wedding band. easy couple lap dances. And, usually, she's right. I'm a safe bet. But, I can't seem to get her to go away. Sometimes I've tried to be direct. I've tried to talk about other girls...nothing seems to get rid of them.

without being a total cock, what would you suggest here to get them to take their "charms" to someone else?

Thanks in advance. I hope yall have good hunting.

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avatar for Alucard
Alucard
11 years ago
I ask them to leave, that I'm not interested in them. [Sorry, sometimes you have to be a little forceful with cockblockers] If that doesn't work I'll move & sit elsewhere or go find another dancer to take back to the VIP right away.
avatar for grand1511
grand1511
11 years ago
Most dancers know to leave if you say "I'm waiting for someone else." I do that even when I'm still scouting the scene.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
11 years ago
Try clamming up and giving them the cold shoulder. Get up and tip other dancers on stage. Go to the men's room and then pick a different table or place to sit. Openly seek out other dancers for dances. Tell her that you do not want to waste her time. That you are not going to buy any dances from her. Tell her to fuck off. Leave and go to another club.
avatar for Lionshare
Lionshare
11 years ago
I had this problem a lot when I started oit, nut now I know just be direct as fuck. If you are a dick while doing it thats fine. Some of them cant take a hint.
avatar for meatstack
meatstack
11 years ago
This here is good advice, and re-affirms what I already know - I sort of do have to be a cock. I'm probably a pretty common case. Been married for 15 years, I'm just looking to see a bunch of different tits. If I'm down for multiple LDs it's from different dancers. If I want to sit with the same woman and hear her sob stories, I'd stay home.

The truth is the wife is really cool about it. She doesn't care where I get hungry, as long as I get dinner at home.
avatar for Jtmonger
Jtmonger
11 years ago
Be nice and simply ask her to go with you to the stage - "lets go tip the girl on stage" stand up and make sure she takes her drink,purse etc with her. Its going to cost you a couple of $ sit for a song giving clock blocking girl a few $ to tuck. Once song is over simply just say thank and you will look for her when she is up next on stage. I have found that this is a less awkward way to let her know to move on and not get the reputation as a complete ass. This is important if you plan on returning to the club.
avatar for meatstack
meatstack
11 years ago
winner winner chicken dinner. get rid of her and girl-on-girl action. Thanks folks.
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
11 years ago
At many clubs, the more attractive dancers only work during peak shifts and times.

When you see a dancer you want a dance from, tell Miss Cling-on you have to go to the bathroom. Come out and go over and start talking to the dancer that interests you.
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
11 years ago
Excusing yourself to use the restroom is usually sufficient to lose her and you don't have to be a dick about it. And if she's still sitting at your table when you come out simply sit somewhere else. That will really drive the message home.
avatar for jester214
jester214
11 years ago
Sadly lopaw some of them will wait outside the fucking bathroom...

If they don't take the hints, tell them you're not interested as directly as possible. Sometimes you need to do that to chase them off.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
11 years ago
Most dancers do take hints pretty fast and many won't even sit with you if you don't give an ok because they asked first. I believe the guys are talking about those times when the dancer doesn't realize the customer is ready for her to leave. I think you don't have to be a dick about it. Just tell her you wanted to talk to some of the other dancers before you leave the club but thanks for stopping by your table and talking. I think most pick up the hint. If they don't, you can get more blunt or direct.
One time I did have a dancer stay at my table and argue with me for 15 whole minutes and then I got up and sat at the stage because she was just being totally disagreeable. That was the only time I remember having to get up and move to get away. I did have one other dancer drag me and my chair about 50 feet across a club towards the lap dance room before I put my feet more firmly down. Sofa chair had wheels. That was very unusual.
avatar for Lone_Wolf
Lone_Wolf
11 years ago
Most often the dancer's that do this are the one's that shouldn't be dancing or are way past their prime and should have retired long ago. It is kind of an intimidation hustle making the PL feel uncomfortable until they get a mercy dance or tip them to go away. Sad really.

I still don't have a good way of dealing with this so, often, this hustle is pretty effective on me.

avatar for azdd
azdd
11 years ago
I completely agree with the advice to be direct, but nice. I usually know in less than 30 seconds if I'm gonna get a dance from someone that plops down in my lap. If I'm not interested, I'll chat for a little bit, but as soon as the current song starts to end I tell them that I appreciate them stopping to talk to me, but I'm not interested in a dance, and I don't want them to miss out on money from other customers. They know if they don't find another lap right then, they risk losing the potential revenue for t least another entire song. This almost always works. The worst, which has only happened to me a couple of times in decades of clubbing, is for the dancer to start whining to me that nobody gets dances from them, and asking why I don't like them. I tell them if they can't handle rejection they are in the wrong line of work. On one of those times I got up and walked out.
avatar for Dolfan
Dolfan
11 years ago
"I'm probably not going to do any dances today, but I'll let you know if I change my mind" almost always works for me. Sometimes I'll throw in something about not trying to get rid of her or something, to make it a bit more obvious that I am trying to do so.

Keep in mind, if you're making the slightest effort not to be an asshole - you're probably way ahead of the curve, nothing you do is likely to cost more than a few bucks to erase.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
11 years ago
How do you deal with sales people? Do you let them take all your time when you are not interested in buying?

She is being rude to you by monopolizing your time; space; and in her hopes; your wallet.

If you would not take a certain type of behavior from any other sales person; you don’t have to take it from her. She is just trying to take your $$$ and your time; and you don’t owe her either.

As others have said; I’ll usually tell them “I’m not getting any dances right now” – or “I just want to chill by myself for a while” – and if that does not work – I’ll get up and walk to another spot in the club.

Many of these dancers live their lives outside the norms of society – so you trying to interact w/ them according to the norms of society (i.e. being polite and patient) will have no effect on them.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
11 years ago
@hotstuff,

What you say makes perfect sense when dealing with sane dancers.

90% of the time; a dancer will leave you alone when you say you do not want any dances.

But there is a *definitely* a small minority like the type the OP described in many if not all clubs where you can say no in multiple ways and they will still not go away – similar to a guy/customer asking for sex; you turning him down; and he keeps on asking (I imagine you have run into these types)

If one SCs enough, they will come across this minority (dancers) more than one would care for.

It looks like you are a dancer – I imagine if you’ve danced long enough that you may have come across some of these whack job dancers?
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
11 years ago
If you do not "control your space", then someone else will. It is one of the single most valuable lessons that you can learn when clubbing regularly. In some of the clubs I visit in some parts of the country, there are girls who will sit there forever if they smell even a hint of weakness. If you don't learn to control your space, you will always be at the mercy of the most aggressive and/or desperate girls in any club that you visit.

Now having said that, there are nicer ways to move them along. If a girl that I am not interested in sits uninvited and is not getting the hint after a few minutes, I smile and let her know, calmly, that I'm sorry, but that I'm looking to chill out by myself for a while. Sometimes they look at me startled, or unsure, at which point I look them firmly in the eye (again smiling and calm) and repeat myself. This virtually always works and I don't often get bad reactions - it is as much about delivery as the message.

As a side note, the problem with "not right now" is that some of them see that as an invitation to come back later and some will even try to wait it out. And "I'm waiting for someone" can backfire if the girl asks who you are waiting for and offers to get her for you, which some of the savvier dancers will do as they know that this line is often BS.

The combination of friendly but firm and direct works out well for me. In most cases, calmness and a smile will allay any bad reactions, but you will inevitably run across a small % of girls who just do not handle rejection well no matter how kindly delivered. When this happens, c'est la vie as it is a small price to pay for not letting a girl who you do not want monopolize valuable club time.
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
11 years ago
Control your space? Does that involve setting up a perimeter with Claymores?
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
11 years ago
When it starts getting out of hand for me, I’ll hire off duty secret service guys and take them to the club w/me in order to control the-perimeter/my-space.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
11 years ago
You *don't* want to be on the inside of a ring of claymore mines either. Not *all* of the shrapnel goes out the front.

Enforcing your space with a giant two handed sword, on the other hand, might be entertaining.
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