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Golden Opportunity?

avatar for likes2look
likes2look
Witness Protection
I have been looking at buying a house lately as interest rates are so low. I came across this lovely 2 bed/ 2 bath Craftsman on a 1.3 acre lot. The best feature of the place, which the real estate listing shockingly fails to list, is that it is right next door to a strip club! I am talking less than 200 yards door to door.

I was thinking that it might go for a reduced price because a lot of people don't want to live close to a strip club. And think of all the time and money a guy could save not needing to drive to the club. I could cancel my cable service too, who needs TV when there are naked girls next door. It might even be possible to rent the spare room to traveling dancers.

Of course, I may also end up flat broke from spending all my time in the club. Also, there may be some additional exposure to the infamous 2am phenomenon. So what do you guys think about living next to the club?

19 comments

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avatar for txtittyfan
txtittyfan
•
13 years ago
You would probably save on water. There will be so many people peeing on your lawn you won't have to water it.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
•
13 years ago
You could probably turn it into a crack house.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
•
13 years ago
"Golden Opportunity?"

For living close to a Strip Club & doing OTC with Dancers? A big YES!! LOL

Buy remember the VERY true Real Estate saying, "Location, Location, Location".

Think about property values. Remember this if you ever want to sell it. NOT everyone would like to live next to a Strip Club.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
•
13 years ago
Well, go ahead and buy it. I'll rent it from ya if you don't live there. LOL
avatar for Club_Goer_Seattle
Club_Goer_Seattle
•
13 years ago
Consider your options wisely. Having worked over 20 years in city planning, with most of that time in zoning, I can tell you that there are always complaints from residents when they live next to, or even near a commercial zone. There will be nights when you don't want to stay up until 2:00 a.m. when the club closes and deal with the traffic and noise until that hour. Some of the potential complaints mentioned by other can be a real nuisance. I sense that if you do buy this house, the first month it'll be a real thrill. After a month, the novelty will have worn off. By the third month, you'll have buyer's remorse.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
•
13 years ago
Damn Club_Goer. If you are gonna get praticle about it. He should check the club's books too. What if the club is about to go belly up? Then what? Somebody buys the building and turns it into a church. There goes the neighborhood. :)
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
•
13 years ago
"Also, there may be some additional exposure to the infamous 2am phenomenon"

Ah, don't worry about. Get yourself a good pump action shotgun, a Glock 17, and a Kevlar vest. Stop those 2 AMers before they happen.

You'll probably be a hero and you'll get free pussy - unless, one of those potentials happens to a boyfriend.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
•
13 years ago
Buying a house is NOT a joking matter. :)
avatar for ButterMan
ButterMan
•
13 years ago
ld like the idea of not having to drive home drunk. But as far as the OTC chances, dancers try to be so discret about that sometimes I don't know if they would want people at the club to see there car park down the street at your house after hours. Sometihing to think about.
avatar for umissedaspot
umissedaspot
•
13 years ago
Maybe if you picket the club to get it closed, you could then sell the house for a nice profit.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
•
13 years ago
If it has an extra room, you could rent it by the hour to strip club patrons who need some time to, uh, wind down after a strenuous afternoon/evening/night of clubbing.
avatar for Club_Goer_Seattle
Club_Goer_Seattle
•
13 years ago
@ Shadowcat: Id rather live next to a strip club than a church. You should've heard the complaints that my department got from people living next to, or near some churches. They're not the peaceful, serene, pastoral setting you might think they are when living close to one!
avatar for gatorfan
gatorfan
•
13 years ago
Buy the strip club and make it a duplex
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
•
13 years ago
Wow! Next door to a strip club! You could hang out at the club every day and never have to worry about getting a DUI. OTC would be easy. I can't think of any drawbacks.
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
•
13 years ago
When you sell it at a profit, you will be helping to kill the legal fiction that SCs lower residential property values. So much for the secondary effects test.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
•
13 years ago
likes,

You HAVE to keep us updated on this one!
avatar for thesamurai
thesamurai
•
13 years ago
Buy the house and start a new career as a pimp/landlord. Rent out the rooms to the menu girls at the club, pay off the fuzz, and sit back and watch that cash flow come in. What a brilliant idea! I can't believe nobody has ever thought of or tried this before!!
avatar for MissionaryMan
MissionaryMan
•
13 years ago
I'd rathter have a friend that owns a house next to a strip club, than own it myself. If you buy it, can I be your friend.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
•
13 years ago
“Buy the house and start a new career as a pimp/landlord.”

“What a brilliant idea! I can't believe nobody has ever thought of or tried this before!!”

Wouldn’t this brilliant idea also be an illegal idea? :)
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