The Flip Side 2nd try
This could have been an extension of JasonTminus' topic of trusting Strippers look at the other side for a moment. My guess is that the rule among dancers is very concrete : Don't ever trust a customer beyond the door to the club. Note the rule says nothing about OTC - it's about trusting - or not.
There is a certain cross current in this type of dancing. On the one hand it can afford a measure of financial support but the symbolic nature of the service creates a dichotomy between intimacy and physical gratification (the cusotmer) and for the most part feigned intimacy and mercenary gratification (the dancers) on the other.
Toss in a theme that I have heard forever: "I have been screwed over so many times that I will NEVER trust anyone again!" and you have a powerful series of past events operating on the dancers that most probably the customers don't get and the dancer won't truly reveal as that would require some level of trust(and probably some pain). Trust is derivative of experience. You can't get some at a company workshop on teambuilding. It happens based on what one person does to another over time. And once lost generally it is a long time before you see it again. Maybe never.
JT- no offense to you but don't you see a certain lack of candor in the approach you describe. Yes there are parts of the process that a very straight-forward but what about the dance before leaving? That doesn't sound as transparent as other parts.
The main point is if Trust is derived over time, a one shot strategy may be productive of results but not trust and That is what turns the discussion on its head: Should a dancer trust a customer. As far as this long-time customer goes (at least for himself) "Hell, No!" If dancers trust me without knowing me then they risk much and gain little in terms of what I may or may not have to offer. Trust without experience is like skydiving without a chute.
And JT-, thanks for a great topic and some insight.
There is a certain cross current in this type of dancing. On the one hand it can afford a measure of financial support but the symbolic nature of the service creates a dichotomy between intimacy and physical gratification (the cusotmer) and for the most part feigned intimacy and mercenary gratification (the dancers) on the other.
Toss in a theme that I have heard forever: "I have been screwed over so many times that I will NEVER trust anyone again!" and you have a powerful series of past events operating on the dancers that most probably the customers don't get and the dancer won't truly reveal as that would require some level of trust(and probably some pain). Trust is derivative of experience. You can't get some at a company workshop on teambuilding. It happens based on what one person does to another over time. And once lost generally it is a long time before you see it again. Maybe never.
JT- no offense to you but don't you see a certain lack of candor in the approach you describe. Yes there are parts of the process that a very straight-forward but what about the dance before leaving? That doesn't sound as transparent as other parts.
The main point is if Trust is derived over time, a one shot strategy may be productive of results but not trust and That is what turns the discussion on its head: Should a dancer trust a customer. As far as this long-time customer goes (at least for himself) "Hell, No!" If dancers trust me without knowing me then they risk much and gain little in terms of what I may or may not have to offer. Trust without experience is like skydiving without a chute.
And JT-, thanks for a great topic and some insight.
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Example- A customer says "Let me go get the rest of the money from the Atm up the street that doesn't charge a surcharge. I'll be right back". The fact is that I can't trust him or anyone for that matter in the club when they say that. However, based on my experiences with him and with those customers that have similar traits as him, I can make an almost always accurate guess as to how he will behave.
I will also add that there are many trustworthy men that enter the stripclub. Unfortunately they dont leave that way. By the time they meet me, they have been ripped off, cheated, and put down by a number of girls, who no doubt have had the same thing happen to them by horrible customers. It's a cycle and everyday another one gets pulled in. Dancers like me have to fight for respect and trustworthy customers have to swim through all the jaded girls to find a good dancer and some just don't make it.