Worst Beginning for a Reviw
harrydave
New Jersey
"It was a dark and stormy night." The worst opening sentence for a book from a contest long ago. I perused recent reviews, and selected some real gems. My commentary reflects my mood today.
1) "Everything you've heard about this club is true--it's the best club on the planet." [Translation: I went to Adelita's and got shagged.]
2) "I'd read some bad reviews about Fantasy Showgirls and decided to check it out for myself on a Saturday night." [It was either that, or get a root canal.]
3)"Sinners was actually the first strip club I'd been to (besides one I stopped in that seemed bottom of the barrel)." [Ok, so it was the second club, or maybe it was the third.]
4)"Plenty of parking." [That is always my biggest concern; will there be enough parking.]
5) "Let me just start out by saying that the phrase "hit or miss" applies to this club more than any I've ever been to." [Hope springs eternal in the savage breast.]
6)"Went to Club 390 after a disappointing visit to Club 0." [It was infinitely better; or maybe undefined.]
7) "Went to this club when I got back into town, Its one of the better clubs in town in my mind, kind of a crappy outside and inside." [At least I think I went there.]
8) "I was enticed into visiting this club by a couple of spicy tuscl reviews." [Ok, man up; who posted the spicy reviews?]
9) "Went here last night with a male friend after the Ke$ha show." [Dude, you're gay.]
10) "My, oh, my.." [Actually loved this opening sentence. Great hook and I wanted to read the whole review.]
On the other hand, farmerart gets the award for best written reviews in the past few days. Well done!
1) "Everything you've heard about this club is true--it's the best club on the planet." [Translation: I went to Adelita's and got shagged.]
2) "I'd read some bad reviews about Fantasy Showgirls and decided to check it out for myself on a Saturday night." [It was either that, or get a root canal.]
3)"Sinners was actually the first strip club I'd been to (besides one I stopped in that seemed bottom of the barrel)." [Ok, so it was the second club, or maybe it was the third.]
4)"Plenty of parking." [That is always my biggest concern; will there be enough parking.]
5) "Let me just start out by saying that the phrase "hit or miss" applies to this club more than any I've ever been to." [Hope springs eternal in the savage breast.]
6)"Went to Club 390 after a disappointing visit to Club 0." [It was infinitely better; or maybe undefined.]
7) "Went to this club when I got back into town, Its one of the better clubs in town in my mind, kind of a crappy outside and inside." [At least I think I went there.]
8) "I was enticed into visiting this club by a couple of spicy tuscl reviews." [Ok, man up; who posted the spicy reviews?]
9) "Went here last night with a male friend after the Ke$ha show." [Dude, you're gay.]
10) "My, oh, my.." [Actually loved this opening sentence. Great hook and I wanted to read the whole review.]
On the other hand, farmerart gets the award for best written reviews in the past few days. Well done!
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11 comments
Are you still in Oman? I am back in Canada.
Anyway, no offence (well, not a lot) intended to anyone. Sasha, I was honed in on beginning sentences. Nice to know you like to patronize clubs. My wife is an ex stripper and she likes to visit as well. Our tastes are completely different. I like the small-breasted, brunette spinners and she likes blonde girls with enhanced boobs.
I'm still in Oman, farmerart. In the past month have discovered the "scene" here, which centers around the tourist hotel bars. Not strip clubs, for sure; still, there are ladies trying to get guys to part with their money for a little sexual excitement. Ah crap, I probably offended Sasha with that one, too!
...and a feisty one at that!
Well done.
Pictures! Remember, we're all perverts, Sasha, and we don't mind if you hide your face, as long as everything else is displayed. :))