Things Dancers should know about Customers
davevjr
California
1) Guys spend money just to come in. We are not responsible for your salary.
On the money issue, I think you girls should be more understanding. For the majority of guys it takes us much longer to earn it then it does to spend it on a lap dance. So if the guy tips you while you're dancing, or elects to take you to do lap dance, you should understand he thinks you stand out above the rest of the girls he's seen and wants to spend money on you instead of the other girls. For a lot of guys the stage dance is a try-out for who they're going to get a lap dance from. No matter how much you complain, tipping is always optional, so be nice!
2) Guys that Want Extras
If you are not that girl, explain it to them nicely. you can be forceful with it if you want, but the better way to handle is to nicely tell him that you don't offer whatever service he requested that is beyond your boundary. He might buy dances from you anyway if you're nice about it. Also it's important to say this contrary to what I have read on many strip club boards from strippers, some strippers do offer bj's and intercourse in VIP areas at some clubs. The idea that this is available is common knowledge. if you guys ask you for a bj that means he probably got one from the club you work at and thus is under the false impression that all girls in the club provide this service. If you don't then just tell him no, not in the offended tone.
The Main Points to Remember
1) We don't like being rejected, we will not tip you for it.
2) Every penny we spend, even it's buying the drink minimum, paying a cover charge, it's to see the you girls. Most guys will expect value before they tip a dancer on stage. That can be anything though. It doesn't matter if it's you sticking your titties in our faces or just the fact that you're so hot you really impressed us. Both of these are considered value. Simply being on stage is expected, it's not our fault you don't get the cover charge.
3) We realize this your job and you have bills to pay. That doesn't make you special. Everyone has bills.
4) I believe you are entitled to set up whatever limits on activity you see fit. No matter because of the club policy or your own personal preference. Understand we don't know your limits until we buy a dance. The first time I ever went to strip club I was immediately told never touch the girls during a dance but they can touch me. After staying there getting a few lap dances, some girls wanted me touch them, others didn't say they had a preference. The limits on dances have always been different for each club and girl I got lap dances from.
5) Everyone's ideas of what makes a decent tip is different, it is largely based on their income. Be nice to the average Joe, chances are there are way more of them then celebrities who make it rain coming to your club.
In essence we expect minimum of before we pay you anything.
1) be nice to us.
2) you gotta be hot
3) personal attention
After these things most guys will tip you.
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33 comments
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I do think guys sitting at the rail should tip a dollar per set minimum.
VERY odd
IMHO if you can't afford a few singles for each girl that dances onstage because of the cost of the cover and drink minimum, you may want to think about whether a SC is the best place to spend your time and very limited entertainment budget.
I do however agree that if a girl doesn't perform extras, especially at a club where extras are known to be offered by some dancers, the girl should be firm but polite in explaining that it is a service she does not offer.
As an analogy; SCing can be seen as the equivalent of shopping – when a chick geos shopping; she does a lot of looking w/o necessarily buying – it’s not as if she buys something in every store in the mall that she goes into just b/c she visited that store – so is a custy in a SC; he is “shopping” for what he likes and suits him and will/should spend his $$$ on what suits him; not what suits the club/dancer (or the store owner in the analogy).
Dancers may rake in money at a greater rate per minute than guys do in most sorts of jobs. But overall, more guys make more money in their lives than girls do.
No one said SC's were cheap. If you don't like it, then play with civilians, or start a counter cultural movement and try to change the rules of engagement between men and women. But don't bring a bad attitude into SC's.
SJG
1) it's not adversarial it's just a headsup on how most guys think
2) guys don't make more money then strippers unless they have an advanced degree. But the crux of what I am saying and i didn't say outright but I will now for you and everyone else who didn't get the point. with good salesmenship the sky is the limit, not true with a regular which is most of the strippers clientele. also it largely depends on the area. A lot of strip clubs are in working class nieghborhoods, Then means hourly wage earners. which is the reason I wrote this article on how this people think about there money and how it relates what they think they deserve.
3) The last comment you made, there is no difference between a striipper and a civilian woman as you put it other then their looks. A woman is a woman and she will get what she can. There is no need for guys to surrender before playing the game. what someone is willing to spend is thier own business.
I am all for fairness for the working man. And FWIW, I am quite certain that there have been times that I have lived poorer than just about anyone else on this board. One of the ways one deals with this is, by staying out of strip clubs. If you walk in there without money, or looking like you don't have money, it will not be a good experience.
You don't actually need to have mountains of money. And you can be tight with it. I usually am. But when you want to engage, you have to contribute it freely. Women are expensive.
I am all for making economic and social changes. But the place to start applying pressure is not on the women who work in strip clubs.
And like I said, if you don't like getting your wallet sucked dry by a stripper ( bad girl ) then deal with civilians ( good girls ).
Sorry, but I think you guys are the one's who have a hard time accepting it the way it really is.
We can and should work to make changes. But putting pressure on the women is not going to work.
SJG
But again, the remedy and the path to greater fairness are not to put pressure on the women.
SJG
.it is my assertion is a really between strippers and civlians. I have dated some really hot women who are just as hot as any stripper. I am not a guy who can get them whenever I want but it has happened. There is no difference between them other then the fact that one is a stripper by profession. They both have an attitude that a man has to earn them. Earn them impress them in some way. For a civilian it doesn't always equal giving them money or buying things but it is the same dynamic at work. The reason this happens because men always allow it. to desperate for the attention of a female to act like a man. I have known grown men who are still nervous around a woman they are attracted to.
as for me: I only what I plan to spend, but I pick the girl that appeals to me most. I don't even bother there dumbass drink minimums, At most I order 1 and nurse it forever. which works fine up until I get lapdance. I pretty much only go to nude clubs. I can spot the High Milage really easily so i always Get my moneys worth. Only had a problem once in Vegas when the girl demanded a tip before the dance started. If women that of it as strictly business then the priviledge attitude of I'm a hottie goes away and they make more money anda I have more fun!
Civilians commonly enjoy dinner, drinks, tickets, gifts and then MAYBE, just maybe, will they share their affections.
Wives commonly demand financial security 24/7/365 with even fewer, less adventurous physical pleasures rendered. When I think of the strange I could have rented by the hour instead of the $1,000s spent on wives birthdays, anniversaries and vacations and, in return, received one good missionary lay in a hotel room, it sickens.
I know i am a cynical fuck, but it is just what I've seen with my own eyes. It just seems that strippers are more truthful about the exchange without pretense.
I have seen what your are talking first hand, but never been a victim of it.what you are actually experiencing is the same attitude. The comment i about women believing you need to earn them applies to what you described. what I should add is most civilian women greatly overestimate their value. Some of these women believe a man is lucky just to be with them because thats what they have told their entire lives and to evidence that men pursue them, we are always the chasers even in the strip club. ALl of what you said is true but it is because of the underlying attitude men and women have towards each other
I was at a club about 3 weeks ago (Crusing Chubby's, WI Dells). I was at the tip rail and was tipping dancers as they were dancing. During the rotation....One stripper came over and picked up my tip... Looked at me and said... I am fucking naked and this is all you are tipping me! I get this for only being topless. I had $4 out there. She did nothing at all... didn't dance, talk to me or anything. She just moved to the pole infront of me (rotation). I just about grabbed my tip back and told her to fuck off.
You see... The dancers sometimes forget that it is OUR MONEY....and WE decide how we want to spend it. They forget that it is THEIR JOB... to dance, talk, and be personable. To give a "fantasy". The money isn't just expected.
Now some of you might say I am an asshole or a cheap ass. But that is not the case. I tip generously and sometimes too much. Lets just put it this way... it that BITCH would have just walked over did some half assed ass shaking infront of me... I would not be complaining. But first thing out of her mouth is bitching because of the tip amount. FUCK HER and all strippers like her.
Sorry for the rant but that is what I think is the gist of this article.
Had a terrible dance recently and this was the first time I have been ripped off but then when the dancer demands the money before a dance and no one else has ever before its a clear sign "do not get the dance".
But as far as trying to send a message to dancers, as davejvr seems want to do, I don't go along with his message. Lots of stuff is unfair about the economics of our society, and we need to change it. But it is out of this that we are finding these girls willing to do so much for us. They are not the place to direct one's criticisms.
SJG