Ballin69
Comments by Ballin69
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
OrangeLover: yeah I definitely need to take a break. Any idea how long is enough? In the past, I've gone about ~6 months in between visits, but in my visits I will go crazy. Like 10 girls in 2 days crazy. Hopefully I find a long term partner in the next 6 months, I don't want to be sexually frustrated while I'm dating either.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Ishmael: agreed about the hedonic treadmill. I'm familiar with that term, and agreed about the therapy advice. I'm not necessarily volunteering right now, but I am going out of my way to participate in my hobbies with a larger group other than just by myself or with my friends who I already know.
Which expectation do I have that is unrealistic or unhealthy?
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
ilb - I'm not sure what you mean by drop the puta shit. I am always respectful to them, and have never even had a disagreement with a single one of them, despite all of the posts about ROBs. The problem is, they don't speak English, and even if they did, whatever connection they would make with me wouldn't be for real. It would be for money.
The power dynamic thing I think is real. I LOVE the power of being able to choose any puta I want. But I hate that I have to pay. In my ideal world, I would get to choose whatever girl I wanted and make her my wife, without having to pay. I understand that's now how reality works though.
I do want a chick that is really horny for me. I've had it before, but I want it for forever. I understand there will be a trade off, but to me those tradeoffs seem worth it.
I definitely want meaning in my life, not just a bunch of pleasures. And you're right, humans are silly in the ways you mentioned.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
rick dugan- I think you're a little harsh on your assessment, but some of your points did resonate. I am an insecure fuck who seeks the solace of putas 100%. I don't think my dates think I'm creepy though. Some of them still text me from out of state. For the most part, they think I'm fun and handsome, or at least that is how I see it.
The part about real girls that scares me is that I'm never 100% sure they want to be kissed, or fucked, etc. etc. Putas on the other hand: 100% they want $100 for sex. That takes a lot of the fear out of the equation.
I do kind of wallow in excuses, but I also think that wallowing is part of the process. I think I have emotions to process, and that processing them will make room for new ones. i.e. dealing with a potential rejection, pushing past anxiety etc.
Also, totally agreed about the gym. I don't lift to be in shape. I am very in shape already and I lift primarily for the mental benefits, and I get way more mental benefits by power lifting, as you suggested.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
CJKent: I agree with you about happiness and bravery. I hope and believe that some day I will overcome the anxiety, similar to how I overcame anxiety to tip putas and grab some tits lol.
I still believe in loving relationships. The part of my lizard brain that tells me to find a girl is hurting because I haven't had that need satisfied is so long. I believe girls are the same way and there is someone out there looking for a long connection with me. Maybe we disagree on what a loving relationship is, but I believe they exist.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Mark: I have had a long term, serious relationship that ended just short of getting engaged. But on the dating apps, I do gravitate toward the tourists who are in town. Maybe I have a commitment issue, but all I want is a steady relationship again lol.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Booji Boy: yeah, my therapist thinks I could approach randoms if I want to, but if it brings too much stress that cycles back into negative emotions, then the best place to start would be starting to share my hobbies with a group rather than by myself, so I am working on that to branch out of my social circle. Then I'll revisit walking up to random girls and talking to them for no reason other than that I find them attractive.
Agreed about relationships. I've only been in one, but sex was a huge reason why I was in that relationship. We had lots and lots of amazing sex, but I didn't like her *that* much for the mundane stuff. She was alright, but wouldn't have been my first pick. For sex though, she was my first pick for sure.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Tetradon: I bet you and I do have a lot in common. I grew up pretty sheltered, with overbearing parents who couldn't protect me when I was away at school. I'm not Catholic, and don't feel like I was ever sheltered from a beliefs perspective, but I can see how certain upbringings would need to be unlearned in today's society.
discussion comment
2 years ago
rugrat
Roaming the USA
I'm not sure what to do on the weekends, but I only paid $10 for 8 hours on a week night.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Kristopher: I appreciate the input. I am actually already in therapy :) but for issues that seem indirectly related to paying for sex. I dealt with being bullied in middle school. I was always very small, and went though very late puberty to be taller than average and even play a sport at the NCAA level. But I think being small for so long and bullied for a number of years left an emotional scar on me. I don't like people as much as I did from before all this trauma, and have a deep fear of humiliation, and I almost never reach out to make new friends (or meet new girls). This was never a problem in high school or college because people were always reaching out to me (and to some extent girls were reaching out too). Now that I'm graduated, I don't have a nice cushy social environment like that and I have to go way out of my way to make friends and meet girls. So, I'm on tinder and pay for sex rather than just existing and talking to girls who end up in my social circle.
Part of my problem now is that I'm not sure if paying for sex is part of the solution or part of the problem. I certainly think the outcome has been better than being celibate for the last 2 years, but I'd prefer if I had a meaningful relationship right now.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
623: what kind of work does that entail? For the past 2+ years (since my big breakup), I've been in the gym almost every day. I've been going out and making new friends in a new city, and going on dates from dating apps. Also, I'm in therapy. I'm not sure I like myself, and I'm at best indifferent about the women I'm paying to fuck me. I hate that I have to pay (even though mathematically it is nothing to me, I just hate the power dynamic). In my real life dates, I have really liked the women I've been on dates with, but have always been too scared to escalate it even to a kiss.
Obviously I am some problems that are still unresolved on that front, but I'm working on them. Do you have any other recommendations for what kind of work I need to be doing to find a wife that it will work out with long term?
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
ilbbaicnll: I'm not sure I want an LTR. All I know is that something is missing right now, even with sex. I've been in an amazing LTR that turned sour before, so I definitely get what you're saying. I know it might happen to me again. I think I do want kids, but I think the only reason I want them is because there doesn't seem to be any other point to life other than hedonism, but the high from acts of hedonism is so small and unable to be savored, especially compared to how much of life is just empty and meaningless.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Booji boy: I think I am learning right now that sex is not a replacement for love. I grew up in the era of social media and tik tok and have consumed a lot of content that places a heavy emphasis on sex and little emphasis on love.
I think I am lacking social skills. I'm scared to approach random girls, and I'm not sure why. The one long relationship I've been in was started by the girl, and all of my dates have been spawned from dating apps. I'm disappointed in the number of dates I've been on, but not with the quality of them. I suck at breaking the ice. The first time I went to HK even I was terrified to tip the girls and feel their goodies; now that anxiety is gone, but I still have anxiety about striking up conversations with random girls, unless they talk to me first.
I don't have what I would call female friends. I have female acquaintances though. As in, girls that I talk to regularly in my social circle, but in no way would I feel safe sharing feelings with them the same way I can with my male friends. Do people actually have female friends that they can be vulnerable around who aren't sexual partners? I've lived 20+ years of life without any of those female friends.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Johnny: I appreciate your point about improving myself. I am deep down the self improvement rabbit hole. I am very active and have a nice body. I'm not like a body builder, but I am fit. I wasn't blessed with genes that will let me get any girl I want though. I'm attractive, but not attractive enough to have any girl I want, except when I'm at an establishment like HK. I love that power trip of being able to have any girl I want, and I want a lot of them.
Have you had relationships with regular girls and sugar babies? Were sugar babies close enough to the real thing? I have only ever had a real relationship and then lots of 30 min sex.
discussion comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Wow, a lot of good feeback. I'll do my best to address all of it. No, I'm not trolling, as you can see based on my other articles and reviews.
CJKent: I do feel a little bit like I'm chasing the dragon, except I don't have an urge to go back again right now. I don't think love falls into the same category as Santa; I've been in love before. I like your point about being able to afford it. I can comfortably afford it financially, but I'm unsure what the emotional costs are. Is there a way to know how this will affect me down the line?
I know you say you don't believe in love, but how does a sugar baby or ATF make you feel different than a high end escort does?
article comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Jusflor, what are your recs for Russia? Moscow? Any establishments in particular that you'd recommend?
article comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
@Mongo1964 -- that's a fair take. I would love if my Spanish or Portuguese were fluent so I could really hold meaningful conversations with the girls. If you're already fluent in Spanish, that would be a huge pro in comparison to non Spanish speaking countries. In Germany, the girls spoke good English, and it really transformed the experience when compared to establishments where English was more rare and broken.
Not all of Rio is safe, but if you visit Rio, you will have to go out of your way to find the dangerous stuff. In TJ, if you walk a couple blocks from HK, you can find danger. And the nice parts of Rio are much, much nicer than the nice parts of TJ in my limited experience. Comparing Ipanema or Leblon to Playas de Tijuana is night and day, not that either are actually dangerous of course.
article comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
JAprufrock, don't get me wrong, Colombian women are indeed beautiful, and the mongering scene is still great, but it's not #1 when compared to the other great destinations in the world. Steph Curry is a great basketball player, but he's not Michael Jordan.
That being said, flying to Colombia will just get you a B-rate TJ, except in a nice city to live in. Brazil and Germany on the other hand, offer experiences that HK does not.
You will not get Brazilian service at HK, and you will not get an FKK experience at HK. Next time you're in Europe, take a cheap flight over to Germany. If you're ever in SA or just want to visit Rio, try the termas girls. Only you know what experiences you will value :)
review comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
Yeah I was disappointed too. From what I've read, the lineup used to be better than HK pre-pandemic. You will find girls that look like Romanian porn stars, but it's definitely not the entire club. I'd estimate there were 5-10 stunners, depending on how picky you are, so if you're going for a week, expect to do a good amount of repeating with your favorite girls. At HK, it would take me at least 20 arribas before I decide to repeat, unless I get exceptional service from a chica. Also, I'd say the service is better than HK on average (especially with BBBJ being standard at 100E).
review comment
2 years ago
Ballin69
50/30 means 50E for 30 minutes, with no BBBJ, kissing etc. 100/30 means 100E for 30 minutes, comes with BBBJ and kissing etc. Basically, some girls go for more volume at 50/30 (maybe 20% of them will do this), but the rest only do the 100/30 deal. I paid 100/30 for all of them because I wanted the BBBJ, so I can't comment on if the service is actually much different for 50E less.
review comment
3 years ago
Ballin69
For the question about the room: it was nothing special. It was small, had a (queen? maybe king?) bed and not any room to walk around. Had a nice shower though.
I communicated in the front room using google translate. Some of the girls have basic English skills.
review comment
3 years ago
Ballin69
Appreciate your reply tahoecruz. I read some of your articles and reviews and sounds like you're an adventurous mad man (in a good way). I'd like to think I'm the same, but no way are my balls big enough to cross into CJ lol. Some reviews I read about TJ recommended staying on the same street as HK. I know that the clubs you mentioned are on the same block, but not the same street. Should I feel safe on the entire block?
My Spanish is better than what you're probably imagining (I am from SD after all). i.e. I can understand and speak slowly at the level of a toddler lmao, only needed google translate a couple times. That said, I'm whiter than what you're imagining for sure lol.
I'm probably not the type to fuck a girl from one of those establishments unless I stumble upon a real gem, but I am definitely down for the cultural experience.
Looks like there are plenty of reviews for the FKKs on tuscl, but I'm having a harder time figuring out what to do in South America.
review comment
3 years ago
Ballin69
My assumptions could certainly be incorrect. I'm just speaking to my experiences and have never encountered a ROB. It's totally possible that I've just gotten lucky and the next time I go I'll get ripped off.
It sounds like the advice that is getting the most criticism is the paying up front part. This review is definitely written by a gringo tourist who is so white that not being marked as a gringo tourist would require fluent Spanish.
Feel free to post (or PM) any clubs you think I should try to get more experience. Is HK not the best in the world? I have a trip to Germany planned, and a trip to South America planned with the intention of broadening by experience.
review comment
3 years ago
Ballin69
At the border I literally told them I was going to Zona Norte, so either the border crossing rules you mentioned don't exist, or aren't enforced. If it is a scam, how should I avoid it in the future?
I have brought over 10 chicas back to the hotel in my career from HK, and not one has failed to perform anything short of amazing. YMMV. The competition in TJ is stiff, and if word gets around that a girl is a ROB, I assume she'll get dropped by HK and picked up by a lesser establishment. Not saying they don't exist, just saying I've never encountered it.
These girls make a lot of $ off of their regulars, and in my experience they view every new lay as a potential lead for a new reg. Yeah the $100 is a ton of money to them in TJ, but what they really want is a handful of customers that will reliably pay $500+ every month.
Good point on the negotiating. I've never negotiated anything outside the norm other than a 3-some once. Never had a problem but also never wanted anything that wasn't included.
Agreed on the jizz boy tipping. There is no way I'm doing it correctly in the event that there are multiple jizz boys.
review comment
3 years ago
Ballin69
Someone asked when the tourist visa became necessary: I have no idea. My first time ever crossing the border was in March 2021 when I got the visa, and covid was still in full swing. I haven't crossed again since May. I will say having the visa made my life stress free at the border.
1) Show Visa
2) let through
No harassing questions, no follow up questions etc. $30 is pretty steep though and if anyone has insight on what I can say next time to avoid forking over $30, it'd be much appreciated...