Reviews by PhantomGeek

It had been about a year since the last time I was at Dream Girls. Despite the money I spent and what groping there was, it was still a very unsatisfying night. The topper of…

Next up on the hit parade -- tit parade? -- was the Tiger Tail. After the complete bust at Just Enuff, I wanted/needed to gamble on the quest for titties. A groggy and grumpy GPS took…

Instead of pushing on to Minneapolis like any sensible person would've been doing, I continued the quest for pretty titty. And, man, was I disappointed. Not because it was a bikini bar (my first time…

Tuesday about noon, I had just finished chowing down at a Bob Evans and, facing a 600-mile drive back to Minneapolis, I was bound and determined to just hit the road and go. Well, yeah,…

In the wee hours of the morning, somewhere on my 600-mile drive from Indianapolis to Minneapolis, some stupid, stupid part of my brain urged me to check out as many clubs along the way as…

After an overpriced and very disappointing half hour or so at Jaguars, I headed down the road to Jiggles. Please don't ask me why; you'll find any number of mentions of me banging my head…

Next up on the hit parade of strip joints was Jaguars, formerly known as the Harem House, also known as the Scare 'Em Harem. Now that's just plain mean. Once upon a time -- maybe…

I wanted to finish off my visit to Indy right, so after a couple of movies (yeah, I go to movies even on vacation, even when I can be doing just about anything else), I…

It was a Friday night, about 10:30. I skipped out on a show -- just really didn't feel like sitting in a loud crowd -- so I just started walking around downtown. Soon, the Red…

This review covers two Friday nights in a row (okay, considering I got there about 1:15 in the morning, it'd be technically Saturday). A Not-so-Nutshell Description of the Place: Large, well-lit parking lot with a…

I was at this club once before, back in 2009. It was a nice enough club then; could've used a coat of paint and a few other things, but it really wasn't bad; pretty much…

After leaving Scores, sometime after 3 in the morning, I set out on foot back to my hotel (yeah, probably not among the brightest of ideas). A driver from Scores had followed me down and…

My last night in the Twin Cities, I felt like hitting a strip club but really didn't want to go downtown, not with the prices they charge -- so I hit the KOD, which is…

My first mistake of the night was telling the guy who flags down cabs at my hotel that I wanted to go to Chica Bonitas. I figured being up front wouldn't hurt. Boy, was I…

This review is actually going to cover two nights, Monday and Wednesday. Monday I got there about 12:30am (okay, technically Tuesday), Wednesday a little after 10pm. And on a side note, I'm not entirely sure…

It'd been several years since I was last at the Lamplighter, and, well, not much has changed. The hours are a bit different (probably thanks to Covid) -- 2pm to 9:45pm. At least that's what…

This review will actually cover two visits -- Friday late night and Saturday afternoon. I've visited the KOD periodically since the 90s, and even though it had been a good ten years since my last visit,…

I was in the Twin Cities for a long overdue vacation -- far, far too long -- and something I wanted to do was hit some of the old haunts, Dreamgirls being one of them.…

Back in the '90s, back when it was Scheik's, I used to hang out at this place -- a lot. It was all class back then, lots of wood and brass and marble, beautiful women…

Here I am, sitting on an old folding chair, fidgeting, nervous, first time at one of these meetings. I'm not alone. There are a bunch of other guys here, too, some look like they just…

Back in the '80s, that corner of Hennepin and 5th Street wasn't among the friendliest. I remember one time, just walking along, minding own business, and a guy in front of Augie's shouted at me,…

It's been a few years since I've been to the Northern. It's a nice enough club for this desolate area of the country, but it is a bit pricier, too much for this market, in…

This review covers two visits to Brad’s, the first very late on a Tuesday night, the next on a Monday afternoon. After an hour or two at the Classy Chassis, I headed straight for Brad’s. It…

It had been a few years since my last visit to the Classy Chassis (I live close to a thousand miles away, so regular visits aren't too likely). After reading about the remodeling, I figured…

I've been to this club before, and I really should know better. It's not that it's a bad club -- hardly -- it's just that it can cost -- a lot -- especially when you're…