Comments by tuscl12345

They "wipe your windshield and check your oil" at a Full Service gas station. Got it?

Everything in the review is accurate, but it seems like the reviewer was expecting something else, and that's fine. PH is a comfy, 'local' place. Girls here are definitely "women," as in MILF and beyond. Friendly, GFE is a good description, but with good mileage. Also, it's best as a daytime, not evening, spot. The language he heard is Portugese, which can sound like Russian mixed with Spanish, but there are no Russians here and generally no Eastern Euros either. The Brazilians know just why everyone is here, and they work hard to please. VIP here generally means just going to the back to any of the private rooms with a door, vs. a barside grope. I think your girl invented something they don't really have, which is an upgraded 30-min VIP at a high price. That's not gen. done here. Never seen the bathroom out of order before. It's not a dive, but it's not posh. You will enjoy PH, but it's not anything like the glitzy Golden Gent's Club.

Similar upfront tip shit from Luna. After being told 'no thanks' for the extras, she just turns off and says "I'll just stand over here." Avoid like the plague.

StripperTipper: Crystal's a snowbird, though don't know where. She might not be seen again until Spring.

The overall ratings are key, even if they're just a starting point. Going to a town with 20 clubs, you know to read the reviews of five clubs and skip the ones where you'll be overcharged, underserved, or just generally left wishing you hadn't gone. Why leave them out, especially when there's enough data in TUSCL to make them (generally) useful? The overall ratings are essential place to start. The only change I'd suggest is having the ratings computed from reviews that are within the last 12-24 months. Places change. But Founder, that quick sizing-up of places, along with a local map, made for efficient and useful decisions. Please bring 'em back!

No shill. I've contributed 181 reviews of 84 different clubs. Just comparing what is still a favorite place (down the street) to a very different setting here.

Not my experience there at all. Need more identification than "older Latina." Maybe she was hesitant in the couch dance area, but the VIP here is very very VIP. Or maybe you found a ROB that I haven't seen.

Very nice, BillJohnson! Very nice indeed! We need this kind of creativity and effort. Applause! Kind of ironic that the guy who didn't get the Gilligan reference was "Minnow." Ballpark has its place, but you won't find Ginger here, and Mary Ann would die if she even heard a description of the place. It's closer to, maybe, if the Skipper was a tranny with open sores and a really bad drug habit. What's the best feature OF BP? The crackwhores working the stage, or the light-up couch, or the tiny scary bathroom, or the layer of smoke over everything, or...? Eventually, we all forget about that stuff and just follow the very horny caterpillar.

Hey, Papi, I'm hurt, man! You're one of my favorite reviewers (and commenters), you almost always adding something useful to the conversation. I think you took this review way too seriously. Or I got you on a bad day. Papi, take me back!! The aim here was to offer an informative update on a place that's been the subject of many, many conversations on this board, with prices, names, times to go, and layout. The discussion lately has been about the changes in attitude and permissiveness, and that's what I wrote about. As for the snarkiness at the end of the review, I'm sick of seeing desertscrub and others rant because someone said something good about a place, or it didn't repeat each and every detail. We're writing reviews of personal experiences here, not checking off the list from the health inspection. Every review does not need every detail. Really, it's OK if we have to read a couple of reviews to get all the facts and prices. But.... you need details, folks? Dances are $30, for 4 minutes in a room with a door (feet are visible from outside, as the door doesn't reach the floor). There's a soft bench inside the room, too. Best time to go is daytime, noon to before 5pm. Shift change usually dead. Mixed reviews on the evenings. Best experiences seem to be the Brazilian gals on day time shift. Until recently, it was a very relaxed and permissive place (no FS, but lots of fun). Legal troubles from one ex-dancer have cooled things down considerably. Some girls left, and others are running scare. And the presence of baby wipes serves as an indicator of how messy things are likely to get. Their absence is seen as a 'cooling down' of the activities inside the room. The club website is usually pretty accurate in telling you who's working that day. It's updated regularly. Back to the regulars: I'm not saying everything is just like it was. But things are picking up. Remember that this has happened before. And I do believe we have to keep the girls working to make sure things don't tank completely. So don't stay home. And no, it wasn't Alexandra, far as I know. Finally, much appreciate the props from the locals who liked the review. Trying to share here, folks. Can't we all just get along?

Amen, Gman! Not enough details, eh King? Not sure why there are guys on here who want every review to include the price of beer, the dimensions of the room (in metric, please), and the make and model of every car parked in the lot. We really don't need to hear what shape the bar is in each and every review. If someone says "go on Fridays, that's the best day" or "stay away from Amber, she'll short your dances," then they've provided something particularly useful, and which other members can use to improve their visit (or choice not to visit at all). Let's use some common sense, huh? "Not enough details" is for a review that doesn't provide others with anything useful or actionable.

Da, Sandra! She's great. Now, how do we get those partitions raised? I think the "way back" booths were $40, which is definitely a lot. But still worth it.

One more time to our resident asshole, Desert Scrub. This is a real review. Just like you're a real asshole. Place gets a good score so you say it's a fake review? Please, stop bothering us all and go find yourself a new hobby. Or just get the F off this board. You just waste everyone's time. Add'l details: Use of the VIP is $1.2 large to the house. One large seems to be doing just fine for the performer, and I'd guess that's pretty generous.  As to Brazilians vs. Americans, anyone in NJ can tell you the Brazilians are much, much more accommodating and free with their activities. Buy American might be great for a car, but some things are just made to be imported. And Brazil's strippers just might be their most successful and coveted export.

BYOB clubs in the East usually offer higher mileage that clubs with a liquor license. They have the advantage of not having to be under the watchful eye of state liquor authorities, and they're not constantly threatened by a license that can be yanked. So the clubs that don't serve alcohol usually serve a better dance. Given the choice between beer and boobies, I'll choose boobies. I mean, after all, I can touch the beer at home!

In a room where every girl is naked, the sexiest one is the one with clothes on!

Worth noting this has happened before and things worked out. Local authorities rode them a few years back, then stopped. There was a lawsuit and I think they put out a jar at the front door for the legal fund. This isn't the time to abandon an old friend, fellas. Gotta throw them a little support, even if you supplement with visits elsewhere. In the worst of times, PH is still better than most.

The old case of "I got lucky here once." Once being the key word. Unlikely it'll ever happen again.

Just to be clear: The sentence "actually fucking checked her phone..." means "she actually checked her phone" which I can't fucking believe. No actual or even not-actual fucking.

No, it's just accurate. There are hundreds of reviews here that say the same, and I'd offer the same. (Definitely a daytime place. ) Not every review that doesn't say "this place sucks" is a shill.

Lolruned, appreciate your full coverage of the Phila area clubs, but your 'standardized' reviews read more like a health inspection report than a TUSCL review. Most of us want to know more about the dancer experience and less about the soap dispenser. How about sharing some actual original comments about dancers and dances: are they friendly, GFE, high-mileage, out in the open, etc.? You're literally just checking boxes here, which is not all that helpful. You're clearly out there visiting places, so tell us what you're finding as a customer.

Agree with above. 5-7pm is not a good time at all. And not a good indicator of what's on tap.

Spot on! Always delivers, never a hassle. "Never ripped off, shorted or rushed" is completely true. And the dollar parade is actually worth a dollar, because the girls always offer a little sample in the form of the PH Handshake. Ol' reliable!

Just noticed this old post. He says "I was earlier for a job interview so I decided to go to the strip club." Genius! Definitely the kind of candidate any employer would love. "Um. Oh, this cum stain on my pants? Well, er, that's because I'm so happy to be interviewing here!"

Total bullshit. This is obviously from the club. It reads like an ad. Yeah, we'd write about the menu. No actual customer writes about cigar cutting fees.

This looks like a comment for nearby Cheaters. The music at Cheaters is way, way loud. Lido not so much. And Lido doesn't have a bathroom attendant.

Agree this is for the wrong club. No girls taking money, no two dollar bills. Wrong place.