Reviews

Ottawa, IL. Saturday night. Area seems fine to me, plenty of parking in the lot. Walk on in. Girl at the front, collect $5 cover. In we are, not a big spot. Real old time mid western bar feel inside. Probably hasn't changed in decades, looks right out of a 1980's beer commercial. Wood paneling, memorabilia on the walls. The bathroom is on the far left side. Bar island is right on the left coming in. One stage, one girl up at a time. Dances take place on the right side out in the open at $20 a song. Most people were white and older side. Dancers. Only about 5 here. Veteran lineup. Looks like everyone 40 and up. All girls white. Average to hefty. 2-5 range. Some fake stuff. Overall everyone was friendly, I liked the vibe but talent just wasn't there to be having fun. Rough, I sat at the stage for a bit but realized there just ain't much going on. I didn't stay that long and headed to silver slipper.

Back in Illinois for a bit so tried a few places to have some fun. This one is country with a capital C. You are driving through literal farms and there it is. Gravel, fenced lot, lit up and no issues unless cows decide to invade. Place is small and relatively plain inside, but homey, like a bar in a small town. Stage for the dancers and lapdance chairs along it, did not see any private dance area and the girl I spoke to said that was it for dances. The place was calm, no cover which was appreciated though a little after I got there it looked they began to collect one. Drinks were pretty cheap for a titty bar, 5 for a domestic beer and thew a buck with each one, honestly not sure if they were 4 or 5. There were about six or seven girls, one was hard to tell if she was working or off duty hanging out. To be real most were not super attractive and carried extra weight. There was a black girl that was reasonably attractive but had a little too much junk in the trunk for my taste, and two that were slightly older white girls, but fairly fit and attractive. One had dyed blonde hair and dark eyebrows, I love that look, the other was a brunette and quite petite. It seemed the big draw was going to the stage and dropping a tip, with the dancers at their choice flashing a downstairs view and usually giving a hug and dropping the titties in your face. No overt grabbing or touching allowed, saw a guy warned that got too aggressive in his tip presentation. Looked like most were tipping a couple to five bucks, did not see any big "rain making" which was appreciated. I tried a couple lap dances with the blonde, it was in a leather club chair by the stage. It was decent contact, full song length, but no one is getting any further than that in this place. At the reasonable price however it was fine, did not feel cheated. She hung around and talked a little, apparently a lot of dancers come out from closer to Chicago to work at a place they feel they won't see people they know, and also from NIU. All in all, if it was close I might hang out semi-regularly, cheap drink, friendly vibe and very low key. Girls were for the most part friendly and not at all hard sell.

The first thing is this place feels like a dive bar. When you walk in to your left is a U shaped bar in front is the pole and to the right are tables and a row of lap dance chairs. It is a dimly lit bar without a dj no real thug influence. Just some music playing and kind of a homely feel. The people there were all friendly patrons, bartender, and the 3 dancers. I was sort of the outsider as I was not a regular and the entire u shaped bar was full of regulars. The 3 dancers were 1 spinner, 1 bolt on tittied girl with an average build and 1 thicker girl. All were white girls. Each took turns on the pole I tipped each on at the stage and got boobs in my face along with some good tweaking but nothing to write home about. The thicker girl walked around the bar and offered hugs or motorboat for a dollar almost all patrons took part. The spinner was preoccupied with her own customer and the bolt on girl was in and out I think smoking weed as she had a distinct odor but no judgement here. The prices were local bar prices for drinks under 5 for a beer and I tipped a dollar. They had lap dances were 20 per song but none of the girls seemed interested so I just tipped at the stage and drank at the bar. Overall, I would say I enjoyed my time here and will probably stop in again. If you are looking for a strip club I am not sure that this is your place but if you want a hometown bar with some toppless women that occasionally dance it can be a good time. You just have to know what to expect.

Went to Lamp Liter at about 11 on a Saturday night. The club is basically a dive bar with a stage that has a line of adjacent leather seats for dances. There was typically a girl on stage at all time. There is no private room. Dances were $20 each and took place on the adjacent leather chairs to the stage. There were probably about 8 women there the night that I was there. 5 of them were overweight or unattractive (at least to me, I am younger and do alright on my own). 1 of them was pretty clearly schizophrenic or abusing uppers. 1 was in shape and hot but probably 40. Then there was one younger girl (23) with a great body and smile who was the most attractive in the club by far. I spent 2 hours of the 2.5 hours I was there with her. Drinks were reasonably priced. Crowd was local and mostly friendly. Doesn't seem to be a place for extras nor is it a place that is going to have women who blow your socks off but everybody was friendly and thanks to the one girl being there I got what I came for.

This place seems like something out of a David Lynch movie. Calling the decor tacky would be an understatement. The stage backdrop is cheap & shiny red plastic fringe that rustles from the fan breeze. Giant “artistic” nude paintings flank the stage. Fake paper torch lamps and cheap chandeliers are as close to class or branding as you’ll get here. The rest of the room looks like your grandfather’s basement from the 70’s. The music was all over the place. Of course there was the usual sleaze rock like Buckcherry and Nickelback, but there was also a metalcore cover of Britney Spears, Sixpence None the Richer, shitty rap, and a song that the stripper announced was “The Gayest Country Song Ever”. There’s no DJ, so the dancers use their phones to connect to the Bluetooth speakers. The music stops between sets until a robotic “Connection Successful” breaks the silence. Dancers began filing in at 5:30, which there was no cover at that time (Cover maxes out at $5, so it’s easily affordable). The first couple of dancers were on the thicker side and in their 30’s. Then an early 20’s chunker took the stage. She was a better dancer, but a little too big for me, and also too hungry for tips and Vegas bombs. Speaking of liquor, the bar was your standard booze and domestic beers. Nothing fancy here, but it seemed like most patrons were skipping the draft and drinking bottles. I followed suit. A lap dance is $20 per song. Not worth it in my opinion. It’s topless, but it’s completely out in the open, zero privacy. She guided me to the dilapidated Casting Couch love seat, and even in the darkness, I could see every rip and tear in the black faux-leather. I’ve driven past nicer furniture on side of the road. As the night went on, a variety of dancers took the stage. Whether you like them young or old, curvy or petite, country girls or Suicide Girls, there’s something for everyone (but unfortunately just white chicks). Tats on tits, hula hoops, stretch marks, blondes, redheads, and plenty of shaved pussies. My favorite was Seven, a mature little spitfire and true professional on stage and at working the room. Other things to note, they have plenty of gambling machines, a pool table, and an electric dartboard. The urinal in the bathroom is wide open, so use the toilet unless you don’t mind a guy washing his hands 2 feet from your dick. Friendly place. Weird place. But good weird, I guess.

In Peru on business. Got some local guys to hip me to the local strip club spots and the LL in Ottawa came up. Though the pictures looked sketchy as fuck, I decided I would go anyway...something to do. When you enter the club, you're in it. I opened the door and the stage was right the hell there in front of you. There is no booth or cash register. When I walked in, the lady - who I can only assume is a waitress/hostess - told me that the entry fee was $5. I gave her a twenty and she turned to the bar tender at the bar on the left as you enter and he made change and gave me back a 10 and a 5. That's the first time that's ever happen to me at a strip club. I had to ask her to get him to give me 10 ones. Anyway, as I said, you enter the club and the lone stage is in front of you with a pole. On the same wall as the door, to the right is a gaming corner. Apparently, that shit is ubiquitous in that part of the country these days. to the left is the bar as you enter and in the back left corner is a pool table. On the right wall are the two chairs for "private" dances. They are basically leather chairs that are separated by TV. This is a really small club. When you walk in, you see the whole place. Like all 4 walls. The atmosphere was really laid back and it happened to be "amateur" night. There were 3 regular girls working on the staff and 2 girls doing their amateur dances. Apparently the girls will do 15 minutes on stage. I think that's stupid, but whatever. By the time the girls get to the end of that long ass set, they are all out of fucks to give. So back to when I walked in, there was a cute busty chick totally nude and she was....barefooted! I have never seen that before, but I was fucking delighted. I happen to love women's feet and to have this pretty hot girl up there barefooted almost made my pants jump off and fly around the room. I saw all five dancers perform and all by one shed the shoes on stage. That alone will get me to come back when I visit again. There were no 10's. 1-8 1-7 2-6's and a 5 is about all that was there, but the foot thing made up for all that to me. There was one girl who had just had a miscarriage a couple days before. She wanted to talk more than dance, but she was nice. There was the busty girl from when I walked in and she was the best of the bunch to me. There was a thinner girl that had pole moves. There was the only ethnic dancer who was mixed and she was pretty and had a nice ass, but the tummy made it weird. Then there was the pretty and fluffy girl and was drunk as Cooter Brown. I would say that I was there 2 hours and most of that time I hadn't seen her because she was at the bar drinking. Her dance was actually the best of the night. There was a guy who tipped her on stage and I guess she was attracted to him so she slides off the stage and mounts the dude. She does the grind and the embrace thing that was really sexy. I actually heard that wood chair creek a couple times. Then she gets back on stage and lady who I guess is a regular gets on stage and lays down and she and fluffy 69 (not actually but there was some rubbing and face really close to junk stuff) right there on stage. Awesome. I never got a and because they aren't nude and they are in front of everybody...it's just weird. I was happy enough with the other stuff and when it got too late, I got out of there. Good time. I'll be back if for nothing other than the barefooted dancers.

Originally stopped to go to Silver Slipper but it is now closed Mon to Thurs. this was going to be my back up but oh well. Got there around 830. By head count there were 6 females working. By weight there were about ten. Two women working were way to big to dance. Two were just worn out skinny showing signs of too many kids. One who was from Chicago was not bad. She had baby fat and smaller tits. So I got 3 dances from Jamie, one of the skinny saggy ones. 20 a song done one one of two leather chairs. To say it was nothing special. Ok at the start to touch her ass. When I went in for boobs feel I got rebuked. From there it went down hill. She tried to tease and did minimal grind but it just felt poor. By the end all I could touch was the top of the theigh. I would avoid her as she has no clue what she is doing. I dropped some singles for the Chicago girl and asked for some dances and she said she would. She disappeared into the back and after 20 min I gave up. If you are stuck here and the slipper isn’t open you will see some less than great looking women mostly nude. Beer is cheap at 3.25. The waitress is a ditz but has a nice ass and tits, but doesn’t show them off.

Stopped by here since i had heard that a couple girls i really liked at fluffers were now working here. Learned that one they had never heard of and the other had quit a couple weeks ago. They said masks were requires but most everyone inside was not wearing them. Girls that were there were good looking. Seemed to be some non strippers there on dates with boyfriends. They of course were the best lookers. Girls would be on stage for quite a few songs topless only and then when they were done would tend to go in the back or hang with regulars. One that i really liked and tipped a bunch resisted efforts by myslef to try and spend time with here and went to gaming machines. Normal thing i do in times like this is to look at stuff on cell phone but those were jot allowed in club. After a couple of drinks and 40 minutes of being ignored i left. Cover was $5 and they took temperature as i came in the door

Have not been to the Lamp in a few years...for that matter I have not posted in a few years, so here goes. The club itself is not really a strip club. Looks like a bar that someone put a stage up in. I'm sure it was actually built to be a club, but it was built and last decorated in the 70s (or earlier) so it doesn't 'look' like a strip club...more like a strip club time capsule. As usual, there were 3 girls working...might have been more later, but I was there around 7PM so it was the early shift. M-Th if you get in before 8 you skip the $5 cover. Beers were cheap at $2.50 for a bottle, but I think that was the special for Wed...not sure regular price but probably not more than $1 more. Girls do a 'tip walk' after a stage set, where they basically sit on your lap and wiggle a bit, or shove their titties in your face (depending on the dancer) and honestly if you get the right one it's a good $1's worth. If it's the wrong one you are basically paying them to leave you alone. I've seen black girls or 'other' but it's generally a white girl crowd. There were 3 that night, one blond with moderately good boobs but a bit heavy, one black haired girl who was kind of flat(chloe?...maybe) but had a tone body and another black haired girl with good sized bolt ons and a decent body. One problem with this club is that unless you look like an ATM a lot of the girls will just hang with the regulars at the bar or by the pool table area. I was looking to spend some lapdance money and other that the tip walk I got no attention, and I'm above asking one to come over to me....that's not my job. I did see a few guys getting dances and they seemed pretty high mileage...again...I had money to spend and no takers. Guess I didn't look like an easy mark. Could be different for everyone but it looks like 2 way touching is allowed....didn't see more than that cause I didn't want to stare. BTW. apparently Wed is amateur night but I didn't stay till 10 to check it out. I saw 1 or 2 chicks in the audience but none looked like they were planning on going up...not that the mood wouldn't have taken them, but they were more biker chick looking than wannabe strippers. All in a decent time. Still grungy and seedy and comfortable. I like cheap bars where there are naked chicks as a bonus so this fits the bill. Rather have that than an expensive 'strip club' where I get accosted all night for 'buy me a drink....wanna dance...wanna VIP?'...all within 1 min of sitting down next to me. I would have liked some attention, but not that kind of high pressure sales. I'd probably have ranked it higher if I got a lap and it was good. I might give it another shot when I can stay later and let things heat up a bit. SMEGMA!!

I do not go here often but when I do I swear it's like being in the movie groundhog day. I walk in I see the same older lady bartender to the left and she gives me same friendly smile, see some of the same girls sitting with most likely same locals around the bar. Don't even get me started on circa 1970s decor. It never changes here. But, that's actually a good thing. The cover is always the same,5bucks,the beer is the same 4bucks,and the stage dances and girl quality is always the same 6-7 range. The stage dances are full nude and 1 dollar will get you more than most stage side tipping does. The dances are done on basic chairs along the wall, but some of the girls will give you a good grind and let the hands roam. 20bucks each. This place is no frills but some thrill, worth checking out at least once. Be careful of local 5-0

One of two clubs in the area. Girls are friendly. Dancer go table to table after being for tips. Dances are on a couple of chairs in the main room.. I would go back. The dance stage is in a small room. It has two dart machines. Has slot machines also. A mix of music genre is played but very little hip hop or rap. I went a little after 5 pm on a Saturday. Cover didn't start til later in the night. Not a lot of customers so a good customer to dancers ratio if you are spending money.

This was my first visit to the Lamplighter in 5 years. I went there the first time 20-some years ago when I was going to NIU and someone told me about this club. Remarkably, not a whole lot has changed in that time, although I did see they got rid of the old plastic chairs and got new wooden ones at some point. They also have these slot machine games I saw in various Illinois locations. I don't know what the deal is with that, since I don't live in Illinois and hadn't been there since basically my last trip to the Lamplighter but I did see one of the strippers playing one of them topless. Anyway, the last time I was there, I was bugged out by the poor quality of the dancers and some obnoxious customers, but this time, I would have enjoyed the company of all of them. I ultimately only got dances from 2 of them. I wouldn't say they were mind blowing, but they both seemed to enjoy giving them. One other thing is that they seemed to make more of an effort to sell lap dances than in the past. I think they realized while some customers just want to drink the night away, others do want the company of a beautiful woman. The good part is they aren't obnoxious about selling dances.