How much personal info do dancers share with you when you first meet?

15 comments

• shadowcat

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  15 years ago

  It is rare to have a dancer share her life story with me the first time we meet. Usually that comes with time. There isn't much that I don't know about my ATF. If I have a question, all I have to do is ask. I get no SS from her and she gets none from me.
• steve229

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  15 years ago

  Casual - sounds like we may share the same condition: terminal "nice-guy"-itis. After getting to know me for a while (even if it is our first meeting) a dancer will usually say something about what a nice guy I am. It never seems to occur to them that if I really was all that nice I would be in my hotel room asleep and not in a strip club at 1:00 a.m. That being said, within the spectrum of guys who frequent clubs, I suppose I do lean to the nice guy side. By saying you're "nice", I take it to mean a dancer considers you a fairly normal (i.e., non-creepy), friendly, polite, decent guy who can hold a regular (non-sexual) conversation and seems interested in them as a person (even if you are faking it). This can lead to the dancer letting her guard down and feeling like she can share personal stuff with you. What's worst is they seem to lose all interest in doing any more dances and just want to keep talking about their problems. I've learned that when a dancer says something along the line of "you're a really good listener," or "I feel like I can really talk to you" it is time to head for the hills, otherwise out come the stories about kids, DUIs, drug use, ex-husbands, ex-boyfriends and all the rest. Sometimes I wish I could be more a jerk, but that's not the way I am.
• casualguy

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  15 years ago

  I was wondering if it was a mistake on the dancers part to say so much. If I thought she looked good she might be destroying any fantasy I might have and I might turn and not walk but run away from her. Of course if I wanted to act creepy I could probably do that by talking about joining a vampire group online back a couple of years ago. I rarely talk about that in a strip club. It does sound a bit creepy.
• casualguy

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  15 years ago

  Maybe I should add that I don't drink blood or look like a vampire. Well I mean I don't dress like one. I was just trying to find out more info about one type of vampire. That group online is pretty much dead, no pun intended.
• DandyDan

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  15 years ago

  It never seems like they share much with me when I meet a new one. Or maybe I'm just not paying that much attention.
• mreef

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  15 years ago

  > Just as long as she doesn't start telling > me about her kids right before doing a lap > dance like one dancer did one time. I've had that happen a few times. Usually when we are in the LD area chatting waiting for the song to end and she is sitting on my lap. I thought it would be a turn off, but as soon as the song started and she started, I quickly forgot about her kids.
• Clubber

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  15 years ago

  I've only shared with my ATF. We also have mutual friends that do not know we knew each other before we "met" in a strictly social setting.
• SuperDude

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  15 years ago

  Dancers will unload personal information at the earliest opening in order to get extra money to solve all of the problems they are having. I once told a dancer, as politely as I could, that I came to the club to be entertained, not play the role of sugar daddy or social worker. "But you're such a nice guy, I thought you would help me out." Time to go.
• Notsosly

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  15 years ago

  Personally, I don't even like telling them what I do for a living, much less where I live (other than a vague town name/region), my personal relationship situation (some dancers ask that, I feel it's intrusive). I know some are just making small talk and are not that good at it, thus some of the questions can be a bit pointed. But I also get the vibe that many are sizing you up to see how much money they can squeeze out of you (good job + good neighborhood = good tips). Also, nothing turns me off more than a stripper telling me how many kid(s) she has... especially when it's like 1am and I'm thinking who the hell is home watching your kid(s)?! Totally ruins it for me. All that said, I've been called "a nice guy" and a "good listener" before. I've also played the shoulder-to-cry-on role a couple times, but only with ATFs. And even then, it can be hard because this is obviously not what I came to a club for.
• mreef

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  15 years ago

  I don't frequent the clubs enough to worry about my personal information, I'm always honest (town, relationship status, number of kids, what I do for a living). I seem to have enough trouble seeing the same girl again -- I make a special trip hoping to see a potential new favorite and she's not working that night.
• SuperDude

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  15 years ago

  And once they find out you might be useful for money, shopping, job introductions or auto repair, you will send flirting and game playing like you've never seen before. Watch out.
• SuperDude

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  15 years ago

  ...you will see..
• dallas702

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  15 years ago

  Maybe there are in our group (TUSCL contributors) a disproportionate number of clean cut, adult, sober looking men who are polite enough to act like we are listening. I, too, have listened to more than my share of confessions. Sometimes it is clearly SS and a set up for asking me for $ just as SD warns. But much of the time the girls have NOT asked anything more than my ear (and, of course, a dance). Sometimes, they didn’t even want to ask me for a dance after telling me about kids, ex assholes, broken cars and, and, and. A few times I’ve even ended up with a dancer clutching me tightly as she cried on my shoulder (that’s actually – NOT – a big turn on!) (BTW eye makeup will not easily wash off your shirt! Yes, we go for the fantasy and the sexy action, but sometimes human interaction is pretty good, too. And sometimes I’m looking for the exit!
• desotophil

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  15 years ago

  I get that a lot and identify with the nice guy tag, aka, soft touch. I enjoy getting to know the dancers personally but try not to get played too bad. I have learned to take any hard luck story with a grain of salt. It's kinda like the guy that approaches you at the gas station needing only a few bucks to get back home to his sick kids. It's a hustle that's easy to see, you just gotta screen the bullshit and realize that these girls are real people and deserve to be treated that way, but they are also hustlers. It's how they make their living. Don't believe it when they tell you what a wonderful cock you have, hahaha. I wouldn't want to walk on their side of the con either and try to figure out the assholes who will follow them home and leave em in a mess. It can really be a game on both sides but it's their life and what the girls do every day.
• cems

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  15 years ago

  nothing puts down a hard boner quicker than when stripper tells you too much info on medical stuff , surgeries , etc you name it, they've said it!