The Three Time Rule...

If you like her, just go talk to her. Believe it or not, some girls that do this are actually shy or socially awkward. Some girls never approach customers. Maybe she is new to dancing. You never know. Give it a shot!

When you tip you should be clear and tell her you’d like for her to join you, if that doesn’t happen on the first try then she’s not going to join you on a second or third attempt either. Better rule you should follow is the NYC bus stop, dont run trying to catch the bus, there’ll be another bus coming in 15 minutes.

Life's to short to tip and wait! I agree with @pachomp's suggestion that one should seize the day and approach.

If his suggestion doesn't vibe for you, you can always tip a host/hostess or waitress a few bucks and ask them to invite your favorite to join you.

Dancers have preferences in customers just as customers have preferences in dancers.

Tip her once and tell her you’d like a dance. If you meet her profile, she’ll visit you eventually.

There is no point in tipping more than once. Ever.

I dont tip. I just tell them to come over.

The answer to everything that you want that you don't ask for is no, so what can you lose by asking?

I always approach the dancers I want. Most of the girls I like are foreign latinas who barely speak English and probably hate approaching guys. Unless she’s waiting for a regular she’d would be crazy to turn down a client who approaches her.

How much were you tipping her each of the 3 times?

You dont need to tip to buy dances. You can just ask her if she wants to dance.

I generally am proactive and clear.

I'll ask her to join me if that's what I want. I may do it while she's sitting alone or with her stripper friends without including a tip, I may do it while tipping her on stage. It depends on the circumstance. If she doesn't come over after I've asked, but I still enjoy her stage show, I've got no qualms about tipping again.

There absolutely does come a point where I'll take the hint that she's not interested in entertaining me. To paraphrase a brilliant sentiment made by a former regular poster: I'll beg for pussy, and I'll pay for pussy; but I won't beg to pay for pussy.

There's all sorts of factors that go into how much effort I'll put in or how quickly I'll get the hint. An absolute knockout who seems fun and responsive, but just seems busy is gonna get a good bit of slack. I'm not gonna waste time on a girl who is just hot enough, seems kinda bratty, and goes off and sits alone.

If you want my honest opinion, I'd guess you creeped her out. You told us you jerked off to her picture, it sounds like you kinda stare and watch her while you're at the club, and tip without saying anything. You don't gotta be romeo, but you gotta see how you could come off a bit creepy.

Your rule is a special case of a general one: don't keep doing the same thing and expect a different outcome. If you tip her and she doesn't come over:

1. see if there are other dancers in the club you find attractive, and/or
2. approach her when she's not with another customer, in case she's one of the rare shy strippers, or
3. tip her a larger amount. But, if that's the only way to get her to offer you a dance, expect that she will require a hefty tip over the usual rates for dances.

I've never been a big tipper (or drink buyer). If I find a dancer attractive, I'll ask her for dance before the conversation gets one minute old. And I don't expect her to sit with me after the dances. Fortunately, I've always found clubs with dancers I liked, and who were satisfied with that.

By Saturday do you mean Saturday night, packed club? Honestly that's the worst time to get a dancer's attention and even if you do the service is generally worse.

Anyways these dancers who are ignoring you after you tip clearly aren't interested in selling you dances.

Look at the other customers in the club that get dancers to come over to them. Do what they are doing. Are they tipping or are they doing something else like going up and talking?

They wont automatically know you want dances just because youre tipping on stage. Some guys do that because tbey dont want to spend on dances. Or some guys just come to clubs to stage watch and not get dances.

The tactic of tipping a girl for her attention, was something some guys did at extremely busy clubs. They would tip her a $20 or even more to get her attention and try to get to the front of the line for dances.

Regarding iceys story of the guy licking shoes, he probably made that up

^ you never know. I knew a stripper (who I believed) that said a guy would come in once every few weeks and pay her twice the going rate for a VIP session to scratch is back until he bled and pinch his nipples. That was all he wanted.

If you’re three time rule works for you it’s fine I guess. I definitely cut bait if I don’t get an “I’m willing” vibe but I don’t bounce on a girl I’m interested in without getting her response to a very direct statement from me telling her I’m interested.

Tip at stage, ask her if she’s feeling to join me. If I get zero after a time or two, then I bounce. Not a rule. More art than science.

“Your” 3 time rule. Since we now have a grammar thread.

Ask if “free” to join me. Dammit.

Thanks for all the replys.

I didn't expect so many within the span of a couple days.

I'll do a follow up post in response and to keep the ball rolling...

I'm not "club furniture," I will spend when I'm there.

Usually on average between $300-$600 a visit. I've recently given myself the self-imposed stipulation of a limit of no more than $400. After I go through that, I'm out, no going to the ATM, time to go home.

The dancer in particular I referenced I would usually tip more than just $1.00, like one time it was one 5 and 2 ones in her garter. (My usual standard now is $10, usually 10 ones, especially if it's a dancer I already have a rapport with or I really like the looks of.)

It's not like I have oneitus for her. I gave up on her some time ago and found dancers who are receptive and I've had fun times with.

Noting it's a hit or miss situation for me,and bringing up the sexy, slender goth dancer as an example.

She's probably how I came up with my three time rule.

As far as being "creepy," I would like to think that's not the case.

The picture in question was on the club's Facebook page. She had on a corset, which of course accentuated her breasts, she had her legs spread, with one hand in-between her legs.

Very hot, very sexy, very erotic.

Material like that is designed to arouse.

Think about how many strippers are exhibitionists and are turned by just thought of a man masturbating to their picture or while thinking about them.

I think it becomes creepy if you were jacking off in public, like at a McDonald's lobby, not in the privacy of your own home.

I don't think I would uncomfortably stare at her-- I would notice and observe. I would notice her--She stands out and is a club favorite.

Like I said, I would notice her checking me out, even after I stopped tipping her altogether, but now I refuse to even attempt to speak to her. I look at as you had your chance, and now that train has departed. These things happen.

This is going to sound borderline autistic or fully or borderline socially inept, but initially I did not think to ask for a dance while tipping.

I did a variation of that before at another club. Saying "would you like to get spoiled tonight" and to meet my by the ATM. Both of the dancers I said this to were receptive.

I was under the impression the standard protocol was to tip and if interested the dancer would then approach.

A woman with basic aptitude for stripping (for money making) will never be not talking to customers, unless she's already offered a dance to every (polite) customer in the club. If you have to tip to be offered a dance, it could be that the most qualified dancers avoid that club, town or region. There are lots of strippers who are not good at it. You can make better money doing a bad job of stripping, than doing a good job of other jobs that don't require formal training.

When I was very young, I had a personal rule that I would give up on asking a girl out if she rejected me three times .However, I would count it as a rejection if I called her house (pre cell phones and pre answering machines) and nobody answered. Makes about as much sense as OP's idiosyncratic "three tips and you're out" rule, which also seems born of adolescent timidity