How To Prepare for a SC Visit

That's a sensible list. I would add (6) Prepare two wallets, so you can show her the smaller one when it comes time to negotiate on price.

I've been rolled up on by desperate-seeming strippers. If they had literal used "mileage" as their stripper name, would have been very appropriate.

Oh man dude, you're a genius. Thanks so much for that great information I NEVER would have thought of on my own.

It is important to have a plan before heading to a club.

You have a plan that works for you, and that’s great.

I don’t drink before going out.

I have a second wallet - that I use for club visits - I put my license and clubbing cash in there before I go out.

I have a small circle of clubs - and I have recently been checking reviews in order to know what to expect regarding covid.

I’ve used a money clip for the past 50 years but also carry a wallet.
I do sort my cash by denomination (OCD?) probably, with the one dollar bills on the outside. One other thing I do is keep twenties in one pocket and ones and fives in another pocket. I just have to be careful dancers don’t reach inside my pockets to feel Mr. Happy! Instead they can go through the zipper or pants leg of my shorts.

Have you got a problem I can help you with Tetradon?

^ You asked for advice, I gave you 111 pieces. I believe the phrase you're looking for is "you're welcome."

If in NYC, LA or SF, bring your vax card or pics of the front/back of it.

I agree with Tetradon. The advice offered is worth reading - as you asked a question - and it’s covered in his post.

I read the Bible before I hit the club so I can be in a peaceful state of mind.

Thanks for asking.

Reposting my SOP from a previous thread…

0. insure Mrs. Carey is not home, and not coming home any time soon
1. plate of eggs and toast
2. shower, floss, brush teeth, mouthwash, trim beard, aftershave, comb beard and hair
3. Old Navy Breathe On shorts, sheer boxers, loose t-shirt, hoodie... all black
4. count out the exact number of 20's I plan to spend
5. head to local gas station to buy a box of condoms, open box, throw out 1 condom and the box, keep 2 in pocket
6. drive a very specific route to the club

WOW! Great prep! Safety first and cash allotted.
Good moves. Have fun.

Make sure I have somewhere other than my front pockets to keep car keys and cell phone.

1. Take a shower, brush your teeth, put on clean clothes.

2. Bring enough cash to cover the fun you want.

3. Leave all your creepy at home.

For some guys, #3 is an uphill battle...

I can't tell if you're telling us how to club or asking us. I get the impression you're trying to tell us. Based mostly on the "disregard the number of reviews..." which seem to indicate you want us to just trust you, cause you're an expert. That being the case, I'll offer up a little constructive criticism of your advice.

For a seasoned vet, your advice is pretty sketchy at best. Suggesting reading reviews, okay, you're off to a good start. All downhill from here though. Noting dancer names? Ehh, maybe in your area. In south Florida, its arguable at best. Here, Monday's afternoon's Bambi isn't always Thursday nights Bambi; at the larger clubs it's a near certainty it's not the same girl. You're not just wasting time remembering names, you're setting yourself up for disappointment. Maybe if the review also noted a physical description with the names your odds of a similar experience could increase. Even setting aside the different girl problem, you've also got the taste problem. Don't understand what I mean by taste problem. Try a case study: Kim Kardashian. Is she beautiful? Is she a hobbit?

Dressing appropriately? WTF kind of advice is that. The sort of person who needs advice on how to prepare for a strip club doesn't know what appropriate dress for one is; If they did, why mention it at all? What kind of imbecile knowingly dresses in a way they know is inappropriate? The only concrete advice there is the implied going commando, which is hardly sound advice and hardly good for everyone. Sure, some like to do it that way. For others, its a terrible idea. Tell us what you consider appropriate. Bonus points for context. BTW, the context is why people look to see your reviews. Lack of them can't simply be disregarded because you assure us you know what you're doing.

Hygiene? If you really need to read a post on an internet forum to realize that you should be clean to interact with others, particularly in close quarters, you really need to rethink your place as an adult in a modern society. Such individuals likely need specifics on what constitutes hygienic preparation. Without specifics its kinda useless.

Sufficient cash? Again the same problem. This advice is clearly geared towards those with zero experience. Give some tips as to what sufficient is or how to determine it. And the ATM card? It seems contradictory to both have sufficient cash & and ATM card. If you did the first, you wouldn't need the latter. Some would argue bringing an ATM card to a strip club is terrible advice for a novice strip clubber. Perhaps totally fine for the seasoned vet with money to burn and self control to avoid overspending, but I think most would agree for a rookie with questionable social skills its not the best idea.

And then you suggest bringing Viagra? Jesus fucking Christ. If the hypothetical person you wrote this for needs to be told to wear clothes but not underwear, not be offensively dirty, and bring money to a strip club, they have no god damn business bringing Viagra. They need to slow down and dip their toe in the SC scene first, before they hit the deep end. And nothing of condoms at this point? Dude. Come. On. When you're ready for Viagra to enhance you're strip club visit, you'll know. Also, keep in mind not everyone who goes to strip clubs has a penis. Jus' sayin'



And no, I don't need your help with any problems. I'm well aware of how to perpetrate [sic] a strip club visit. Not trying to be a dick, but condescension breeds condescension. Just so you know, condescension is an attitude of patronizing superiority.

PS, I'm sure the use of perpetrate was just a typo/spellcheck error, but its actually my favorite part of your post. I've already ripped it off and used it in a real world conversation. I'm looking forward to perpetrating a visit to a strip club soon. It just strikes me as an apropos word to use.

I apologize if I mislead everyone.
Actually, I’m not new to TUSCL. I’ve been a member from 2006 up to 2010 under a different nickname. Unfortunately, I had to take an 11 year sabbatical from this great website. Again, I apologize for any misunderstanding.

Some of the members on here know my real identity and my previous nickname. Aside from all that I never intended to tell people how to prepare for a planned strip club visit. My intentions were to get a good discussion going by saying how I planned my visits.

Again in closing, I apologize for any misinterpretation of my intentions.

1. Shave, shower brush my teeth.
2. Bring $800 - $1000 in twenties, and all the fives and ones I have.

1. Hygiene (shave, shower, brush teeth)
2. Proper attire (for me). Very loose black dress pants with a bit of stretch and no belt, loose boxers with no button, black buttoned shirt or a semi larger tshirt so it can freely move up and down when they grind on me and so that it also covers my junk since I adjust him upwards before the dance. This prevents dancers from seeing that it’s actually out of your pants and hidden under your shirt.
3. Bring two condoms with me so I don’t make a mess when I ldk and the lube from the condom just makes dances feel better. Tend to get more HJ, AJ & TF this way as well.
4. Bring $140 for entree, drinks and lap dances.
5. Take a shot before heading to the club so I don’t have to buy shots in the club and just get one beer

@Bones1994

I play along and answer your questions:

Q: How To Prepare for a SC Visit?

A: I do the following:

1. Go to the gym, stretch, warmup and work out then go at the ATM to get cash.
2. Go to the Korean Spa, shower, shave, and brush my teeth, next I soak in the hot tub for half and hour, get a body scrub and a massage and go to the various hot rooms and shower again to feel even more refreshed, tension-free and with really clean skin.
3. Put on my uniform of sorts; clean good fitting clothes in basic black.
4. If I have a favorite ITC, I text her to make sure we have an appointment to be her first customer, if we have moved to OTC, I text her to confirm our date.