I'm fairly new to visiting strip clubs. I enjoy the attention of the younger women. I've had some great dances and often end up having fairly nice personal chats with the girls. I wonder how I would procede to having more physical experiences or maybe OTC encounters? Is that unrealistic for a guy my age? How do i approach the topic with a dancer?
That's a tough one to answer since you didn't furnish your age.
However, my opinion is NO. There are many approaches one can use in finding out if a dancer will do OTC. You can outright ask her or be suttle about it and say you would like to see more of her or spend more QUALITY time with her. Sometimes if you don't "beat around the bush" about OTC with a dancer, you'll never find out if she is of the 'outcall' type. Good luck. You'll get a lot of responses from other members.
Hey, 47 is an advantage, not a problem. No money? That's a problem. I don't think age is ever an issue for most strippers who do business OTC. Too old = no pulse.
adventureman30 - I was 59 last year and in great shape when I started clubbing as a passion. I've had several OTC encounters, but no SO to worry about. Most of my OTC was via invitation of dancers.
If you see a really sharp dancer you want to spend OTC time with, just ask her about the chances of spending an evening together. I doubt you would hurt her feelings if she declined.
You are right there in my age range... just a tad older than me, but I've had no trouble finding dancers that will meet for OTC, so there is hope for you!
There are a lot of factors that influence your chances of hooking up with a dancer OTC, and the "success" that you will achieve.
1) rapport... You HAVE to establish some sort of rapport with the girl. You can offer her all the money in the world, but if there isn't some sort of rapport going on between you and her, she is not going to accept any offer.
2) trust... she has to trust you. She is not going to meet up with a guy OTC, unless she feels safe with him, and is reasonably sure that he isn't going to harm her. YOU have to trust her, as well. OTC-ing could be very dangerous for both parties involved. (a humorous side-bar: the first time that I OTC-ed with my ATF, she left a letter on the passenger seat of her vehicle that detailed who she was with - my name, age, description, hometown, cell number, kids' names, etc... so much info that had I done something to her, my ass would have been in jail before I went to sleep that night. She told me about it later; I thought it was cute.)
3) expectations... you BOTH need to be upfront about what each of you expect to get out of the encounter, ideally (highly suggested) you work out the financial details beforehand, too.
How do you approach the topic with a dancer? Every situation is different, and is every dancer, so there obviously isn't a canned answer to that question. BUT, here is what has worked with me...
My approach is based upon the dancer and the vibes that I am getting from her. If the dancer is getting very "hands on" and is openly "taking the matter into her own hands", that is a green light. Be as open and blunt about what you are wanting. You can say things like "we could get much more comfortable and have a much better time at my hotel", and judge her reaction... if favorable, then keep up the line of suggestions. If not favorable, back off a bit, and be patient. Perhaps it's my taste in dancers, and thus the dancers that I select to entertain me, but this scenario has only presented itself to me twice. In both cases, their response was more than favorable; one came back to my hotel, the other met up with me in my vehicle - fun was had by all - yowza!
The more typical situation that I find myself in, is having a fantastic time with a dancer that I visit with many times ITC. After building a good rapport with her, I realize that I want to spend more time with her. I start hinting that I'd like to see her OTC, and stress that I'm not just looking for sex (because honestly, although it'd be nice, that isn't my main goal). I've taken this path with three dancers.
The first - who was also my very first OTC dancer - "went out with me" several times, but nothing more than sharing dinner together and talking (and some kissing). It was nice, though.
The second - (my prev ATF) We spent a LOT of time ITC, then took it OTC for dinner, and "other things". Keep in mind, patience pays off. Our first OTC was nothing more than dinner, then MOtel, where we listened to music and talked. Other than massaging her back, nothing happened. MANY OTCs, phone calls, letters, etc., spread out over several years took us from the first OTC, to "photo sessions", to private dances, to the "ultimate" playtimes that we experienced.
The third - (my ATF) Currently on-going. Started out really enjoying each other's company ITC, followed by some hinting about OTC, followed by a lot of coaxing. After spending five nights ITC - all but one were marathon sessions of 7+ hours, and about 20 phone conversations, we met OTC for dinner, going back to my hotel afterwards. Since then, we've OTCed a half-dozen times - it'd be much more often than that, if the logistics were easier to deal with. We usually do "date-type" things such as dining, talking, watching TV, playing games, etc. To date, other than a lot of heavy DFKing, nothing has happened. That is fine with me. I REALLY like her and if given the opportunity, I could see us "together", but there are a lot of issues to deal with; most are probably insurmountable.
How you approach the girl depends in part on what you're looking for. Your first step is to define your objective. Believe it or not, there are many different possibilities. And age is only an issue if you're looking for a free romantic encounter.
Fondl: I don't think age is an issue, even if you are looking for a free romantic encounter. Obviously, the wider the age differential is, the harder it will be, but it is still possible.
The first time I asked a dancer out. Well I was totally new to strip clubs having only had about 3 or 4 visits and had casually asked someone at work or somewhere if dancers ever went out with the guys in the strip clubs. He said no. When I heard no for some reason at that time, it seemed more like something I wanted to do. The second dancer I asked said ok. However I did not realize until I met up with her outside the club that she wanted money and was talking about doing private dances. I wished she had told me that to start with but she was new to dancing as well I believe. She called it a private party but it did not involve any sex. I seemed to develop a bit of a relationship with her anyway after that happened that didn't always involve money. Another dancer invited me out to dinner at a local restaurant after she got off from work. I ended up hanging out with her after work a few different times. I don't remember how long that went on. There may have been another dancer too but I can't remember her very well. I remember another dancer after her asked me out as well. When I met her outside work, she then told me or it boiled down to she only wanted to have sex with me. She said if a guy asked her, she wouldn't go out with them. I've had a few other dancers over the years want to go out with me but they wanted money and I just told them no thanks. It's been years now since I was approached by a dancer I didn't know and instead of asking for a dance, she asked to go out with me.
I would see a further impairment to maybe a few dancers to going out with a married man. Every dancer is different in what she thinks is ok or who she wants to bother with. Many dancers do not want to go out with any guy in the strip club.
I remember one club had strict rules with any dancer going out with a customer. If a guy gave a business card to a dancer, I noticed the cards seemed to somehow end up in the men's urinal later that night.
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However, my opinion is NO. There are many approaches one can use in finding out if a dancer will do OTC. You can outright ask her or be suttle about it and say you would like to see more of her or spend more QUALITY time with her. Sometimes if you don't "beat around the bush" about OTC with a dancer, you'll never find out if she is of the 'outcall' type. Good luck. You'll get a lot of responses from other members.
If you see a really sharp dancer you want to spend OTC time with, just ask her about the chances of spending an evening together. I doubt you would hurt her feelings if she declined.
You are right there in my age range... just a tad older than me, but I've had no trouble finding dancers that will meet for OTC, so there is hope for you!
There are a lot of factors that influence your chances of hooking up with a dancer OTC, and the "success" that you will achieve.
1) rapport... You HAVE to establish some sort of rapport with the girl. You can offer her all the money in the world, but if there isn't some sort of rapport going on between you and her, she is not going to accept any offer.
2) trust... she has to trust you. She is not going to meet up with a guy OTC, unless she feels safe with him, and is reasonably sure that he isn't going to harm her. YOU have to trust her, as well. OTC-ing could be very dangerous for both parties involved. (a humorous side-bar: the first time that I OTC-ed with my ATF, she left a letter on the passenger seat of her vehicle that detailed who she was with - my name, age, description, hometown, cell number, kids' names, etc... so much info that had I done something to her, my ass would have been in jail before I went to sleep that night. She told me about it later; I thought it was cute.)
3) expectations... you BOTH need to be upfront about what each of you expect to get out of the encounter, ideally (highly suggested) you work out the financial details beforehand, too.
How do you approach the topic with a dancer? Every situation is different, and is every dancer, so there obviously isn't a canned answer to that question. BUT, here is what has worked with me...
My approach is based upon the dancer and the vibes that I am getting from her. If the dancer is getting very "hands on" and is openly "taking the matter into her own hands", that is a green light. Be as open and blunt about what you are wanting. You can say things like "we could get much more comfortable and have a much better time at my hotel", and judge her reaction... if favorable, then keep up the line of suggestions. If not favorable, back off a bit, and be patient. Perhaps it's my taste in dancers, and thus the dancers that I select to entertain me, but this scenario has only presented itself to me twice. In both cases, their response was more than favorable; one came back to my hotel, the other met up with me in my vehicle - fun was had by all - yowza!
The more typical situation that I find myself in, is having a fantastic time with a dancer that I visit with many times ITC. After building a good rapport with her, I realize that I want to spend more time with her. I start hinting that I'd like to see her OTC, and stress that I'm not just looking for sex (because honestly, although it'd be nice, that isn't my main goal). I've taken this path with three dancers.
The first - who was also my very first OTC dancer - "went out with me" several times, but nothing more than sharing dinner together and talking (and some kissing). It was nice, though.
The second - (my prev ATF) We spent a LOT of time ITC, then took it OTC for dinner, and "other things". Keep in mind, patience pays off. Our first OTC was nothing more than dinner, then MOtel, where we listened to music and talked. Other than massaging her back, nothing happened. MANY OTCs, phone calls, letters, etc., spread out over several years took us from the first OTC, to "photo sessions", to private dances, to the "ultimate" playtimes that we experienced.
The third - (my ATF) Currently on-going. Started out really enjoying each other's company ITC, followed by some hinting about OTC, followed by a lot of coaxing. After spending five nights ITC - all but one were marathon sessions of 7+ hours, and about 20 phone conversations, we met OTC for dinner, going back to my hotel afterwards. Since then, we've OTCed a half-dozen times - it'd be much more often than that, if the logistics were easier to deal with. We usually do "date-type" things such as dining, talking, watching TV, playing games, etc. To date, other than a lot of heavy DFKing, nothing has happened. That is fine with me. I REALLY like her and if given the opportunity, I could see us "together", but there are a lot of issues to deal with; most are probably insurmountable.
I would see a further impairment to maybe a few dancers to going out with a married man. Every dancer is different in what she thinks is ok or who she wants to bother with. Many dancers do not want to go out with any guy in the strip club.