So I’ve been seeing a dancer OTC for a few months. I’m not a Dr, but she displays all the symptoms of borderline personality disorder. It’s been one hell of a roller coaster ride so far. I’m going to write a full article on my crazy experience soon. Some days she’s infatuated with me and other times she won’t text back for a week. Flakes often. When she shows up it’s awesome. Might be bipolar as well. Does anybody have any stories or experience with dealing with girls that have borderline personality disorder?
I think many of us have dealt with dancers who have mental issues. For some girls with personality disorders, dancing is one of the few jobs that allows for their perceived flighty behavior - and mood swings. Since many dancers don’t have insurance, they may self medicate, using drugs and alcohol, which can make their mood swings even worse.
Sounds typical to me. Strippers have their own way of thinking. If you try to make sense of it you will drive yourself crazy. If you think it is ever anything more than about money....that's when you start to fail. She isn't flakey. She just had something better to do. You are always just an option....sometimes the best at that moment. Don't let the illusion cloud your judgement. Just accept it and enjoy the good times.
“Borderline personality disorder” is one of the many mythical diseases of our modern, for profit, Medical System.
One of the many people that criticized Americans enchantment with psychiatry was Thomas Szasz, MD, he said that mental illness is a myth and provided the philosophical basis for the antipsychiatry and patient advocate movements that began in the 1960s and have flourished ever since.
He was highly critical of the so-called medical model for understanding human struggles and difficulties. He saw the uses of diagnostic systems as wrongly implying the presence of actual disease. He saw such efforts as medicalizing morality and the typical dilemmas and struggles of human life.
And what could possibly be controversial? At the most basic level, the American Psychiatric Association maintains a kind of monopoly on what constitutes a mental illness.
What happens is that we have an over sexualized culture that at the same time is sexually repressed. We ask the girls to be sexy and at the same time to be pure.
And add to this mixture the fact that:
“In mammals, . . . parental signals serve as a ‘forecast’ of the level of adversity that lies ahead. . . . various levels of environmental demand require different traits in the offspring.
The quality of the environment influences the behavior of the parent child relationship, which in turn is the critical factor in determining whether development proceeds along an optimistic versus a pessimistic pattern of development.”
That is one of the reasons “daddy issues” are prevalent in our modern society.
We should not be surprised by girls (strippers or civies) with the behavior you are describing, they are confused by the contradiction on the requirements of being a “god git” and having normal natural sexual desires that have to be repressed. So they act as any confused person would, doing one thing one time and the opposite the next time.
The “cure” to this condition is just to teach them to be themselves and be at peace with who they are, love themselves and be happy, of course this is easier said than done.
In the meantime welcome to the roller coaster of trying to understand women in our modern times raised in a culture that creates uninformed citizens making irrational choices.
You need to decide if it is worth to you to invest the time, money, effort, patience in order to get enough return (OTC, GFE, PSE) on your investment.
God luck, be careful out there.
Looking forward to your article with all the details so we can learn from your experience
I have a SO who has it. There is no cure and it’s based on factors related to childhood. They are nearly impossible to deal with and most common features are:
1 Fear of abandonment 2 Excessive emotional outrage over the most trivial things 3 Triggers that set them off 4 Sleep disorders (insomnia)
Dialectical behavior therapy is one of the few things that help, and they all seem infatuated with coloring. Actually I’m about done with it, and my CF and I just booked a weekend trip since I need to get away with someone “sane”.
Forgot to add..... they have the HIGHEST rate of successful suicides. Rick Warren, a Megachurch pastor had a son with it. He figured out the hard way, you couldn’t “pray it away”
I have no idea what she did or didn't have clinically, but when I shifted from variety guy to CFer, one of my first ATFs fit your description exactly. Super high highs -- I mean, like on the best mental and emotional and sexual high ever. And low lows. Flakey as fuck but amazing when she showed. Sexual monster one day, warm and affectionate the next, aloof and uncaring the next. 100% roller coaster ride
The main thing I learned from the experience is that I will never seek an ATF relationship with a woman like this again. I don't go SCing for low lows, frustration, irritation, anger, etc. The high highs aren't worth it. Get an ATF who brings you moderately high most of the time, that's way better than a roller coaster ride.
She -- this stripper who may or may not be bipolar -- is not going to change. It's not about whether you handle her right, or you positively reinforce the good behavior while making sure there's consequences for bad behavior. With mine, at least, she seemed scarcely able to control her behavior. Hell, over the time I knew her, she lost a couple of BFFs, due to the way she treated them (flakey to the point of feeling disrespectful. Which again puts in context how flakey many of these strippers are -- it's not just towards us, in many cases they're flakey to everyone)
Subraman I agree. The highs are great but the frustration and let downs are not worth it. At this point it’s the sunk cost fallacy. I’ve invested a lot of time to get to this point and I don’t have the patience to start all over. Maybe I need a club sabbatical.
Sunk cost fallacy, not to mention sunk time and sunk emotions, can be a hell of a thing to get over. After you finally disentangle yourself from this, the best strategy going forward is: recognize it and don't CF any girls who behave this way, no matter how high the highs are. You're not going to change her, just move on to a better stripper
Sounds familiar. Some absolutely spectacular times. Followed by long periods of radio silence. Been trying to figure out one gal for over a year now with no luck.
And the kicker is, I have a CF that I’ve put on the back burner that has a lot less drama and seems like more of a sure thing. Think it’s time I took Subra’s advice myself...
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“Borderline personality disorder” is one of the many mythical diseases of our modern, for profit, Medical System.
One of the many people that criticized Americans enchantment with psychiatry was Thomas Szasz, MD, he said that mental illness is a myth and provided the philosophical basis for the antipsychiatry and patient advocate movements that began in the 1960s and have flourished ever since.
He was highly critical of the so-called medical model for understanding human struggles and difficulties. He saw the uses of diagnostic systems as wrongly implying the presence of actual disease. He saw such efforts as medicalizing morality and the typical dilemmas and struggles of human life.
And what could possibly be controversial?
At the most basic level, the American Psychiatric Association maintains a kind of monopoly on what constitutes a mental illness.
What happens is that we have an over sexualized culture that at the same time is sexually repressed. We ask the girls to be sexy and at the same time to be pure.
And add to this mixture the fact that:
“In mammals, . . . parental signals serve as a ‘forecast’ of the level of adversity that lies ahead. . . . various levels of environmental demand require different traits in the offspring.
The quality of the environment influences the behavior of the parent child relationship, which in turn is the critical factor in determining whether development proceeds along an optimistic versus a pessimistic pattern of development.”
That is one of the reasons “daddy issues” are prevalent in our modern society.
We should not be surprised by girls (strippers or civies) with the behavior you are describing, they are confused by the contradiction on the requirements of being a “god git” and having normal natural sexual desires that have to be repressed. So they act as any confused person would, doing one thing one time and the opposite the next time.
The “cure” to this condition is just to teach them to be themselves and be at peace with who they are, love themselves and be happy, of course this is easier said than done.
In the meantime welcome to the roller coaster of trying to understand women in our modern times raised in a culture that creates uninformed citizens making irrational choices.
You need to decide if it is worth to you to invest the time, money, effort, patience in order to get enough return (OTC, GFE, PSE) on your investment.
God luck, be careful out there.
Looking forward to your article with all the details so we can learn from your experience
1 Fear of abandonment
2 Excessive emotional outrage over the most trivial things
3 Triggers that set them off
4 Sleep disorders (insomnia)
Dialectical behavior therapy is one of the few things that help, and they all seem infatuated with coloring. Actually I’m about done with it, and my CF and I just booked a weekend trip since I need to get away with someone “sane”.
https://www.cnn.com/2013/04/07/us/matthe…
The main thing I learned from the experience is that I will never seek an ATF relationship with a woman like this again. I don't go SCing for low lows, frustration, irritation, anger, etc. The high highs aren't worth it. Get an ATF who brings you moderately high most of the time, that's way better than a roller coaster ride.
She -- this stripper who may or may not be bipolar -- is not going to change. It's not about whether you handle her right, or you positively reinforce the good behavior while making sure there's consequences for bad behavior. With mine, at least, she seemed scarcely able to control her behavior. Hell, over the time I knew her, she lost a couple of BFFs, due to the way she treated them (flakey to the point of feeling disrespectful. Which again puts in context how flakey many of these strippers are -- it's not just towards us, in many cases they're flakey to everyone)
Im not going into any stories (too long and too many). But without medication the roller coaster is off the charts crazy.
And the kicker is, I have a CF that I’ve put on the back burner that has a lot less drama and seems like more of a sure thing. Think it’s time I took Subra’s advice myself...
SJG
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