Single vs. Married friends

I don't include my friends in my clubbing activities. I make friends through my clubbing activities.

@tahoe well said, I also have both married and single friends, it’s really not that complicated, most people I’m friends with enjoy the same activities that I do, that’s how we came to be friends. I have more of a life than our OP, I mean just chasing tail doesn’t occupy all of my time or thoughts.

Being over the age of 80 can’t help the libido that much 25, I know much of your time is spent playing croquet at the senior home. For that I won’t judge in the least bit.

LOL not over 80 Mud, I have quite a healthy libido, and it’s actually golf not croquet, but I could see where you might be confused by the distinction;)

^ Oh yeah thanks for not judging;)

Most of my friends with one notable exception have been married or are married. Being my age it's rare when people are not --or haven't been

I do realize marriage is happening later in life today than for a long time and there is a larger block of people who simply don't date in the 20's age range and maybe never will.

As for keeping activities separate there are more activities than not that it doesn't matter if your friends are married or not--sports related and work related stuff.

About ten years ago I had a group of guys that were all mongers and we tended to do things together that were centralized to being mongers and didn't mix with other parts of our lives but as the impact of social media got larger and the intelligence of the Internet increased for many it got a little scary.

I've thought about asking this question on here for some time and maybe it should be a separate conversation but how much of your life is spent inside a strip club or with a P4P relationship?

For me I doubt it is 20% in any category meaning not in time, effort, or money. I would think if it is for anyone (male) it would have a negative impact on your overall health and life in some way, shape or form.

Marriage and kids are a big responsibility - as I got older (past 30) it was difficult to maintain friendships w/ the friends that got married which was understandable - in my 40s many were divorced w/ kids and/or a 2nd-marriage and they seemed to have little free time, and often not a lot of $$$, to spend partying - and some I would hang w/ from time to time would just wanna go somewhere and drink and complain about shit in their lives LOL - doesn't apply to all married guys but seems to apply to many of the ones I know.

I'm already a weirdo by tuscl terms for preferring to SC with my buddies. Most of those guys are married -- my best buddy who has been my main SC wingman for years, the two other guys who (before they moved) were always with us, and at least half of the "tier 2" guys are all married. It just means that it's easier to get out for dayshift than nightshift, and since we all prefer dayshift anyway, no problem.

That said, not easy to make friends when you're older, so if I can find a guy, married or not, PL or not, who is interested in going out once in a while to overpay for a great rye at a "mixology" bar with hot waitresses, hey, now he's my new bff. I have married buddies who I mostly just go out to eat with, get a few drinks with, or get together to watch the game with

I lost a lot of friends once I got married, but soon realized that they all were dead weight and only thought about how I could help them achieve happiness instead of my wife concerned for my happiness and well being. As it turns out, I’ve earned many more friends through marriage and they turned out to be way more loyal and helpful than my party friends ever were. Plus, now that I have a family it never ceases to amaze me how enjoyful life is 24/7 round the clock. When I was single I agonized through the work week just to have a few hours of fun on a Friday or Saturday night, and even then my so called friends were so fickle they would back out of meeting up at the last minute.

So I would rather be in a committed relationship where you can count on someone being there for you over fickle party friends. Lame!

Seems often times when a guy gets married he loses a lot of his friends (if the friends are single) and his new friends are either some of his wife's former friends or friends they make after marriage, but seems often times the new post-marriage friends kinda come from the wife's side (wife initiated) - not saying this is the norm, but something I've kinda noticed, or maybe it's just my perception and not necessarily a trend.

Maybe it’s different for guys to some extent, but for females it seems like there is a divide between those of us married/unmarried. And also those of us with children and without.

I don’t have any friends who are either married or with children. It’s not some sort of conscious selection either, it’s just how it happens. At least with those in their 20s. There is this one woman who is my current roommate who has children, but she’s in her 40s and I went to high school with her daughter. But I think in her mind I’m another one of her “children” rather than a friend. (even if, functionally, we deal with each other as equals)

@muddy9 you said you are a military guy, right? From what I’ve heard about military relationships, you seem to have the healthier mindset at the moment with your single man thrill of the chase.

If you’ve ever been married you become aware that it takes a conscious effort to keep your old friends, it is difficult at times to expect them to honor your commitments, and if you have children they take a good portion of your free time. I feel fortunate to have been blessed with more than my share of people in my lifetime that felt it was important to maintain old friendships as well as make new ones. Many of my oldest friends and I have been together through marriages and divorces, and have given me support during some trying times, on balance to me it’s definitely worth it.

Mud posted: "The people that I want to surround myself with need to assist in the hunt for pussy."

You really need help from other dudes in order to hunt for pussy? It is a new breed of man indeed who needs to be surrounded by other sausages in order to get laid. ;)

But yes, marriage changes things a lot. Most married guys have many more life responsibilities than single dudes, especially when kids enter the picture, and cannot just run out the door whenever it suits them. This is called personal evolution. Now I'm sure I qualify for the "piece of shit" designation you seem to feel fits many married tusclers, but I too no longer have much in common with single guys. Family activities eat up most of the time I have left after work obligations, which leads to much more natural interactions with other married guys. So while I'm sure my former single friends didn't find my new lifestyle to be appealing, I didn't make much effort to keep them involved either as it's awkward to include random swinging dicks in activities that are really geared towards kids and their families.

Yeah, single-guys are married-couples are usually not a good-mix - as Dugan stated, different responsibilities and priorities make for a somewhat awkward mix - usually in the presence of mixed-company, the avg dude kinda has to govern his guyness if not somewhat put on a mask/bit-of-an-act; may not apply to all guys w/ an S.O. but ...

@nice yes. And it’s not something I’m gonna do just because it’s supposed to happen at X time. It’ll come but when it does I understand what I’m giving up.

@rick relax I say it with love.

It isn't the first time but it seems my observation is different. Marriage is less of an issue than being a parent. Having kids especially from the ages of 5-15 is when I noticed guys are less likely to mix with single guys. Even single guys with kids in that age range have other priorities and understandably so .

I have a fair amount of friendly acquaintances but my group of what I consider true friends is small. Guys I've known for decades not just years. A couple are married, a couple are divorced, and one committed bachelor. We're spread out all of the United States now. but we all still stay in touch and a subset of us are always doing something together.

When I was married, I mostly had married friends and when I divorced I lost most of "my friends" and had to start over.

Now most of my friends are single but even the ones who monger are not my type of mongers, so i usually do it solo.

Ironically, my married friends are the ones who live vicariously through me and suggest we club once in a while but they are ones who bail out first.

There's a reason married guys--especially the ones in their 20's hear bachelor party and think strip club......even years ago before it became more mainstream.

I have a couple of friends from my young school days. I keep in touch with them. I have a few friends from my work experience. and have a few friends from church. but I do seem to have the most as social friends from strip clubbing.

and my two brothers are genuine friends too.

probably 2/3 married 1/3 single friends.

Theres a big trade off in yourfree time from being married to single and dating. looking back at my dating life, i fucken hate it. i rather be married then be single and dating. Going to SC is superior to regular dating in my book. if i ever get divorced, i would not fucken date. i would still go to SC and try to get my needs met there.

^ I agree. When (not if) I get divorced, I would not date either. P2P is much cheaper in the long run and you can be yourself.