Effects of genuine gratitude...

12/17/2018 11:59:52 AM

There are a myriad of qualities I look for when finding a CF or ATF. One thing I do really enjoy is finding someone who is genuinely thankful.

Recently I met a new baby stripper and got about $60 worth of dances from her. She is a potential candidate for a new once a week CF so I tipped her an extra $50. Her reaction was like an kid on Christmas, super excited and incredibly thankful. In the days since that interaction I have thought about her and I think the fact that she had a lot of genuine gratitude made the experience better and makes me want to see her again way more.

My long time ATF was similar. In the last 6 months of our stripper-customer relationship she would only work on days I could come as that meant she was guaranteed to never make less than $150-200. She made it a point to be continually thankful to have me as her regular loyal customer.

I am guessing that the guys here that tend to stick to favs feel the same way? For those of you who don't stick to favs and like variety do you care about gratitude?

26 comments

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RiskA

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6 years ago

Gratitude is nice, but I prefer them being considerate in the sense of not wasting my time (keep appointments) & being straight with me (don’t float OTC unless you mean it, don’t blow smoke up my ass constantly, etc.). I’m not under any delusion I’m your BF, but I need to be treated like a valued customer or no soup for you. A generally good attitude is also essential, but more about life in general (esp her job) than necessarily about how great I am - it’s more how they treat me than what they tell me (if a stripper’s lips are moving...).

Icey

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6 years ago

I'd be more depressed than anything with that kind of reaction. She's grateful for the money not for you.

When I tried being a PL, to see what it was like, nothing felt real. I felt like a sucker handing money over for BS stories and fake niceties/affection. I'd rather try to pick them up or form something normal.

Papi_Chulo

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6 years ago

For many young and inexperienced dancers, the initial stripping $$$ feels like a lottery b/c they often don't have a complete frame of reference - a young dancer up to that point may have only had a minimum-wage job where it would take a full 8-hr shift of often hard continuous work to make what she can often make in 20-minutes at the club.

Trish_Club_Lust

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6 years ago

I am grateful for people who don't ignore me

Papi_Chulo

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6 years ago

Showing appreciation is nice in every situation SCs or not - it's nice when the dancer appreciates the PL's investment - and it's nice when the PL appreciates what the dancer does for him.

So it's nice - but not something I have to have - as long as she provides fair treatment/entertainment for the $$$, for me personally that's the end of my expectations and I really don't need any more than that.

The way I see it, most dancers are in large-part exchanging their dignity while entertaining us - I don't need for her to show gratitude in the process - seems a bit self-centered to me but again I'm not RickDugan.

blahblahblah23

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6 years ago

I'm still happy if I get a great tip like $50 for only $60 worth of dances and make sure the guy knows I appreciate it. I don't jump up and down and act all excited,but I really don't act like that about anything in life really?

blahblahblah23

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6 years ago

I don't think a girl has to be new to be happy about that? But you are new if you brag about that lol!

Icey

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6 years ago

Papi CHulo, that's true. It does seem like that for them when they first start stripping. And they're right, its a huge thing always having money in your pocket not having to worry about waiting for your next check.

Papi_Chulo

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6 years ago

Seems to me that often times a newby dancer, particularly a young-one not used to making a lot of $$$, that if they clear $200 on a shift they are like "wow that's a lot of $$$" - whereas for many a veteran dancer perhaps a $200 shift maybe meh and they would not consider it as "wow that's a lot of $$$" - just my sense.

wallanon

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6 years ago

The other week a skinny dancer I was getting pity dances from (because her best friend had potential to be a fave) decided to brag about how a customer just handed her $100 to talk with no dances. She brought it up to let me know she was having a good day and didn't need to do a lot of dances, but the timing was awkward so I didn't feel like more dances or tipping her after that.

founder

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6 years ago

I once gave a stripper friend a second copy of a Bowie CD that I had. I can still see the smile on her face.

Papi_Chulo

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6 years ago

Most dancers can see my gratitude by the size of the tent I'm pitching

likes2look

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6 years ago

But Papi, some of us only have pup tents while others have circus tents!

Papi_Chulo

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6 years ago

^ well - I may have been taking some poetic-license when insinuating the size of my tent

Muddy

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6 years ago

it definitely goes a long way for me. It can be so impersonalble at times. especially at the high end clubs. I love seeing genuine emotion. Thats the kind of stuff that makes me open my wallet.

PaulDrake

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6 years ago

@blahblahblah23 - It's great to hear you are thankful for a decent tip. I don't necessarily want someone to get excited I only mean that you can tell when someone is genuinely thankful.

@Papi_Chulo - Good point on the lottery comment!

-me

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6 years ago

Mmm, I think I like it more when I feel they're into me.

MissDevonshire

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6 years ago

When people feel appreciated, they will come back over and over and they will favor you. This works for both sides of the equation. I've been in the business for years but I still try to connect with my clients authentically and make our interactions personal. Gratitude means so much, especially in a world which seems increasingly self involved and impersonal. :)

Papi_Chulo

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6 years ago

I would think this would perhaps matter more for the custies that are into having specific fave dancers and like making a connection with the specific dancer.

For me I just go for the bump-and-grind of any dancer(s) and just see it as her doing her job vs some kinda personal encounter.

Icey

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6 years ago

I remember when I was a kid, I was barely 18 and I went to a club and I spent about $600 on a dancer. Real pretty light skinned Black girl. She told me she wasn't going to ask where a kid like me got that kind of money but that she was really grateful, that it covered most of her bills for the month. That was 9 years ago so it went further. She asked me if I could wait for her and give her a ride home. We ended up having sex in my car. I remember calling her a few times but her boyfriend kept answering. We hung out a few times but I wasn't into the drama.

Sad thing is, eventually these girls define their self worth with money...

nicespice

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6 years ago

I think most customer *prefer* it, but I don’t think dancers really get rewarded more for that behavior. Entitlement (if not too excessive) seems to go farther.

nicespice

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6 years ago

^Something I say as a generality. That doesn’t apply as much with, say, a club regular.

PhatBoyHell

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6 years ago

I remember when I was a kid, I was barely 18 like a year ago and I went to a club and I spent about $600 on a dancer. Real pretty light skinned Black girl. She told me she wasn't going to ask where a kid like me got that kind of money but that she was really grateful, that it covered most of her bills for the month. I asked if she could wait and give me a ride home. I wanted to have sex with her in her car but it didnt happen. I remember calling her a few times but her boyfriend kept answering. I wanted to hung out a few times but she wasn't into the drama.

Sad thing is, eventually these girls define their self worth with money...

Huntsman

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6 years ago

I’m sorry to say this but I think I’m too jaded to regard gratitude in a club as being genuine, especially if it’s a stripper I don’t know well. The gratitude may, in fact, be genuine but I can’t determine that one way or another so I don’t draw conclusions about that sort of thing.

That’s not to say that I don’t value a positive attitude and what seems like a pleasant personality. But it’s not easy to read emotional reactions in civvie life so I’m not sure that I can determine how genuine anything is in a strip club.

twentyfive

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6 years ago

I see this a bit differently, I believe gratitude is genuine, if you run a business, are you not grateful for good loyal customers, I think many of you are confusing the issue. Just because a stripper isn’t all gaga over your awesomeness doesn’t mean that she is not grateful.

Call.Me.Ishmael

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6 years ago

My policy is to maintain a friendly yet clearly-delineated relationship with the strippers that I see regularly. I genuinely like them but I'll never develop "feelings" for them. They know this.

That said, I enjoy being good to them (in ways that don't involve cash), and I appreciate it when they express gratitude (in ways that don't involve extras).

How genuine is it? (shrug) Who knows? Case-by-case basis through a lense of cynicism. But, even if I suspect that it's an act, I can still appreciate the effort.

Sure, I'm jaded about dancers. But they're people. It costs nothing to be decent.

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