What The Fuck 4Got2Wipe!?!?!?!?

You would have to be laying on the ground - wrapped in bacon - to get mauled by dachshunds!

A slow walk in the other direction is a useful defense for a dachshund attack.

I like that the page asks how you feel about the article - and one option is hilarious!

Yeaa!
https://ddfnetworkvr.com/

If you wrap yourself in bacon I’m willing to bet Juice would maul you to death as well.

Juice starts salivating just reading the b-a-c-o -

Sorry - now Juice needs a nap - and a wet nap!

How embarrassing to be the sheriffs deputy who felt so threatened by a weiner dog that he had to shoot and kill it.

A few comments:

First, little 4got is now walking around the house like he owns the place. He just gave me a look that is no doubt similar to the lion's. Sort of a "give me a new chew bone or it is wildebeest time!"

Second, why did that article not have a click box to vote "brilliant"?

Finally, I'm going to print up a sign saying "this house protected by a killer dog" with a silhouette of a doxie. That'll scare any criminals!

When you take him out you may wanna put one of those muzzle cages on him.

Ban all Dachsunds

I always wondered what the terror dog of the ‘10s decade would be. Dobies, Shepherds, Rotties, Pits, now it’s Doxies’ turn. Sounds about right.

Dominic77 - you can see the outlier in that scenario. The killer dog with legs the length of Vienna sausages!