Dancers and addicts

These things are always weighing heavy on my mind.

It’s tough finding solutions for drug addiction. It’s heartbreaking stuff.

yes it def is

Best way to avoid problems is never start.

easier said then done

The best way to avoid problems is to never be born.

often times is unavoidable

People are wired differently --it sounds crass but it is true and for some the use of drugs becomes the only way to experience first pleasure ( dopamine) and then eventually dependence. Understanding how drug use feeds the need for more use and only the use to satisfy the limbic system (sp) is above my paygrade.

I hard lesson I've recently learned is you can't save everyone, especially from themselves. I do my best when in clubs or even via SA meets to avoid ladies who are addicts once I identify they are....not always easy to do at first.

^^^I very strongly disagree, you seem to be implying that someone is forced into drug addiction. I’m not discounting the hold that the chemicals take over your actions, I’m saying if you don’t try them you’ll never have a problem with them.

^^ that was for ploedancer

I’ve never tired drugs (other than weed) bc I’m scared that I’ll like it. When offered, I tell ppl that, and they seem to understand.

twentyfive--I'd never say forced as much as saying "more susceptible" to becoming users and from moving to user status to addict.

I realize you were not replying directly to me above--but I thought I would offer more detail.

not saying its unavoidable as in someone forcing you what im saying is life sometimes pushes you into that direction.

You're lucky if you've not tried them. Addiction can be horrible. I'm clean for many years, so I have a special place in my heart for the addict that still suffers. The best thing you can do is love them. It was unconditional love from others that allowed me to figure out how to get clean. It wasn't all pleasant either. I try not to enable but instead teach people skills to help themselves out in the long run. If you find you are only feeding an addiction and you really want to help, then try giving them something besides money. To me the best thing you can give is hope. Show them being clean is possible and what that can bring.

Pd yea it becomes a sad state of affairs with some girls. We should have some compassion and sympathy. But the real question becomes what should I be doing differently or what can I or even should I do something differently when I interact with them and discover it? A perfect example of attempting to help and the utter futilty it can bring is Gawker's drug addicted ATF. Its utterly futile with someone who has no will to kick it.

My position is to have understanding but I try and avoid these girls with the trouble that follows them. Once they cross that line into serious drugs they become different people who cant be trusted with their own safety or mine.

We all make choices in life and taking responsibility for personal decisions no matter what the contributing factor is the first step to recovery.

Dancing definitely makes you more susceptable. If you aren’t happy and “on,” it’s a lot harder to make money. Guys can see it in your eyes, if your mind is elsewhere, or you are tired. It comes across in your body language. You can try to reason with yourself and be okay with making less, for the sake of your health, but the attitude of customers and the club, isn’t just that you are having an off day, or a little worried, or tired, it’s that you are unfriendly, lazy, and unlikeable. I genuinely get a rush from dancing and I enjoy the hustle, but I often have a drink early in my shift to pep up a little. If I was a recreational coke, or pill user, I can imagine how it could quickly become a habit. That said. It’s not excuse. All jobs have their temptations and short cuts.

There are two issues coming up here. One is whether addiction is avoidable. I think 25 is right about not starting to use in the first place. Life can be really shitty but there is still a personal responsibility to make choices and an option not to make bad choices. Stripping and the drug use associated with it are not the only choices available to a young woman, even in tough situations. If we view it as inevitable, there is no hope for a stripper or potential stripper.

The other issue is that we all make some unwise choices in life. Once the drug use starts and addiction takes hold, it’s all academic. A real human being is struggling with some really tough stuff at that point and usually the addiction isn’t the only problem. That’s where I am at a loss for answers.

Pd - your words show deep seated emotion. This is obviously something close to your heart.

The sad truth is - these current opioids are insidious. Once you get a taste - it’s very easy to become addicted. There are many regular folks who have minor surgical procedures - and end up falling down the rabbit hole.

With a stripper - the desire to self medicate - to lessen pain that comes from the grind - can be overwhelming. It’s important to always act like a sex-obsessed nympho. The facade is something most of us understand to be a facade. It’s definitely part of the sales pitch.

I hope your friend finds the help she needs. She needs someone who can listen - and who can help her to get back on her feet. But she also needs someone who is firm - and a non enabler. It’s a brutal position - as you are damned if you do - and damned if you don’t.

Pd - maybe your friend needs a break from the lifestyle? Staying away might lessen her need to self medicate. Maybe she can come down to earth and see that she has a lot more to offer than just sexuality?

Having a friend who understands - and who helps to lessen the fall - is very important.

Amazing that we call something 100% voluntary; that doesn't occur naturally; can be based on the actions of another and seldom effects an entire group of genetically similar people a disease. As unpopular as this may be Government dollars spent on rehab and treatment are the single biggest waste of taxpayer funds next to educational loans. Thirty-five years of every day in Court and people who beat addiction are a very miniscule number and most do it by willpower. The relapse rate for people who attend taxpayer funded programs is less than 100% because someone had to be successful. Disease = excuse. Yeah, I have addictions too. We all do. How we control; them is up to us. Then again the next time addiction is an issue in a court case I have will be, well in 85 minutes, so what do I know.

In psychology, they call this Social Desirability Bias. Imagine a politician talking about drug addiction. Or the environment. Or education. What do you imagine he's saying? He's probably saying that we need to spend more money to combat the scourge of drug addiction. (Or for education, etc.) It's almost inconceivable to imagine a politician taking the stage and saying "Ladies and gentlemen, we have now spent enough on the scourge of drug addiction... and on the environment... and on eradicating poverty! This is now officially the best we can hope for!" That would be unusual, right? Even though it's the truth.

To me, some problems can't be solved. These are personal matters. And I'm not at all convinced that drug addiction is even a problem to begin with. The more we talk about it like it's some kind of an apocalypse, the more we encourage low-life politicians to throw our money away fighting something that can't really be fought.

The thing is, as others have said before, if it weren't for drugs, we wouldn't have so many dancers. And is that really such a bad thing? You work a job because you want to eat and get lap dances. She works a pole because she wants to eat and do drugs. That's the market.

By the way, I like the opening post. It's like a poem :)

BurlingtonHF, when I see those large scale issues that plague the country, and I see the government step in, my hope of the issue being eradicated drops considerably.

I’ve rarely found the government to provide any solution that is tangible. The government is adept when throwing money at an issue. The deep pockets of our government might be the worst addiction our country has.

I would find it refreshing to hear a politician say “We’ve spent far too much money on the issue of poverty. It’s not gotten any better - regardless of the party in power. The best course of action is to stop spending. We’ve really got no plan to make it better anyway.”

There are many hot button issues that folks look to the government to solve. I look internally - as it’s generally best to not get the government involved. The one issue I’d like the government to solve is the issue of high taxes. But I doubt that will happen.

@Cashman1234,

I feel the same exact way. And I would also point out that this current heroin and opioid "crisis" seems to have all started out years ago with the government cracking down on doctors who prescribe pain killers. Apparently, when you can't get your Percocet legally, you may well turn to illegal sources - and then you may overdose without any medical supervision or monitoring. (Plus this sudden increased demand for heroin seems to have made the drug available to other customers of drug dealers, too.)

We really need an expert opinion here - where's Rickdugan and/or Gawker?

Just finally after weeks got my atf into detox....she'll probably relapse...but I'm hoping for the best. she's been addicted to heroin for years.

Upright posted: "But the real question becomes what should I be doing differently or what can I or even should I do something differently when I interact with them and discover it? A perfect example of attempting to help and the utter futilty it can bring is Gawker's drug addicted ATF."

Well, part of Gawker's problem is that he spent years using her addiction to his advantage, even going to far as to help her get her drugs so that she would be relaxed enough to fuck him. After all of that, any attempt he made to "help" was an exercise in hypocrisy lacking any hint of moral authority.

So, simply put, he wasn't the right person to be helping her. And to take that a step further, neither are we. Even if we don't go to the extremes that Gawker did in leveraging an addiction for out own gratification, the simple fact is that, in their minds, we are part and parcel of the problem as our willingness to pay them for sex allows them to buy the drugs. IMHO the only thing we can do when we meet a girl with a dependence problem is to not become a part of her story.

Putting aside a joke I made once about helping a girl buy her methadone (which is the stuff used to wean girls off of heroin) and a couple of stories where I was duped by girls who I thought were clean, I avidly avoid girls who are clearly on something. The problem, as I've shared via those dupe stories, is that it is not always obvious. However, as with most things, a person can only hide an addiction so long from someone who she is spending a lot of time with.