Hypothetical situation

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theDirkDiggler
Illinois
Bj99's last discussion had me thinking of a potential hypothetical situation that has yet to happen. Now there were times i thought it could happen, but in reality it just never has. Enough already, here's the scenario:

You go to a strip club and at the stage is a brand new hottie (or it could be a club veteran that you just haven't seen before) that really piques your interest. You go up to the stage and tell her you really want to see her/get dances with her. She immediately agrees. She finishes her set and goes off to the dressing room. You're patiently and eagerly waiting for this hot young thing to approach you for awhile when a favorite/regular approaches you. If it was anyone else, you might politely make very quick small talk and say that you are waiting for someone else. Then that stripper would usually leave. But the favorite/regular doesn't even ask anything of course. She's very comfortable with you and just sits at the table or even on your lap. For sake of this situation (although who knows if it really makes much of a difference?), let's say the table. Of course she doesn't assume or even care that you are waiting for someone and starts her usual conversation/flirtation. It's already been a decent while since the girl on stage left for the DR, so you start thinking she just forgot about you. The favorite/regular is just about ready to ask you for a dance and you're pretty much expecting it and ready to go back with her and then lo and behold, the hot thing arrives at your table (completely ignoring the favorite/regular) and just asks "Are you ready?" What would you do?

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avatar for rh48hr
rh48hr
7 years ago
Fortunately my faves understand I don't always get dances with them, so I just let her know I was waiting on the other girl. This is really not a dilemma.
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wallanon
7 years ago
If I'm waiting on a dancer, that's first thing I tell any dancer who walks up. It's up to the dancer to decide if she wants to sit after that.
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theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
It is just a hypothetical. Yes, in this situation, i would probably try to let the favorite/regular know that i had already told a girl that i was going to dance with her and that i'd be ready later for the favorite. But that's why i added the time spent waiting factor, where it seemed like the hot young thing was just playing lip service or was just following "stripper" time and you had no idea if or when she was going to come by. And the favorite started the conversation in a way that left little room to tell her you were waiting for someone. Like maybe she exclaims "How are you?" and warmly hugs you and then tell you how she's missed you and then asks you about "other things" while talking about other things herself so that as the conversation goes on, it just feels very unnatural to bring about the other girl until well the other girl shows up. Hopefully, the favorite is understanding, but what if she isn't? What if she considers it rude to be approached by this new stripper regardless of any "promises" you made? I still consider it a hypothetical dilemma unless someone actually has had this happen to them and escaped without any casualties.
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theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
How about if it was an ATF, and knowing her schedule very well, you were kind of sneaking, hoping or not expecting her to be in that day? Would you really potentially sour that relationship over an unknown girl, especially one this tactless?
avatar for PaulDrake
PaulDrake
7 years ago
Remember the don't be a little bitch rule.

I would just say to my regular girl. Hey I want to get a single dance with the new hot baby stripper. I'll be back in 5 minutes and then after that I will definitely still want to get a few dances with you. You cool with that? If she says yes, then give her $5 and say buy yourself a drink or keep it as a tip.
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wallanon
7 years ago
"I still consider it a hypothetical dilemma unless someone actually has had this happen to them and escaped without any casualties."

It can still be a hypothetical for people to think about how they would go about it. I've had it happen, and I handle it when it does just like I wrote up above. Often a dancer I've hung out with before will offer to sit and keep me company, then move on when the dancer I'm waiting on shows up.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
So it seems that most people "would" pick the new girl and i guess the not approaching another girl and her PL is just a "rule" for the girls.
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theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
I guess the reason this hypothetical has never happened to me is that the parameters are very specific. Never have all of them been met. Waiting a decent time on semi-flaky new dancer, favorite already sat and talking without telling her about the other girl. Conversation starts turning to fun in the back or how horny she is or whatever, then new girl just rudely ignores favorite as if the "promise" trumped everything. Never had it happen quite like that or very close to that. Had somewhat similar incidents though...
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theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
Okay, in an attempt to manufacture drama in a hypothetical situation that supposedly has no drama as long as you're not a little bitch, i've added a few wrinkles. Okay this time, you're very freshly waiting for this new girl. You just left the stage after telling her your intent with her agreeing to it. Your favorite/regular (and i guess this dilemma really only exists to PLs that are really into their favorites) sits with you almost immediately as you sit down. You tell her, you're happy to see her, but you promised the girl on stage that you'd do a dance with her. Your favorite responds in one of several ways, either she fake pouts and says, okay, you have your fun. I still love you, ya little cheater and faux sulks away looking back at you. Whoo! That wasn't too bad. Or she says that hot young thing? Hmmm, maybe i can interest you in a threesome with her. You're thinking you might be trapped, then she sees the look on your face and says just kidding and winks. She goes, I'll see you later and grabs your junk. Even better! Or she just says, whatever, and huffs away. Oh, she's pissed. But you know it's salvageable.

20 minutes later... The new girl still hasn't showed up. Or maybe she has but you've seen her go with another PL once or twice. Now this little detail does matter to your reaction. But let's she say hasn't shown up. She's just hiding or something. In the meantime, your favorite is in a corner looking bored, looking at you looking bored or maybe she throws you a couple dirty looks depending on how she reacted in the above scenario. She comes your way again and asks if she can sit (when she never asks before). You say sure. She throws shade right away and asks, what happened to your girl? Did she forget about you? I definitely didn't forget about you. How about some fun now? You're about to say absolutely when sure enough the girls come by and says "Are you ready?" I don't think this is going to be handled the same way, especially if she's already danced with one or two guys. Someone's getting shot down, and i don't think it's the favorite. Or is it? Because some of you non-bitches can probably easily handle pissing your favorite off twice in one day...
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orangepicture
7 years ago
I might run into this situation tonight. I have two very established favorites at my primary club and tonight is the first time in 2 months that they work the same shift (per their online schedule). I am specifically going to see the one as she only works M-F and this might be the last time I can see her for months due to my work schedule changing later this week. So if the other one sees and approaches me first, I'm going to have to let her down that I am not there for her tonight, but that I will catch her the next Saturday that I make it into the club. I'm preparing for a major pouty face and disappointment, but for her to be accepting of the situation...hopefully. Ideally, the one I would be not getting dances with tonight would be in the back giving LDs to someone else while I'm there and our paths wouldn't cross.
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Dominic77
7 years ago
Castigat ridendo mores.

Et tu, Fishstix?
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
I’m not one to lead dancers on. If I am waiting for another dancer - and I’m approached by another - I make it clear upfront that I’m waiting for dances from another.

If a regular dancer approached - I’d stop the conversation to make it known that I was waiting for the other dancer. It’s business, and it’s important for the regular to know that I’m intending to buy dances from another dancer. That way she can decide whether to spend time chatting - or to move on and sell dances to other customers.

When the young hottie approached, and ignored the other dancer, I’d make sure to stop her. I’d tell the other dancer that the girl I was planning to get dances from had arrived. It’s not appropriate to brush the regular aside, so I’d let her know I’d be unsure as to how long I’d be gone.

Nothing wrong with being upfront - as it lets the dancers know my intentions and they can decide what to do.
avatar for RTP
RTP
7 years ago
I think this is the same as many other discussions. These girls are strippers working for a living. Do they not dance with other people because of you? You are the paying customer. Take control of the situation. You don't have to be a jerk, just let her know that you want to spend some time with someone else. Tell her you like variety. Many people have commented already on this post as to how to handle this.
I just get so frustrated when we are so afraid of upsetting a dancer who is only spending time with us because we have something in our wallet.
avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77
7 years ago
That’s the thing they aren’t afraid of upsetting the dancer. That was never the issue. IMO, they’re afraid of feeling uncomfortable for even 10 minutes let alone a day. That’s the source of 60% of Tuscl (incl. this thread) entire probs with the opposite sex

*mic drop*
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Cashman1234
7 years ago
That’s a good point Dominic77. It’s odd that some customers will avoid an interaction that might be uncomfortable for a few seconds. Because it’s not just a few seconds. It can lead to avoiding the dancer in the future - as future encounters might feel uncomfortable too.
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Array
7 years ago
OP, I’m surprised to hear you call this a hypothetical situation. I’ve seen it more than I care to recount. Recently, I went to a club to see my ATATF. So, this is a tale of three strippers. A=my ATATF, B=one I’ve seen and talked to on occasion and had a few LDs with, but honestly not very good LDs, C=another dancer I’ve seen several times but never been able to get a dance with (consider her the hot young newbie).

So, I enter the club and sit at the bar. Dancer B almost immediately sits next to me and starts chatting. I’m something of a soft-hearted sucker so I don’t send her away. Besides I had been led by the door girl to believe that ATATF was not in that day. Within about three minutes I got a tap on the shoulder, turn around and there’s ATATF. She sat down on the other side of me. I didn’t want to chase off dancer B because of burning bridges and all that. Fortunately, ATATF was soon called to the stage and I quickly took B for a mercy dance (remember, I’m a SHS!) and got back to the bar by the time ATATF was off the stage. So, I was rid of B, but I think ATATF was a bit pissed because she told me she had to go thank a guy who had stage-tipped her. Next thing I see is the two of them heading to VIP. So now I was getting pissed.

I sat at the bar doing a minor slow burn for a bit trying not to get too pissed. After all, I understand she’s there to make money, but good god, girl, who’s your priority customer? Who’s spent more money on you more regularly over the last six months than me? But then another tap on the shoulder and dancer C has joined me. Now I had seen C in the club several times and had been intrigued by her well above average looks and the high quality of her stage dances. We had chatted a couple times but had never done lap dances because of circumstances - I was financially tapped out for the day, I had exceeded the set time duration for my stay or other such stuff. So, since ATATF was off in VIP I invited C to sit and talk for a while. Eventually the subject of lap dances came up and off we went. Those were quality lap dances, serious LDK potential but, alas, old man plus prostate history meant that wasn’t going to happen.

So then I was back at the bar sitting alone. ATATF had seen us come out of the lap dance room and was chatting with some other folks. She looked my way a few times and I could see daggers in her eyes. After each of us stewing for about a half hour she finally came over to sit with me again. I immediately hauled her off to VIP. There was serious tension in the air for the first 15 minutes back there but things eventually warmed up and we had some great virtual make-up sex. (This is a very strict no mileage, no extras club, so it was truly virtual.) I think we’re back to good with each other again.

So, what’s the moral of the story? 1. I shouldn’t be so soft-hearted. I should have chased B and got right down to business with ATATF. 2. Everyone needs to remember it’s business. The girls are there to earn a living. I can’t lay exclusive claim to any of them. Nor can any of them lay exclusive claim to me. 3. Be very careful with the emotions. Yes, I’m a true PL now. I have developed some real feelings for ATATF, but fortunately I’m pragmatic enough to recognize that everything stays in the club. I think she’s also carved out a small space for me in her heart. But, she’s smart too and keeps everything under control.

Sorry, I may I’ve gone a bit off-topic from the original post, but it reminded me of this experience. The thing about this board it that it allows us to talk about things, which for various reasons we may not have other outlets to talk about.

And sorry to be so long-winded about it!
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
I really don’t get how this has anything to do w my situation...

but there’s an easy answer for this one, that all girls understand. You immediately tell your regular girl that you just asked for dances from the girl on stage, and to come see you after (if you want), even if you have to cut her off mid sentance. The other girl has every right (and an obligation) to come get you when she’s ready for dances, and both girls will blame you, if you don’t let your regular know. She might choose to stand there and hang out until the other girl gets there, and might not.

This happens a lot, and if the customer doesn’t warn the regular, there’s often a short discussion ab it in the locker room where both girls agree, “customers can be so dumb!” It happened to me Thursday, but the girl talking to the guy was new and he’d left her at the bar to come tip me and ask for dances. I made sure I said something to her after, and she told me he’d let her know, and of course everything was cool.
avatar for Bj99
Bj99
7 years ago
@ Array, it sounds like your ATF has issues w the first girl. I’d ask her ab it. We can sometimes feel resentful towards a customer for unknowingly rewarding a dancer who has drama w us.
avatar for warhawks
warhawks
7 years ago
Geez. With all these “unwritten” rules in a strip club, why is it so hard to just get a lap dance, right?

Sorry if it sounds harsh, but I just don’t put up with the drama or “rules” between strippers. I don’t care if one stripper has a problem with another stripper. Not my problem.

When I go to the club, I’m there to spend money and get away from real life for a few hours. We are supposed to be entertained. Enjoy it. Don’t make it a chore.

If I wanted to listen to someone’s drama, I would have stayed married.

Seriously, just don’t put up with it guys. We’re the customer. We’re the one spending the money. We have something they want... our cash.
Use it to your advantage and take control of the situation and don’t put up with any bull shit from dancers. And don’t worry about hurting their feelings. There’s probably nothing you can say to them that they haven’t already heard dozens of times before.

avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael
7 years ago
Some of you guys really over think this shit.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
@Bj99

It's not exactly like your situation. But your situation and how i would react to it is hypothetical to me as no dancer has ever pulled that off on me. So i'm not going to try to create a discussion just for that specific situation. I just put a little twist in in. What if the PL actually did ask the DJ or tell the girl that he was waiting on her? You would have felt just as awkward and embarrassed by the situation. But this time there is much less blame going to the other girl other than the fact that she "rudely" interrupted you two after the PL approached you seemingly for a dance. But i added another twist to reduce the blame for the PL. It would be shady for the PL to "set" you up like that. So i made the other girl flaky and not go to the PL right away, who doesn't stay very long anyway. He gets tired of waiting so he approaches you, available for dances right away. Now repeat your situation. How would you disburse the blame? If i'm the PL, i still pick you as an answer to my hypothetical question in the OP as i still think it's rude to leave a favorite that i'm already sitting with for some random dancer that wasn't respectful of my time even if i already asked her for a dance, although other TUSCLers would seem to rather tell you that they were waiting for the other dancer. Of course the difference is that you approached them and not the other way around. If they had approached you then i think they would more than likely pick you over the other girl unless you bolt as quickly as you did.
avatar for theDirkDiggler
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
Anyway, i guess my point is that i don't like to waste time at a strip club anymore than i like to waste money. There have been numerous times i've asked girls on stage to see me later and they just take their time or they never get around to me that night. There have also been times that i have told girls that approached me that i was waiting on another girl and that other girl never showed up, and i feel a little awkward after that, especially if one of the girls i "rejected" is a girl i'm interested in getting dances with. In fact that other girl is often hard to find on the floor. Otherwise, i would approach her myself and then usually she does finally deliver that dance (often not that great as i can tell that i'm not her first choice). But she is usually either hiding in the dressing room or something or she's sitting/dancing with another PL. In that case, i've already recognized that that girl has made her choice. So i'll usually be proactive and find another girl even if i supposedly have one in waiting. Or another girl (sometimes a regular or favorite) will find me. This can create issues. I just find that for the most part it hasn't. Because overwhelmingly IME, girls don't interrupt other dancers with their PLs.

There have been a couple instances where i was sitting with a non regular dancer and a favorite walked by and just disregarded that dancer and sat with me. In one of those cases i wasn't very interested in the girl i was sitting with that was trying to sell me a dance, so i actually appreciated the favorite "rescuing" me from her. Although i didn't need such rescuing. In another case, the other girl was a former favorite, so i ended up doing double dances (only the third time i've ever done double dances, but definitely the most expensive as i did multiple double dances). Not my preference, and after doing them i decided i wouldn't do them again, or any double dance as i found them not to be worth it although those two favorites really did try. Since then, i've never had similar situations again (interrupted by any dancer while sitting with a girl).
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