Divorcing an ATF
JordanBelfort
Wall Street
Been visting my ATF for several years. Our last VIP was terrible, wasnt into it at all and the majority of it was spent listening to her analyzing the fluctuation of my tipping. Ive had fun paying her rent but now its time for some new fun. Pretty sure a fight will ensue if i drop her cold turkey in the club for one of her competitors.
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38 comments
They're jealous because i drop a ton on her and she's taking me for granted somewhat...I have cut back anyway.....I'm just fueling her heroin habit that much more...She was talking about quitting, but we all know that's wishful thinking...
make a new plan, Stan
Don't need to be coy, Roy,
just listen to me
Hop on the bus, Gus,
don't need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee,
and get yourself free
It’s your money, after all, and you get to decide where to spend it.
Even if she trash talks you to the other girls, there’ll be someone, possibly many such, who won’t believe her and view it as an opportunity.
You had similar hesitations back then, too. This might not be the hobby for you. I'm just being blunt.
If I were you, I would keep in mind that she's a professional stripper and she knew EXACTLY what she was doing when she discussed the tip fluctuation with you. She sees your relationship approaching its shelf life, she's unhappy enough with the business arrangement that she's going to try to get more $ out of you, even though she realizes there's a risk you'll get pissed and leave her. That's what she wants -- give her more, or leave, that's why she spent so much time discussing it. If you ever felt any misplaced obligation towards her, she's wonderfully opened the door for you to rid yourself of that misplaced obligation.
Thanks for the advice, going tonight so will provide an update.
Did her service start slipping and subsequently you tipped less, or did you just decide to start paying less b/c perhaps you thought you were paying too-much?
That said, I'll also go against the grain a bit and recommend you take a look at yourself before just cutting her lose. I think often times as customers our expectations can get out of whack. It's easy to think the grass is always greener and she's short changing you, but that may not be the case. For that reason, I think BJ's advice of taking a break is also very viable. Try another club, see what's out there. Let her live without your regular contribution to her bottom line for a while. Maybe you'll both realize you're better off together & come to an agreement. Maybe you'll both realize you're not, and both live happily ever after.
I can tell you I've gotten spoiled and cut a stripper lose only to find out she was well above average. I've also cut them lose only to realize how much I was spoiling the last one. A quick market check for both of you will help you figure out which situation you're in.
If you were still interested in her probably would've been better to discuss a different pricing arrangement going-forward if you weren't comfortable with the current pace (as long as it was still a fair price going-forward) .
Since she has a heroin habit, it’s possible she will react in an unpredictable way. Just be prepared for that, and handle the interaction in a reasonable manner. If she gets upset - remain calm.
Hopefully she has seen the end approaching too. Your moving on should simply confirm her thoughts.
Second, I tend to agree with Bj about maybe taking a break from this club for a bit. The passage of a bit of time in transactional relationships is almost always helpful when things get tense. When you decide to go back to this club, follow Subraman’s advice about being polite and direct and not a whiny bitch. But I would at least take a short break from the club. Who knows, maybe she will do you a favor and text you that you’re done. Sounds like she is pissed about your money or lack thereof. Give her a chance to replace your stream of income.
I cut off my ATF (she still is) of about 8 years. She left the local area after our discussions about things in her life. She was in a place where it was difficult to get to see her. Went from at least weekly to if lucky one every couple of months. Just wasn't good for me. I told her face to face, of course. I could tell by her reaction that she didn't like it any more than I did, but such is life. I've seen her a number of times since, but all except for few minutes were with my family around. Wasn't able to talk with her. Now, everyone has moved on, but I still miss her.
Now confronting her / firing her / leaving the lines of communications open by letter her down confidently, professionally, and tactfully is good. Then give her a day or two (or 3 or 4) to calm down. Women sometimes act more emotionally than men. I'd give her a day minimum to vent. This is where I might find a different club . I wouldn't because I'm an asshole and a dick. But some guys would rather avoid that. I'm married so I'm used to it, lol.
Perhaps Subraman is available for a reasonable fee.