Cell Phones in the Club

yes.

I think there is a growing strategy among dancers working the floor to approach guys from behind or when we're not looking. I do know that I get approached from behind a lot more. My theory is that this approach catches us by surprise and counteracts our visual evaluations that can lead to decisions before they even get to our seat.

I can't say I've noticed more girls approaching me when I'm on the ph, but it could be a particular club thing.

I also don't like a girl right up against me where I can't judge her bod especially since for me it's pretty-much all ab the bod & don't care much what the face looks like - I mostly go to small dives where dances are given barside and the stage is inside the bar - I will usually turn my barstool sideways and sit sideways to the bar so I can see who's approaching me.

IME I think I probably have less girls approaching me when I'm on the ph - I assume they either figure I'm busy or I don't wanna interact

Every dancer has an approach carefully choreographed to maximize success. If they approach from behind, you can guaran-damn-tee they have an ugly body.

Either they think you're bored or they are jealous that you're on the phone when they're not allowed to be.

I don’t think it’s jealousy. In most of the places I go, the girls are on their phone a lot more than I am.

If it's a club you're known at:

1) the girls may feel less formal with you and feel it's ok to approach you

2) they know you're a good spender and they don't wanna risk another girl getting to you first (especially in a club with not a lot of custies)

Maybe I'm naive, but I don't think everything a dancer does is completely programmed. I think most just go with the flow.

Probably more calculating at the high end clubs though.

If she walks up behind you and you really want to get a good look at her, tell her to take a few steps in front of you and to turn around like a model. Don't be afraid of offending her or disrespecting her. You must inspect the merchandise before accepting delivery.

its most likely they approach when on phone because they think we will be texting our regulars or CF's. They try to catch you at the pass before you make that text and intercept that dance..

Reminds me of when I was at a regular bar and saw a guy working away on a laptop. Work that takes more than a few seconds seems out of place unless you work for the establishment, jmho. Kind of like doing work at an amusement park or concert?

You do whatever you want but from a 3rd party perspective, probably looks more like texting a friend than work.

Ha, the girls really are brilliant in their own way. So easy to underestimate them, but that's a mistake. I have to say I don't notice much of what you describe either, but I have to guess it's:
1. One of the many strategies that works by depending on the customer being confused about strip-club etiquette vs real world romance etiquette. In this case, feeling super guilty about ignoring the strippers (who fill in for "your date" or other pretty girl you're interested in)
2. A practiced by those whose approach works by surprise... girls who sneak up to hide their body, girls who specialize in things like guys who just got there so they're a bit off-kilter
3. Punishment of the customer for being on the phone

I imagine these techniques work often.

As JackScott implies, the real counter here is to follow my rule #2: Don't be a little bitch. You weren't doing anything wrong, there's no reason to be intimidated by a 22-year-old in her underwear, just ask for or say what you want. That could be anything from, "Hey there! I'm so sorry, I have an urgent work email that I have to answer!" if you feel like staying on your phone, to "Hey, you snuck up on me, you're like a navy seal sneaking up on bin laden! (chuckle together about it) I missed you on your approach, give me the model twirl" if you actually want to see what she looks like

I usually assume that if a guy is on his phone at the club, it’s not that important, or he wouldn’t be at the club. I figure they can finish what they are doing, and then talk to me, at least to greet me. I do not prefer to approach while a guy is on his phone, but sometimes it’s necessary, if I’m going to beat other girls to his table.

Another thought I have ab it is that if a guy doesn’t care enough to be watching, and sending signals, to specific girls, he must not care all that much who sits w him.

I rarely take my phone into a club. I am retired. I always try to sit with my back to a wall so that I can see what is coming towards me.

shadowcat is like the old western gunfighter of the group, I see him sitting in the corner with his black cowboy hat tilted low; oddly, although the room is completely dark, there's a little slit of light that shines only across his eyes. If the McPyle brothers come in, those lily-livered horse wrangling good for nothings, shadowcat may have to draw, barkeep.

(I like to sit with my back to the wall too LOL)

Subraman: I certainly agree with your “don’t be a little bitch” theory of strip clubbing. My usual response is “sorry I have to finish this important email,” which is true. I would say this is a good excuse except I don’t need any excuses. If I’m not on my phone and am approached by someone I’m not interested in, I have no problem just saying “thanks but I’m ok for now.” And if I’m on my phone and I’ve gotten a good enough look to know I am interested—well the email can probably wait a few minutes. I’m in a strip club after all. I don’t think I would ever ask her to do a twirl for me. I have asked girls I’m interested in to show off for me, but I think it would be kind of rude to ask her to show off for me and then tell her I’m not interested. I try not to be a little bitch, but I try not to be rude either.

Interesting comments. An interesting thought about dancers approaching more when you are using your phone too.

I wonder if it just seems like more - because you are concentrating - and the interruption is more annoying? It’s definitely possible that it happens more too.

When a dancer approaches from behind - and I don’t know the dancer - I always have her spin around and show me everything.

I get approached by a variety of dancers on each trip to my local club. Some approach me because we’ve had dances before - some approach because they know I’ve got a nice wad of cash - and others are the strong sell dancer types. If I’m approached from behind (without asking the dancer to come over) - I expect the dancer to be either selling dances or looking to get me to buy a drink for her.

If a dancer playfully approaches me - and runs her nipples over my back when she stops by - I’ll play along and chat - and tip her.

Do you normally sit at the bar? If so - it’s a natural way to approach a person seated and looking towards the stage?

Cashman: I usually sit at the bar, but most of the places I go the stage is not behind the bar, so looking at the stage does not put my back to the rest of the club. Like Papi, I usually sit kind of sideways to the bar so I can see what’s going on around me.

-->"I try not to be a little bitch, but I try not to be rude either."

Or, in other words, you also follow my rule #1 :) :)

Anyway, just to be clear, my response wasn't directed at you personally, just a general rant on things

Thanks. I didn’t think it was directed at me personally. If I thought that, it would mean I knew I was acting like a little bitch.

I'm all for being upfront and direct - but I too would feel a bit too douchey asking a girl to do the twirl for me than saying "no thanks" - perhaps "it's not wrong" but I'm not comfortable with it.

@Bj99 said, "I usually assume that if a guy is on his phone at the club, it’s not that important, or he wouldn’t be at the club."

This, plus the rest of what she said. Notice the guys who club during the say, the JS and 25 types. They can club during the day, dress casual, because they can, and be interrupted.

Gone are the days when we used to conduct business from the SC in the '90s. The feminists seeking to shatter some more of the glass ceiling brought lawsuits against company boards for this. Since one can no longer expense SC charges on an expense report or on a company P-card, why would you conduct business in a SC ... on your dime. Again for emphasis:

@Bj99 said, "I usually assume that if a guy is on his phone at the club, it’s not that important, or he wouldn’t be at the club."

With that said, I'm sort of in the same boat. I, too, carry an e-leash-9000 (smartphone + laptop). And am more or less expected to answer emails, text, or phone call pretty much 24x7, or it certainly feels that way, depending on the sales team, sales VP, or the C-suite .. or else. My compromise is the club during lulls. Friday and Saturday night I get no calls , texts, or emails. So that is one of the main reasons why I club then. It beats having to respond to email ITC.

How you handle it is up to you. I know how I approach it.

I *do* miss the days in the '90s of departmental meetings or sales meetings in SCs. It was more normal and strippers sort fo expected it and worked around it. But that was an earlier generation of strippers and the older generation of business.

edit, typo: "because they can, and NOT be interrupted."
^missed a word.

I'm in a similar situation. I'm able to take off in the middle of the day during the week, but its in my best interest to answer emails from some folks rather quickly. I've got rules on my phone to distinguish important emails. I also have a personal life and sometimes answer personal texts if I'm waiting for my dancer to arrive or return.

I do find that the likelihood of being approached by a dancer is higher if I'm on my phone. I didn't notice it, but another dancer mentioned it a while back and while it may be confirmation bias, I've since observed that a lot of dancers do approach while i'm on my phone. The dancer said it was the "sneak attack" that they were trying, and again that holds up with my observations. It does seem to be the girls with body issues that snuggle up before I see them. The hotter girls approach more when I'm paying attention & they see me notice them.


To BJ's points, of course its not that important if I'm in the club. If it was that critical I'd step outside or stay my ass at the office. But, its often important enough to me that I'd rather finish dealing with my email/text than talk to a stripper who can't wait 2 minutes for me to finish. I'll always greet a stripper who approach, at least with a "one second please" kind of thing. Unless of course she's a chronic dumbass who should know I'm not interested. As far as not caring enough to watch, that's not my thinking. For me, its having a slightly higher priority of dealing with my email than scoping out strippers. Give me a few minutes and my priorities will shift back. If they don't, its because I'm waiting for someone and killing time. So, my point, for whatever its worth to you, is that you might be better off letting another girl "beat" you to me, cause I'm gonna shoot her down with prejudice without giving her a second look. If you're cute and approach while I'm paying attention, you'll see me notice you and give you some indication of interest or not, so you won't waste your time or mine.

Bj99 makes a very good point. If you are in a strip club on your phone - it shouldn’t be highly important matters being handled.

You don’t want to give the ok on a major trade/funding - while you’ve got Trixie’s thighs over your shoulders.

It’s difficult to take a conference call with a Nelly song playing in the background...

I’ve seen guys literally run out of the club, trying to answer a call away from the music. It must either be an important client, the boss, or the wife. No matter, it’s funny.

@ Dolfan, i really wish more guys were as assertive as you. If the club is slow, I don’t mind sitting w a guy while he is on his phone for a few mins, and waiting. I’m attractive and I have a good attitude. Unless he is waiting on someone, he’s usually pleased I sat down, and will either get a dance soon, or I can tell he’s not interested and I’ll quickly move on. Other girls will sit there for a long time, if it’s slow, and some guys are not so assertive as you. When it’s slow, I’d rather get my chance to see if he’s interesting, and would like a dance, than wait for him to shoo away a girl, or even just sit there w her the whole time and not get a dance bc she won’t leave, but he’s not that into her.

To a large extent this is why I am not an afternoon guy and tend to wait around 8 PM before I head to a club.

Different professions have different methods to conduct business. In mine it could be quite and going to schedule for almost the entire day and something happens, elevates to a level I need to respond.

As a rule I will glance at my phone from time to time when in a club but the volume is off on all settings ring tones and text messages.

When I am in a club I sit at the bar and I chose a seat that the dancer would need to go around into the bartender area to sneak up on me.