I wish more of these girls had people skills. I know I'm asking a lot, but I'm not asking too much. I was at a club yesterday and the dancer walked away from a deal. If she'd said the right thing she'd had me. Instead of "I won't do 5 but I'll do 4 and any more is a waste of my time" she could have leaned over and whispered "these four dances are the best of your life". Or something engaging to keep the conversation going. Or she could say nothing. Too bad, I love a good sales job.
In order of priority: Nina may be the absolute fucking queen of people skills. Nina is highly attractive and she makes YOU feel attractive. I've missed you Nina.
She turned down $ for five bc she wanted $ for four. I told her to come back if she changed her mind, but I'm glad she didn't. She needed to smoke, and that's a personal turn off thing for me. If she'd massaged her words a little I'd have gone back with her. Again, glad I did not.
Another thing. I've had great dancers from average women. They had personality and confidence. And I've had shitty dances from gorgeous ones.
Some will say that good/nice girls usually don't become strippers.
A lot of these dancers have fucked-up lives and/or backgrounds and I don't expect for them to be well-adjusted; and many of them have little-education which combined w/ their youth/lack-of-life-experience means you often get what you get.
Seems many if not most SCs do not give the dancers any training whatsoever and dancers are allowed to pretty-much have any attitude they want - many of them are doing something they don't like (getting naked in front of strange-men) so IMO it's not surprising many of them will not have the best attitude.
Of course it makes sense and it's best for them to realize they can make more $$$ w/ a good-attitude b/c it *is* a people job, but it's kinda the nature of the beast/game
mdf....yes
I offered $100 for five songs and she wanted $100 to do four. I even told her I can't count. I almost feel for her. It's a real paradox. Take his money!
You make a good point. Some dancers simply don’t understand how to sell dances. The take it or leave it - sales technique is an all or nothing offer (for both you and her). It’s similar to a doctor with no bedside manner - as it can be abrasive.
There can be cultural differences in approach as well. Certain languages and cultures are more abrupt. If a dancer is new to the country, there can be many misunderstandings in her manner of communication.
I’ve also found that certain cultures are more comfortable with negotiating prices - and others will simply accept the stated price. I’m not sure any of this is pertinent to your situation - but it can explain some odd interactions.
That’s a main reason that most of my faves are experienced. Twenty one year olds haven’t developed conversation skills. They don’t need to.
If a dancer makes it 5 years on the job, she knows how to please.
@georgebailey - Let's say you offered $100 for 5 dances. She countered with $100 for 4 dances. In her mind, at $20 per dance, she's losing $100 every hour. Based upon her wording, I think this is the most likely answer. But given that most guys tend to escalate contact with every dance, a second factor could have been that she simply didn't feel comfortable doing 5 dances for you in particular, or perhaps for anyone in that particular environment.
She bypassed $100 for not wanting to dance an extra 3-minutes, instead she made zero - alright if she makes more $$$ than she knows what to do with, but most people don't make $100 in 15-minutes of work - she could've pocketed the $100 then gone about her hustle
Papi, w/o knowing the girl and the club you can't make that assumption. I've known dancers who would have a waiting list of guys at $100 for 4 dances. Personally I think it's stupid to handle your business in such a short sighted manner, but no one ever said intelligence was a necessary corollary of good looks.
So she could wait 12 min for a cigarette but not 15 min? Must of been one hell of a blunt she had waiting. Myself, I think "any more is a waste of my time" is pretty clear. Met more than a few dancers with that attitude.
"I wish more of these guys had people skills. I know I'm asking a lot, but I'm not asking too much. I was working at my club yesterday and the custie walked away from a deal. If he'd said the right thing he'd have had me. Instead of "I won't pay for 4 for $100 but I'll do 5 and any less is a waste of my money" he could have leaned over and whispered "these five dances could lead to more". Or something engaging to keep the conversation going. Or he could say nothing. Too bad, I love a good sales job."
i'm not sure how much experience you've had with strip clubs, and I've never tried to give a name to this before, but surely you've come across a dancer who's in serious money making mode? you can almost hear her counting down the dances and dollars until she meets her goal for the hour, she barely even has time to say hello to a customer.
I've even written about at least two dancers I've come across in that mode. in both cases I was prepared to spend at least $300 on each girl, but because they pissed me off so badly one girl only got $20 and the other got nothing at all. I don't buy dances, I hire regulars.
i have never and doubt I ever will meet a dancer who turned down $100 for a smoke. most girls, one reason they turn to dancing is because they have to pay for their smoking habit, and I don't mean nicotine,
I can see a dancer turning down $100 because she can make more money faster from someone else, but rarely for any other reason
@mdfmk888 - I think it would be best for georgebailey to come back and clarify things, because nowhere do I see him saying that she rejected 5 dances because she needed to smoke. he said she rejected 5 dances and that she wanted to smoke, but you're the one making the assumption that the two are related.
i wasn't there of course but i suspect she intended to smoke something stronger than a cigarette. either that or she had something else going on and wanting a cigarette was just a convenient excuse to get away, b/c you know a dancer would never lie
and I don't know how any dancer could repeatedly interrupt dances and just leave without being fired. so she was basically giving away free dances to guys? somehow I can imagine the club having a problem with that.
@mdfmk888 - okay, i have to admit i'm still trying to wrap my head around that thing with the chair you mentioned. in my entire life i've never seen anything like that, so maybe you could start a thread about the clubs you go to, because obviously you're describing a world i can't even imagine.
@georgebailey - you haven't given enough details for us to get a clear picture of what happened, but you are contradicting yourself. if smoking is a turn off for you, why did you ask her to come back if she changed her mind? and are you in the habit of asking dancers if they smoke before you get dances from them?
another thing I don't understand, is why you tried to bargain with this dancer. it's her decision whether she dances for you or not. it's her decision where she dances for you (for example, vip or on the floor), and what types of dances (ie mileage) she provides. if she has never met you before, you literally have no leverage with her at all. under the circumstances, you can either accept what she is selling, or find another dancer who is offering what you want (whatever that might be, at this point I don't know)
i can't see myself rejecting a dancer i'm interested in over $20. if $20 represents a meaningful sum to you then you might want to question whether you should even be in a club. dancers generally provide a much better experience if they don't feel like the guy they're dancing for is a cheapskate
It was a bad financial decision, for her. But this was a great discussion from different perspectives. What did I learn? If it isn't right walk away. If I had more time there was another dancer, maybe two, that could satisfy my desire for fun and fantasy. I'm not dating these girls, and most aren't my type outside the club. I'm not saying none, I've met some great attitudes and personalities packaged in a sexy body. This girl, the subject of my story, was probably strung out on something and couldn't make a good decision or her ss got on the way. It's not my problem. Never chase a bus, there's always another one coming.
25 comments
when you go to a club, there will be multiple attractive/hot women. its a strip club, they're selling looks/physical attractiveness
but the one thing that tends to vary is attitude. that's one of the reasons my CF is my CF. she's got a good attitude
I think you and I worked out a good sales deal before...
She turned down $ for five bc she wanted $ for four. I told her to come back if she changed her mind, but I'm glad she didn't. She needed to smoke, and that's a personal turn off thing for me. If she'd massaged her words a little I'd have gone back with her. Again, glad I did not.
Another thing. I've had great dancers from average women. They had personality and confidence. And I've had shitty dances from gorgeous ones.
A lot of these dancers have fucked-up lives and/or backgrounds and I don't expect for them to be well-adjusted; and many of them have little-education which combined w/ their youth/lack-of-life-experience means you often get what you get.
Seems many if not most SCs do not give the dancers any training whatsoever and dancers are allowed to pretty-much have any attitude they want - many of them are doing something they don't like (getting naked in front of strange-men) so IMO it's not surprising many of them will not have the best attitude.
Of course it makes sense and it's best for them to realize they can make more $$$ w/ a good-attitude b/c it *is* a people job, but it's kinda the nature of the beast/game
I offered $100 for five songs and she wanted $100 to do four. I even told her I can't count. I almost feel for her. It's a real paradox. Take his money!
Of course there's exceptions to everything, but the ones with people skills last the longest and make money.
There can be cultural differences in approach as well. Certain languages and cultures are more abrupt. If a dancer is new to the country, there can be many misunderstandings in her manner of communication.
I’ve also found that certain cultures are more comfortable with negotiating prices - and others will simply accept the stated price. I’m not sure any of this is pertinent to your situation - but it can explain some odd interactions.
I'm sure they say the same sorts of things about you.
SJG
Tasmin Archer - Sleeping Satellite (lyrics)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ky_gh14b…
If a dancer makes it 5 years on the job, she knows how to please.
SJG
"I wish more of these guys had people skills. I know I'm asking a lot, but I'm not asking too much. I was working at my club yesterday and the custie walked away from a deal. If he'd said the right thing he'd have had me. Instead of "I won't pay for 4 for $100 but I'll do 5 and any less is a waste of my money" he could have leaned over and whispered "these five dances could lead to more". Or something engaging to keep the conversation going. Or he could say nothing. Too bad, I love a good sales job."
I've even written about at least two dancers I've come across in that mode. in both cases I was prepared to spend at least $300 on each girl, but because they pissed me off so badly one girl only got $20 and the other got nothing at all. I don't buy dances, I hire regulars.
i have never and doubt I ever will meet a dancer who turned down $100 for a smoke. most girls, one reason they turn to dancing is because they have to pay for their smoking habit, and I don't mean nicotine,
I can see a dancer turning down $100 because she can make more money faster from someone else, but rarely for any other reason
i wasn't there of course but i suspect she intended to smoke something stronger than a cigarette. either that or she had something else going on and wanting a cigarette was just a convenient excuse to get away, b/c you know a dancer would never lie
and I don't know how any dancer could repeatedly interrupt dances and just leave without being fired. so she was basically giving away free dances to guys? somehow I can imagine the club having a problem with that.
another thing I don't understand, is why you tried to bargain with this dancer. it's her decision whether she dances for you or not. it's her decision where she dances for you (for example, vip or on the floor), and what types of dances (ie mileage) she provides. if she has never met you before, you literally have no leverage with her at all. under the circumstances, you can either accept what she is selling, or find another dancer who is offering what you want (whatever that might be, at this point I don't know)
i can't see myself rejecting a dancer i'm interested in over $20. if $20 represents a meaningful sum to you then you might want to question whether you should even be in a club. dancers generally provide a much better experience if they don't feel like the guy they're dancing for is a cheapskate