I was thinking I'd be a good mayor, but then if I had stiff competition from the opposition and they started digging dirt up on me, maybe I'd be fucked. Therefore I made a list of bad shit I've done over my lifetime. See what you think.
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I threw up on a sorority girl at a party in college.
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I bounced a check when I was 19 (bad fiscal management).
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At least 4 strippers know my real name (potential blackmail).
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I have more speeding tickets than I'd like to admit but only 2 over the past 16 years (carelessness).
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I've sent dick picks but only when requested (another blackmail potential).
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I constantly make fun of Lil Fishsticks (potential bulky call out).
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I make fun of Juice (potential issue with threatment of mentally handicapped).
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I once was thrown out of a bar (apparently peeing on the floor is frowned upon).
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I've flown the different states just to have sex (potential misuse of city funds).
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I once miscounted the votes in my homeowners association so the asshole everyone hates didn't get elected to the board (corruption).
Wait!?!? I sound perfext for politics!!!!!! Sign me up!!!
Comments
last commentYou are cleaner than than 95% of politicians.
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Got my vote LMFAO...I'm sure the rest of these faggots agree :)
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You are clean as a whistle! That's amateur stuff when compared to the shit most politicians have hiding in their closets!
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... And many hours of interior camera footage attending the clubs.
Plus, in N. C. all clubs are membership clubs. Scanning ID is common.
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Only live once
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Honest Vince - you might want to reword the part about loving kids... it might be misunderstood.
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maybe you should change the name of the governors mansion to Neverland Ranch?
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If you have never threatened to grab a woman by the pussy, then you are not qualified for political office. Nice try though.
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The mansion needs a Chuck E. Cheese franchise!
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Lol
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it's all good unles you get caught in bedbwith a dead girl or a live boy you should be just fine.
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Dead girl or live boy - love it!
Does it still count if the dead girl is a hooker?
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^^^I'd say same difference you are the one running for office thank god it's not me.
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^^ I don't think it matters (if the dead girl is a hooker) as long as you aren't caught having sex with her - as your town may have laws against that sort of thing...
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Maybe not, but you could defineitly be the hero in a modern day musical.
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Priest and boy.
Boy and Priest.
It's not weird cuz the boy's 19...
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^ ugh, fake vm made me laugh, again... had to take a shot to numb the self loathing. ;)
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Warhawks - possible the best current act on Howard Stern
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Shaillyn's way too corrupt for political office. However, he would make a terrific lawyer.
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OMG. I read your list and I have done (or pretty close) all but 3 of them.
I threw up on a sorority girl at a party in college. Close, it was my date to a formal.
I bounced a check when I was 19 (bad fiscal management). 19 or 20.
At least 4 strippers know my real name (potential blackmail). Yep
I have more speeding tickets than I'd like to admit but only 2 over the past 16 years (carelessness). My driving record has a few blemishes, but probably not that bad. I've had some recent hiccups.
I've sent dick picks but only when requested (another blackmail potential). Never sent a dick pic. My zoom isn't powerful enough.
I constantly make fun of Lil Fishsticks (potential bulky call out). Yep.
I make fun of Juice (potential issue with threatment of mentally handicapped). Nope.
I once was thrown out of a bar (apparently peeing on the floor is frowned upon). I've been thrown out of a hockey game for the same reason.
I've flown the different states just to have sex (potential misuse of city funds). Yep, but didn't get it.
I once miscounted the votes in my homeowners association so the asshole everyone hates didn't get elected to the board (corruption). Nope. But that's classic.
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Oh come on, shailynn, you and the Juiceman in a race for the presidency. It would be great for the country, certainly can't be worse than the 2 we just had. :)
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