So Who Understands Who Better?

Women understand men better, hands down.

How else could they empty the pockets of us pathetic losers, even after we've been warned?

In fairness, it's easier for them; we're pretty transparent.

:-/

^^^^^^^ Interesting POV and interesting example.

But how about in other situations? I mean sex is the forte for women. Do women really understand what men want in the broader areas of their lives?

My ex certainly did not.

SJG

Is it not obvious? ALL OF NATURE IS DIVIDED. The foxes come in two kinds, male and female, just like humans. How much does black have in common with white? I prefer to think of it as the yin-yang symbol; there is a little bit of black in white, and a little bit of white in black. In the same way, there is a little bit in the female which grants her knowledge of male, and a little bit in male which grants him knowledge of female.

In nature, there is no debate of who understands whom better than the other. In the natural world, they just know.

Women in general know men better no doubt. It doesnt mean they care about what motivates you if they are particularly self centered. You are just a piano to be played by girls like that.

Neither one. STRIPPERS probably understand male sexuality pretty well, though, because they are confronted with it every day at work. But that's like getting only one side of a story. It's a miracle that they don't all turn into man-haters. It's sort of like being a white police officer patrolling an all-black neighborhood. You're a cop, so you deal with crime and criminals all day. And since everyone around you is black, so too are all the criminals. After a few years you might become a huge racist... once again, because you're only seeing one side of the story. Believe it or not, most men do more with their lives than get lap dances and oogle girls in bikinis, but to a stripper, that's probably what it means to be a man. To a hammer everything looks like a nail.

As for civilian women and men, I think Bill Maher said it best: women's fantasies bore men and men's fantasies disgust women.

I understand that nobody understands San Jose guy because he's a weirdo

Future, yes I like your Ying Yang approach to this, I see it the same way.

Yes, I think BurlingtonHo has got it right again.

As I see it, if men really try they can understand women. But for women to understand men I think it far more difficult, that is to go beyond just sexuality. Most men have been raised by women and have obtained experience being around adult women. Usually this does not work the other way round.

One who first pointed this out to me is the Canadian novelist Margaret Atwood.

Do you think male authors can write good female characters?

Do you think female authors can write good male characters?

Might you suggest some examples?

SJG

John Hubner, on California Youth Authority
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ZoK-l1G…

Foster Care Group Home, Fullerton CA?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diD_SzOV…

Surviving A Group Home
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Kr7eJX0…

I agree that men and women don't have much in common. Though that doesn't mean there's never any common ground!

I do think that in historical contexts, 1. marrying for love (instead of security or for "property") and 2. coed activities (friends, schools, socializing) are a modern concepts and are still new.

I do agree that evolution built men and women with different strengths. Men may not totally understand women but it is possible for men to understand women enough to provide and anticipate women' needs, and that is generally *good enough*. Women tend to emotionalize externally whereas men tend to keep emotions much more bottled inside. We men tend to hold things close to us and intensely drag them back to our cave (or home office, workshop, garage).

In the Biblical sense, I think that both sexes have the capability to sense and anticipate the other's needs, so as to become one flesh, and serve each other ('s needs). So in that sense, I think we can understand one another. I subscribe to more traditional relationships and more traditional gender roles, YMMV.

What's not to understand?
Men are more mechanical in their sex drives and desires. Women want emotional involvement before sex in general. Women are more like a slow cooker and men are like a kettle approaching boiling point where at 212 degrees, a switch gets flipped on or off depending upon a temperature increase or decrease. Men like action and sports by about a 4 to one margin over women. Women are better at some things like social interactions and communications but men are better at spatial visualization and possibly math. Men tend to go towards what they are good at such as engineering and women tend to get jobs at what they are good at. Everyone is different though. These are just generalizations of past generations. Women have been going into business and finance apparently just as much as men or maybe more so. I can generalize all day based upon past tendencies of one gender choosing an occupation more frequently than the opposite sex but that's all it is. I tend to think people like doing something they are good at though.

Overall though, I try not to get surprised by the overall stupidity of people on the street when they are asked what I think are simple things but on videos, it seems like every common person in the US is an idiot. I'm wondering if people are editing videos so that no intelligent person gets interviewed or the more intelligent people skip the people shooting the videos. I hope it's the latter. In my own personal experience, I've met a lot more men than women who were better at math. I'm not saying there aren't idiots and geniuses of both sexes.

Do thing evolution gave men and women different strengths and different mental advantages. It's those differences that help us work together so well.

I'm reminded of an analogous set of differences when I'm out with the dogs. Humans have the advantage with color acuity but dog see better in low light or when tracking via scent or hearing. But together we can use our combined strengths that is greater than the sum of its parts.

I think some women have a real tough go at geometry and algebra II and lose interest there if not earlier. It seems to have something to do with men and spacial skills as it applies to imagining space in our heads. Since according to jackslash, men have a lot of empty space in our heads. ;-)

I'm sarcastically playing to stereotypes there, since the old "spacial skills" is a old meme. Whether or not it is biologically grounded I don't know. I do know that women early on in school do fairly well at math but at some point many fall out and pursue other studies. I don't know if we fully understand why. Some of it may be due to social conditioning about gender roles (we presume girls are bad at math, we tell them this, so perhaps they buy into it, which makes it self-reinforcing?).

It's funny how everyone seems intent on imagining that women are the ones who equate sex with love, but I think it's the opposite. I think women use sex to gain security, and once they have it, lose interest in sex. Men are the ones who gain feelings of self worth and feel loved and appreciated from sex. For women, It's either just physical (and doesn't make us feel more awesome as women bc we got laid), or it is part of a bigger need to gain security (boils down to physical security, like money and marriage). Also, men take break ups harder. I think it's bc it's girl code to be there emotionally for any girl who is going through a break up. Kinda like helping w moving is for men. Guys get so used to their SO just being there and being their buddy, that when they break up and needs emotional support the most, they don't have anyone. And don't tell me men don't need that.

As far as "understanding" goes, is understanding the issue? Or is it why people want to understand each other? Bc understanding for the sake of manipulating someone, or lying to someone can't really count.

You know how humans and apes have 99% of the same DNA ? Well, I think men and women are 99% the same psychologically, but the 1% makes things very interesting and that's the part we focus on.