Car jokes

avatar for skibum609
skibum609
Massachusetts

Name your favorites? F O R D = Fix or Repair Daily. F I A T = Fix it again Tony. BMW = What's the difference between a BMW and a human being? With a Hman Being the asshole is on the outside.

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avatar for l00ber
l00ber
7 yrs ago

Thanks shadow. I remember that song, which reminds me of how fucking old I am. Now I have to find me a JS style DS to make me feel young again.

avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
7 yrs ago

FORD: Found On Road Dead

avatar for SCPandit
SCPandit
7 yrs ago

FORD:For Our Retarded Daughter

avatar for Dominic77
Dominic77
7 yrs ago

F O R D = Flipped Over Rebuilt Dodge (funny, because I have a Mustang). P O N T I A C = Poor 'Ol Niceguy Thinks It's A Cadillac. H O N D A = Hold On, Not Done Accelerating.

J: What do you call a Norwegian prostitute? P: A Fjord Escort.

J: One lawyer asked the other lawyer, "What's the difference between a golf ball and a Ford?" P: The golf ball can be driven 300 yards.

avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
7 yrs ago

This is mean, car lives matter. :)

avatar for minnow
minnow
7 yrs ago

J A G U A R = Just Another Grand Under Auto Repairs R O L L S = Rich Ostentatious Luxury Loving Snob

avatar for BigPoppa99
BigPoppa99
7 yrs ago

BMW= Black Mans Wheels

avatar for skibum609
skibum609
7 yrs ago

Good one Dominic ^5.

avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
7 yrs ago

Acura- Asia's curse upon rural America Audi- accelerates under demonic influence Buick - Big ugly indestructible cat litter Chevrolet- cheap, hardly efficient, virtually runs on luck every time GMC- Got a Mechanic Coming? Jeep- Just eats every penny Mini- Moron Inside Notably Insane

avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 yrs ago

BMW= Break My Window (steal my radio)

avatar for minnow
minnow
7 yrs ago

Good ones, g95 , except for Buick mismatch. (Last letter) My suggestions:

B U I C K = Barfing Under Influence (of) Cash Killer / Big Ugly Indestructible Curb Kisser

C A D I L L A C = Can A Distinguished Intelligent Luxury Lover Act Cool

avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
7 yrs ago

"Cat killer". Good catch, minnow. My autocorrect is striving to prevent behavioral predictors for future serial killers.

avatar for Dougster
Dougster
7 yrs ago

Q: "What kind of car does skidum drive?" A: "I don't know. What kind of car do fags usually drive?"

Lol!

avatar for minnow
minnow
7 yrs ago

F O R D M U S T A N G = Fun On Recreational Drives Must Understand Sweet Talking And Nice Girls.

On above, can substitute "Sexual Tricks And Naughty Girls" in last 5 letters. How about that, Shadowcat !

avatar for deogol
deogol
7 yrs ago

BMW - Big Money Waster

avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
7 yrs ago

All right minnow. You know what works. :)

avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
7 yrs ago

I remember a commercial with a broken down Toyota on the side of the road, Along comes a car on the highway and they are spotted. The passenger says to the driver, don't stop, keep driving. They are thieves. Since when does a Toyota break down?

avatar for rane1234
rane1234
7 yrs ago

my focus is reliable...this is europeen propaganda or russian

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