Should I call her back?
Clackport
Washington
I've told this story, but I need to tell it again for context. Me and this female co worker were friendly towards each other. We weren't hanging out outside of work all the time, but we had each other's number. She is gorgeous too by the way. One night I go into a strip club, and I see her dancing. A little awkward for sure. After that it seemed like our relationship was a little different.
She wouldn't talk to me a lot at work, and she wouldn't respond to my texts. I'm guessing she was just really embarrassed at me finding out about her stripping. One day she sends me a work email basically saying she wasn't interested in me, as if I was trying to date her (which I was a little bit, but I didn't think I made it that obvious). She has my number and we work together, so she could have called/texted me or talked to me about in person, but she chose to send me a email. I go off on her in my email reply saying some immature stuff. I later apologize to her through email. The next time we see each other at work, she waves to me and says hi. So I'm thinking we've moved past the drama.
About a month later she got a new job somewhere else at a different location like 30 minutes away from where I work. 2 weeks after she left, I text her to see how she's liking her job. She responds with "who is this". At this point I'm thinking she either got a new number, or she has deleted my number. I don't respond.
Fast forward to this past Friday night. It had probably been a month since she gave me the "who is this". I go into the strip club that I had seen her dancing in. Keep in mind that she's only there every once in a blue moon, and I have other favorites in there, so I'm not there to see her, and I'm not expecting to see her there. Well she was there on Friday. She definitely saw me, I didn't tip her, or go talk to her. I was hanging out with some other strippers.
This morning I wake up to 4 missed calls from her number. The calls were at 3 am. I usually don't call numbers back I don't recognize unless they leave a message (keep in mind the last time I texted that number, she responded with "who is this", so I'm not even sure if it's her number anymore). That being said it seems too much of a coincidence for me to see her 36 hours earlier, and then her calling me. I'm thinking that is still her number. WTF is she calling me four times at 3am? Was she maybe drunk and didn't mean to call me?
She didn't leave a message, so I'm wondering if I should call her back?
Thoughts?
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Just text back something vague like "hey, saw your calls last night. What's up?"
Play it cool and do not get sucked into any drama.
@alabegonz- play it cool how?
Over thinking about it is a sign you know you're sure as hell not going to get it.
So do what you want, but this one you already lost so serve it up as practice on saying what you want to say and doing what you want to do.
I think you just say. "I got calls from this number last night, who is this?"
If she replies you can work the booty call, no response and you can move on with no harm done.
I wouldn't ask "who is this?". Seriously, just text what I wrote, then assume you won't hear from her. Practice your text game with this one. Don't be eager and reply back with jokes as often as possible.
The goal is to either end up out for drinks or have her over to your place, late at night. You want a fuck buddy from this one.
Ignore the calls and go back to the SC and have a good time like you normally do but stay away from her just like last time. Sounds like drama. If/when she finally comes to talk to you ITC make sure she def knows you're down for some fun but not down for any drama.
If you do want to play this out then act a little distracted when she comes over to talk to you. You should act like you WANT to pay attention to her but that there are too many others interesting things going on around you and you can't stop yourself from looking around at all the fun. Don't ask her out. If she asks to meet you OTC for anything at all (sex or dinner or movie, etc....) act busy. If she says how about next "whatever"-day tell her you already have plans that day. Don't be specific. Don't try to make up some huge story about your plans because plans can change, stories can be checked, questions can be asked. No need to lie and get caught in a lie. If you say you have plans your plans could be you sitting your ass at home in peace watching TV. Don't lie. Just don't be specific. If she questions your plans just give her the "bitch, I said I have plans" look. I'm of course being flippant. I'm not saying she's a bitch and don't call her one. Just give her the little wry half smile that says "I said I have plans and I don't really feel the need to explain myself to you".
If she does ask YOU out agree to something a week or 2 away and then don't call her. A day or 2 before the "date" call her to verify if you're picking her up, if y'all are meeting somewhere and the time, etc.... Other than that stay iff the damn phone. Calling her or texting her does not help you in the least bit. Leave her twisting in the wind. Women do this to men ALL the time so use it against her. Don't act like you are over joyed to finally go out with her. Don't tell her how you've always desired her, etc, etc.... Once she gets to know the real you and decides if she likes you or not then things can change and you can show interest. Until then she's still "auditioning" you trying to decide if you're worth dating or sleeping with.
NOW.........say all this transpires and the day or 2 before your outing you call to verify and she acts like "who is this?" all over again and starts sounding like she might not want to go out. If that happens quickly tell her that's fine because you've had other plans come up with some other friends but didn't want to cancel on her. The key is for her to know that you have a life and won't be sitting at home bored.
2 options here:
1- She's not interested and thinks you're stalking her
2- She can't decide if she's interested or not and trying to figure that out
3- If she was flat out interested she'd have already let it be known.
That's a lot to digest so I'll shut up now
Strippers hate to date customers and struggle with civilians. You're in the sweet spot.
If her looks are worth it; I'd say pursuit it as long as you go in not expecting anything and not getting involved in any way (emotionally; financially; etc) if she turns out to be more drama than she's worth – if she's too much of a head-case and not willing to meet you at least halfway; then not worth the headache.
SJG
https://sites.google.com/site/sjgportal/…
Mick Taylor
Red House
https://sites.google.com/site/sjgportal/…
You're welcome to make guesses on what you think will happen.
I wouldn't call.
I'd only text.
Something innocuous like: "Saw you called. Sorry I missed it. What's up?"
But I am thinking I'd be like you and want to know what's going on and not just drop it. As they say, curiosity killed the cat, so be careful.
As for the results of your next move, it will be more of the same.
"Why are you blowing up my phone?"
This would have ilicit a response of some kind, instead of the passive, did you call, but hey I like the drama so...