OT: cheating on significant other hypothetical question
footballguy
NC
I have a random hypothetical question and wonder what everyone thinks. When it comes to cheating, which (unless you consider them equal) do you consider worse when it comes to cheating for someone in a long term relationship/married?
1. Paying a stripper for sex
2. Paying the same stripper for sex on a somewhat regular basis, whether it's ITC or OTC
3. Having sex with a coworker on a somewhat regular basis
On one hand paying for sex with a stripper sounds worse. One reason is since you are paying, it's not necessarily a heat of the moment thing (such as going out to a bar with friends and having too much to drink and hooking up with someone). Its a very co axioms decision. But on the other hand, it's just sex, there's usually no emotional connection. Even if the PL likes the stripper, he knows that she only cares about the money and there is absolutely no chance of the relationship progressing (and in many cases the PL doesn't want a relationship out of it). So it's just about the sex.
As far as the sleeping with a coworker, on one hand you aren't paying for the sex so it doesn't seem as desperate or sleazy. On the other hand, you are still cheating and there is a much better chance of one (or both) parties of developing feelings down the road. There's definitely more of an emotional connection.
So what does everyone think, is one worse than the other?
1. Paying a stripper for sex
2. Paying the same stripper for sex on a somewhat regular basis, whether it's ITC or OTC
3. Having sex with a coworker on a somewhat regular basis
On one hand paying for sex with a stripper sounds worse. One reason is since you are paying, it's not necessarily a heat of the moment thing (such as going out to a bar with friends and having too much to drink and hooking up with someone). Its a very co axioms decision. But on the other hand, it's just sex, there's usually no emotional connection. Even if the PL likes the stripper, he knows that she only cares about the money and there is absolutely no chance of the relationship progressing (and in many cases the PL doesn't want a relationship out of it). So it's just about the sex.
As far as the sleeping with a coworker, on one hand you aren't paying for the sex so it doesn't seem as desperate or sleazy. On the other hand, you are still cheating and there is a much better chance of one (or both) parties of developing feelings down the road. There's definitely more of an emotional connection.
So what does everyone think, is one worse than the other?
18 comments
On your scale, 1, 2, 3 - I think the guilt factor is in the same order that you listed. 1 the least, 3 the most (at least to me). IMO I think I would fell much less guilt banging a stripper once, versus a co-worker that I would probably see on a regular if not daily basis, even if it was a one-time thing.
Now - what is NOT cheating - just getting a plain lapdance and a little groping, women need to calm down on this one! I know some women that feel just entering a strip club is cheating.
However it's only cheating if you get caught. :)
I have sex with strippers and I have also never cheated on, or been unfaithful with, my wife.
Lonely guys who don't have a wife to come home to crave that type of relationship, often so much so that it is inconceivable to them that anyone who does have that would seek affections elsewhere.
Guys who need a stable relationship, but have wives who are unattractive, unpleasant, etc., often yearn for partners who are better. in the ways that their current wives are lacking.
Guys who yearn for freedom from marital responsibilities often look with envy at single guys, sometimes including the very single guys who wish they had what the married guys do.
And yes, many guys who have great wives and who, from others' perspectives, should have no reason to be unhappy, may still crave the single life or even a simple assortment of pussy.
It is all a matter of perspective. But for those of you who are single, the fact that you are lonely and alone, perhaps because you have difficulty dealing with women in real life, doesn't give you any inherent moral high ground to judge those of us who are not. Find a wife and then come back and tell us how you feel after 10 years of marriage. You may be surprised to learn that the same urges that lead you into clubs today will bring you back to them after the bloom is off the marriage rose.
rockstar said he is open with his gf about sleeping around. He said his wife doesn't know about any of it so he is honest with his gf but lying to his wife which if what the majority of men on this site do.