Damn it, I'm not a cop!

4/9/2015 4:37:44 PM

I'm planning on hitting a number of clubs in NE Ohio in a month or so. My last similar "tour" went pretty well, although I had a couple of experiences with dancers who thought I was a cop.

At one club, a girl asked one of my buddies at our table if he was a cop; at another club a girl told me I was big "like a security guard or cop" (hint, hint); a girl at another club suggested the same thing. Finally, I was at a club where everything is usually on the menu with every girl and was nervously told by two dancers that we were pretty limited in the VIP "because of cameras." These couldn't all just be coincidences.

I was away from the area for three years, so I'm not nearly as visible in the club scene as I was at one time. That might be part of it. When I was younger, I used to get accused of being a cop every once in a while, but that was a long time ago.

Two questions: Do any of you ever have to deal with this? What's the best way to remove any suspicions?

29 comments

Latest

Papi_Chulo

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10 years ago

“… What's the best way to remove any suspicions …”

Show her your dick to let her know you mean business :)

Papi_Chulo

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10 years ago

I don’t recall getting this line in SCs too much – I’ve gotten it w/ escorts especially when I was younger and more clean-cut.

Perhaps they’d had a bout of raids when you last visited and the girls/clubs were a bit on edge – or perhaps LE tends to crack down in that area?

carlos_spiceyweiner

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10 years ago

As usual, Papi_Chulo, great points! I actually was thinking about whipping it out to prove a point. I'm hoping I may have gotten back in town right after an LE scare.

jackslash

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10 years ago

Strippers ask if you're a cop because they think that cops are not allowed to lie. Strippers are as wrong about this as they are about most things.

carlos_spiceyweiner

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10 years ago

Jackslash, yep, I've heard that before. They really think an undercover cop would respond, "You got me! I'm a cop!"

ime

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10 years ago

I get it once in a while I look a bit younger than I am and I'm pretty clean cut with short hair, but it's never been a real issue that spoiled a good time

chandler

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10 years ago

Tell them you're a very naughty cop looking for bad girls who deserve to be handcuffed.

tobala

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10 years ago

More when I was younger and in better shape than now. I usually go with a buzz cut in the summer and with a clean shave/ buzz cut goatee I have been accused of being LE.

sharkhunter

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10 years ago

I think I heard it one time. Maybe I turned down an offer for donuts and passed the cop test.

shadowcat

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10 years ago

When she called you a dick, I don't think she meant policeman. :)

carlos_spiceyweiner

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10 years ago

Shadowcat! That solves it!

grand1511

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10 years ago

Take off the badge

carlos_spiceyweiner

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10 years ago

The badge? Are you telling me I should quit pulling up to the club in a police cruiser as well?

GACA

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10 years ago

@Carlos Think you missed @grand's Biblical reference

shailynn

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10 years ago

I get that shit all the time. I guess because I look younger than my age, clean cut (although I have a beard and longer hair), not all tatted up....makes sense. It seems like I am a minority in the club anymore, usually it's someone that isn't white, or if they are white, they are either over 50 or if younger they are all tatted up.

Just like last weekend in a Detroit club, which is notorious for extras (which one isn't) the VIP attendant was complaining to the dancer that some customers and strippers were doing drugs at the bar, and he said "what idiots, I don't know why they just don't come back here and do that." As soon as he closes the curtain she asks "are you a cop?" What a fucking retard!

carlos_spiceyweiner

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10 years ago

@GACAclub - you'll have to explain that one to me

Shailynn - I hated hearing that too. I wonder how many real undercover cops have ever been asked that by a stripper?

PhantomGeek

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10 years ago

I've never had to deal with it, but years ago, a buddy and I hit one of the clubs. Pretty blonde was parked on his lap; she started talking about pot and getting high, then she stopped abruptly and asked him, "Are you a cop?" On the drive home, he couldn't figure out why she asked him that, at least not until I reminded him about what she was talking about.

As for removing any suspicions, the only thing that comes to mind is getting real forward with your hands in the VIP. Actions do speak louder than words.

warhawks

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10 years ago

"Badges? We don't need no stinkin' badges..."

I get asked all the time at clubs. But mostly at clubs that I don't frequent a lot. My regular places most of the girls know me and I know the managers and bartenders.

When I do get asked, Most thnk I'm some type of government agent. Mostly get asked if I'm an FBI agent for some reason.

shadowcat

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10 years ago

I once got asked if I was religious. When I replied no, she went on to tell me that she had had an abortion a few weeks ago.

rockstar666

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10 years ago

Never been asked if I was a cop. I don't sound or act anything like a cop. Most dancers think I'm a physicist or greeting card salesman. I get both all the time.

lopaw

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10 years ago

I get this a lot. Its rarely verbalized directly to me, at least not at first. Usually in a new club after I get a few dances , a dancer will mention that they thought I was a cop. But after some xxx dances with me they know better.

rizzle01

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10 years ago

I get this a lot but I do look pretty clean cut. I usually tell them fuck no and then tell them a story about something I did recently that a cop wouldn't like lol.

TheFword

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10 years ago

Been asked twice in the past few months in my regular club by girls I hadn't seen before. First time was when we were talking about what would happen in the VIP. I used the direct approach and asked if she would suck my dick. I assured her I wasn't a cop. ( I don't look like a cop, too old, too hairy, not in shape etc.) She was convinced, which left us to negotiate the price. then I got a great BJ.
The next time, a new to town dancer. I was pressing for what was on the menu. She asked a couple of times, didn't seem convinced. I told her to ask another dancer seated nearby that I have known for years. She took my word for it then without asking. Result: another great BJ.

Diva1975

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10 years ago

If that's you in your avatar spicy you look more like an IT need than a cop;)

Diva1975

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10 years ago

IT nerd

carlos_spiceyweiner

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10 years ago

Thanks, Diva! That's my boy Bubbles from the awesome series "Trailer Park Boys"

carlos_spiceyweiner

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10 years ago

Diva, what would make you think a guy might be a cop? What's the best clue a regular guy can play that he's not? Thanks!!

sharkhunter

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10 years ago

I think if a hot dancer asked me if I was a cop, I might say it's funny that you asked, I was just thinking about taking you back to my place for a strip search.

dogsun

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10 years ago

I think part of the problem is the area you're in. As a clean cut white guy in NE Ohio, you tend to stand out in pretty much every club here. Especially in the Akron scene. Imade constantly bwing accused of being a cop. I've started dressing down and not shaving to fit on more and that has seemed to help some.

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