The waitress is the hottest girl in the place and you will only get a dance from her, because all the dancers are subpar. You know your odds are slim here.
Your best buddy at the club is the dj because he is playing all the headbanging music that you can relate to from your youth. You really enjoy this nuance because the girls can't provide any satisfactory interaction. So you end up tipping the dj more than anyone else at the club.
A dude dressed in a white, 3 piece polyester suit shows up as a patron.
Swear to God I just witnessed this very scenario, yet my only embellishment will be the 3 pieces for the suit. This guy wanted to ball in his fancy get up! Love it!
1) The DJ comes in carrying a box full of 8 track tapes.
2) All drinks are served in plastic cups.
3) You are the only white person in the place.
4) 2 dudes are stuffing $1 bills into the pussy of the toothless fat bitch on stage.
5) The manager pleads with you to not leave
6) You don't even try to avoid the pot holes in the parking lot trying to get out of there.
1) The bartenders used to strip there 20 years ago. Occasionally they still do. Ewwwww.
2) Half the customers look like they couldn't afford a single lap dance
3) Half the dancers (or 75% by weight) are "plus sized"
4) The roof leaks into the club when it rains, and has for several years
The urinal is detached from the wall and laying on the floor next to the capped off drain and water supply.
The men's bathroom is closed for repair, and all the male customers are using the one, open to the entire room, in the girl's dressing room. Escorted by the female bartender.
The floor has a soft spot that everybody knows to avoid, where the flooring underneath is rotting.
The open door to the dressing room includes a view of needles and surgical rubber in the counter.
The bartender, upon seeing you walk in, says "Your favorite whore is here tonight."
The decor looks like something out of a Munsters episode. And it's April.
1) There are more guys playing pool than watching dancers.
2) All of the dancers are outside smoking, leaving two employees in the club -- the bartender and the server who's now doubling as a dancer.
3) Asteroids, Joust, and other old-school stand-up arcade games are getting more money than the dancers.
4) The whale of the night looks like he just spent his social security check.
5) The best dancer would give a trailer park a bad name -- and she's well past retirement age, to boot.
1. the stage is two plywood platforms with carpeting and no pole
2. all the dancers get on the stage (see above) every hour for an "all skate"
3. the DJ plays "the Rodeo song" for the all skate
4. Dancers beg you to take them to VIP to avoid the all skate
5. The best booth in VIP has a pile of sound equipment in it
6. the dancer's bar bill exceeds what they make in tips
7. one of the regular girls is possibly brain damaged from drugs but nobody asks her to leave
1) When the stage is just four pieces of wood, much like a sandbox but without the sand.
2) When the PLs leave the dancer in VIP so they can get a beer or a joint.
Dougster, definitely a clone of Rickyboy if not the real live person. The dude had his jacket off an he was carrying it over his shoulder, an then he would look at his gold pocket watch as if he had some place to go. He ordered a double shot of scotch to sip on at the bar and then I left.
Luv_women, yeah the 3 generations comment is way too funny!
35 comments
Latest
Swear to God I just witnessed this very scenario, yet my only embellishment will be the 3 pieces for the suit. This guy wanted to ball in his fancy get up! Love it!
http://snakeandjakes.com/
2) All drinks are served in plastic cups.
3) You are the only white person in the place.
4) 2 dudes are stuffing $1 bills into the pussy of the toothless fat bitch on stage.
5) The manager pleads with you to not leave
6) You don't even try to avoid the pot holes in the parking lot trying to get out of there.
Yes. It's been closed for a few years now.
2) Half the customers look like they couldn't afford a single lap dance
3) Half the dancers (or 75% by weight) are "plus sized"
4) The roof leaks into the club when it rains, and has for several years
The men's bathroom is closed for repair, and all the male customers are using the one, open to the entire room, in the girl's dressing room. Escorted by the female bartender.
The floor has a soft spot that everybody knows to avoid, where the flooring underneath is rotting.
The open door to the dressing room includes a view of needles and surgical rubber in the counter.
The bartender, upon seeing you walk in, says "Your favorite whore is here tonight."
The decor looks like something out of a Munsters episode. And it's April.
Lmfao
2) All of the dancers are outside smoking, leaving two employees in the club -- the bartender and the server who's now doubling as a dancer.
3) Asteroids, Joust, and other old-school stand-up arcade games are getting more money than the dancers.
4) The whale of the night looks like he just spent his social security check.
5) The best dancer would give a trailer park a bad name -- and she's well past retirement age, to boot.
2. all the dancers get on the stage (see above) every hour for an "all skate"
3. the DJ plays "the Rodeo song" for the all skate
4. Dancers beg you to take them to VIP to avoid the all skate
5. The best booth in VIP has a pile of sound equipment in it
6. the dancer's bar bill exceeds what they make in tips
7. one of the regular girls is possibly brain damaged from drugs but nobody asks her to leave
2) When the PLs leave the dancer in VIP so they can get a beer or a joint.
Luv_women, yeah the 3 generations comment is way too funny!
Took me about 3 minutes to finish my rum and coke that was served in a plastic cup before I left.