tuscl

ATF Breakups

JohnSmith69
layin low but staying high
Sunday, December 7, 2014 5:14 AM
I'm getting depressed. Are the breakups always full of betrayal and hurt feelings? Is it ever handled in a mature and responsible manner?

42 comments

  • Dougster
    •
    10 years ago
    Sorry to hear that. They are tough. Incredible tough. Just ask stevie-girl. When it happened to him he went into a funk and kinda let himself go. One of he hardest things in the world.
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    10 years ago
    Dougster, your love and concern for Steve is truly touching. Thank you. I didn't mean to suggest that I'm in the middle of a break up. My relationship with my DS will likely last until I've spent all of my kids' inheritance. I just meant I'm depressed at the thought of it ending badly one day.
  • londonguy
    •
    10 years ago
    You are getting depressed at the thought of your relationship with a stripper ending badly one day? Seriously?
  • Dougster
    •
    10 years ago
    Yeah, when it's years off... does seem a little fishy
  • Duke69
    •
    10 years ago
    #1 its a stripper not a marriage #2 just be happy it happened #3 yes they end bad most all relationships do...y u thank it ended ? #4 im sure somebody..yea! maybe u ? Will end well...it could happen...people do win the Lottery ...
  • Dougster
    •
    10 years ago
    Oooops, forgot. In stevie-girl's case she wasn't a stripper, she was a hooker, er, sugar baby, er civie. So it's entirely different.
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    10 years ago
    Londonguy, ok depressed was too strong of a word. Sorry I'm not in touch with my emotional self this am. I only get depressed about sports teams loosing. I'm just a little surprised that all of the breakup stories shared recently seemed to have this strong sense of betrayal in them and I wondered if that is typical.
  • Duke69
    •
    10 years ago
    Yes it is...mine just up and left....stopped texting me and left me homless and vanless...took me a few months to get back on my feet bro
  • jackslash
    •
    10 years ago
    It's easy to break up with a stripper. Just stop giving her money.
  • deogol
    •
    10 years ago
    Yea, look at it from her point of view - she lost a good paying customer. You were a good paying customer and not a "problem" customer, right? (wakes up) Oh shit? Was I channeling stripper web for a second there?
  • Duke69
    •
    10 years ago
    Like^
  • Clubber
    •
    10 years ago
    JS69, Don't listen to all the BS. Unless one has had a real relationship (rare, agreed) with a dancer, they just don't know. Many don't even believe it can happen. Call me a PL or whatever, but I just look at it as two diverse humans finding that common bond that transcends the diversity.
  • Dougster
    •
    10 years ago
    One of the toughest things in life... Even capable of driving people into a funk...
  • alabegonz
    •
    10 years ago
    Breakups, I thought I finally broke up with my CF. Turns out I was there yesterday to pick her and drive her to work. Told her "Can you talk to the bouncer and get me a pass?" She did exactly that. I was in there watching and enjoying the show, she was there doing her thing. Around 12:30AM she came around and asked me for a dance, it was a slow night for her. So we went there and had a little fun. I dunno. It's weird, can't really describe what's going with us right now. We seem to be caught in something we can't explain. It's soooo wrong.
  • Dougster
    •
    10 years ago
    In the top three most traumatic life experiences: 1. Death of a parent, sibling or a child 2. Death of a spouse 3. Hooker moves on 4. Divorce 5. Financial ruin
  • Subraman
    •
    10 years ago
    "It's weird, can't really describe what's going with us right now. We seem to be caught in something we can't explain. " alabegonz, I've been there too. In retrospect, only part of it was unexplainable. For me, I had myriad conflicting feelings, and struggled with them as I did an introspective of myself, my needs, and what's best for me and best for her. For her part, she saw my expiration date was around the corner and used me for the last bit she could get out of me -- rides, drinks, dances, whatever. Only one of us was confused about what was going on :)
  • Diva1975
    •
    10 years ago
    Exactly, I have a guy who comes to see me. I am absolutely his ATF and now he is crying poverty, (apparently when we met in 2012 he won a cash settlement and used it to get his hooks into me.) when the money runs out, strippers run. Why else would I be attracted to a 68 year old who doesn't take care of himself. He's so fat and says he wants to lose weight, yet every time we go out to eat, he orders a western cheeseburger with bacon and onion rings on the side. As you men know, everything you say to us is strategic, so I told him that crying pauper does nothing for me. The only think I can think of for him telling me he's poor every chance he gets, is to engender sympathy. I told him it scares me away as I am getting older and am looking for financial security. Well that threw him for a loop. I even went so far as to insult him for buying me a piece of costume jewelry when he still had the bulk of his cash settlement. If it's not the real thing, we don't want it guys. I am still depending on this man for rides, but like the last guy said, it's all about what's most useful and I am looking to replace him.
  • Dougster
    •
    10 years ago
    Geesh... that is sure harsh, diva. Maybe he was in a funk because his hooker, er, sugar baby, er, hooker moved on. Hard not to kinda let yourself go when that happens. Diva: "yet every time we go out to eat, he orders a western cheeseburger with bacon and onion rings on the side." Again pretty harsh. Isn't that just what "foodies" do?
  • PhantomGeek
    •
    10 years ago
    John, first off, something you have to remind yourself on a daily basis -- hell, make this your mantra -- is that from day one with your DS, it's always been a business transaction. No more, no less. I'm sure she's remembering this; it sounds like you aren't. Second, she's young. She has a full life ahead of her. Is she going to be by your side when you finally retire? When you move into the nursing home? In all likelihood, no. She's going to be living her own life, whether it's finishing school, starting a new, real, and mainstream career, settling down with a boy closer to her own age, or what-have-you. This will be her life, and you won't be a part of it. Third, is it or will it be really betrayal? Or will it be that you -- and these other guys suffering from the break-up blues -- are feeling and acting more like a melodramatic teenage girl who can't have the one true love of your life? Are you going to be Marcia Brady hating on Davey Jones because he has a wife? Are you going to be Joanie Cunningham throwing a fit at The Fonz because he didn't get home in time to take you to the prom, even if he had a fairly good excuse why he was late? Fourth, carpe diem, man. Seize the day! Seize that moment! Enjoy, rejoice, and cherish what you have now because this is Life -- you will not have it forever. And to waste time mourning something you haven't even lost yet is just a waste.
  • alabegonz
    •
    10 years ago
    "Only one of us was confused about what was going on :)" My confusion was, whenever I am with my CF my mind is somewhere thinking of this new dancer I met two weeks ago. If she hadn't called me up yesterday night I would have been hanging out with the new stripper, who also has an Xotic account, but I won't post it here. She has this look in her eye that somehow melts me. Eyes better than this awesome dancer ( [view link] ) somehow I lost due to my stupidity. Thing though is that I have two faves (CF2 and CF3) where she dances and the last time I was there both dancers were there, so I had to choose the other dancer (CF2) instead of her (CF3). With my CF, it's about her shit now and not about the bullshit she was peddling me when we first met. It's all about supporting her emotional dimension, making sure she's still in one piece. I dunno man, I should move on and meet new people, club in different locations, don't stay in one place and stick with one girl. Like last night, I was already bored around 12:10AM and was telling her I am going to bail in 20 minutes, leave her there. Get a dance and call it a night. "You can't go, I need you to drive me home." "I dunno, you can find someone to get you home." "Come on, I'll cash out and do tipouts sooner than these bitches." Turns out she I had to wait longer than I should have. Simply I can't do this kind of things.
  • alabegonz
    •
    10 years ago
    "when the money runs out, strippers run" Strippers also walk away for other reasons.
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    10 years ago
    PG, thanks for the advice. I hope I'm not as pathetic as I may have suggested about my DS. I know it's business, and I am just having fun while I can. I know it will end, and I know there's another stripper on the next corner when it does end. Notwithstanding all of the foregoing, however, it seems to me that two adults who have been having sex with one another for weeks, months or years, ought to be able to end things in a civil and mature way. I've ended many business relationships over the years but I do so in an honest and up front manner. I don't just stop accepting phone calls, or stop responding to emails. Instead, U communicate and explain why things are ending so as to hopefully minimize any hard feelings and end things as positively as possible under the circumstances. I think that PL ATF relationships should be ended in a similarly kind manner instead of one party just dropping off the face of the earth.
  • slaux.pas
    •
    10 years ago
    Wow juice had something not retarded to say. I guess even a broken clock is right twice a day. Stupid clack in my VCR only right at noon and midnite. A retard made my VCR
  • slaux.pas
    •
    10 years ago
    JohnSmith69 retard. You should listen to Juice. Dont fall in love with a girl that has a disease that will make your dick fall off. If you do your a retard. With no dick.
  • Diva1975
    •
    10 years ago
    Dougster, yes I was harsh, but that's the reality of the situation. And I am his sugar baby silly. That's the problem like you gentlemen on this site you want the most whilst giving the least. Unfortunately for us dancers, we want whales who give a lot and expect next to nothing in return. As for the fucking cheeseburgers, give me a fucking break. We eat at the number one diner in New Jersey. I order a salad with raw tuna on top. Surely he could do better than a cheeseburger with BACON I said BAICON on as a slab of meat with cheese and bread. Disgusting
  • alabegonz
    •
    10 years ago
    " I think that PL ATF relationships should be ended in a similarly kind manner instead of one party just dropping off the face of the earth." Agreed, I believe in that too. Women have their emotional dimension and men somehow act silly in front of them. Not a good combination, compound that with money and there you go.
  • Dougster
    •
    10 years ago
    What's wrong with bacon? BACON? Any restaurant with a bacon stigma is definitely out of my league. Worthy of BOYCOTT, IMO, in fact!
  • mikeya02
    •
    10 years ago
    "We eat at the number one diner in New Jersey"..........LOL...Does it have an A rating?
  • Dougster
    •
    10 years ago
    Ok, so maybe we are getting closer to a definition of "foodie" now. Before the best I got was someone who likes to eat. But now it's someone who likes to eat but not BACON in fancy restaurants?
  • Diva1975
    •
    10 years ago
    I love you Dougster! Yes in an alternate universe where women didn't gain weight I would love bacon too. But don't complain about being fat, and then go to eatijg bacon. Its disgusting.,and if you must know, it's a diner in between Princeton and West Windsor. Definite 4 stars my favorite place to hang out! Love you Nadui! See yiubtinmomrrie:)
  • warhawks
    •
    10 years ago
    2 Hours Ago • In the top three most traumatic life experiences: 1. Death of a parent, sibling or a child 2. Death of a spouse 3. Hooker moves on 4. Divorce 5. Financial ruin I've had all of these happen to me in the past year, EXCEPT for the "death of a spouse." But, hey... There's always next year! lol.
  • Diva1975
    •
    10 years ago
    Yes Miley 02 it's the Americana in east windsor on rt 130. If you're in the area, Check it out. Just dont order the western cheeseburger in front of your ATF though! Lol
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @diva1975 ...I guess that the big disfunctional problem with strip clubs. Seems to be mired in a culture of "trying to get something for nothing" on both sides of the fence. But I still think strippers a driving that culture forward with too many ROBs. Who absolutely get a sense of accomplishment by "getting one over" on a customer. But it's a horrible business model. I agree anyone who meets a stripper in ITC better expect that relationship to be strictly a financial one no matter how long the duration.
  • mikeya02
    •
    10 years ago
    Pretty nice place Diva........but sorry, not only would I order the Western, I would add a fried egg to it. Awesome
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    10 years ago
    "I love you Dougster" Never thought I'd hear a woman on here say that.
  • Duke69
    •
    10 years ago
    Lol
  • alabegonz
    •
    10 years ago
    "He's so fat and says he wants to lose weight, yet every time we go out to eat, he orders a western cheeseburger with bacon and onion rings on the side. As you men know, everything you say to us is strategic, so I told him that crying pauper does nothing for me." Hard to believe this one. Nah, I don't believe this one. Strippers fall for guys who dress like hobos and have no money.
  • xxxrated
    •
    10 years ago
    ATF all time favorites...A Relationship with a stripper is a strange one. I Just had my ATF OTC for 5 years change her phone number and cut off all contact with me. It was nothing i did. It was some type of money issue or family issue. Just all of a sudden Quit her stripper job cut off all contact with me (very strange) but, shes a stripper. However, there are so many strippers,escorts,and Tijuana Brothels that i just about forgot about this girl........
  • JamesSD
    •
    10 years ago
    I love bacon. It's not great for your arteries, but it's fairly low cal. I'm guessing divas fatty has a sugar addiction. It's very hard to get fat on bacon.
  • PhantomGeek
    •
    10 years ago
    John, in an ideal world, with rational and mature people, being able to say good-bye and explain why would be great. But that's in an ideal world with rational and mature people. Sometimes it is just easier to cut the ties and walk away though. Here's hoping that when the time comes, you and your DS can part on far better terms than most.
  • Clubber
    •
    10 years ago
    Bacon, excellent for low carbs!
  • magicrat
    •
    10 years ago
    Mine got out of the business, got a degree and is functioning in the real world these days apparently. She recently had a birthday and I sent her a happy birthday wish via Facebook. She did respond to the message and said she had thought of me recently when she saw something that had a common meaning for us. I haven't seen her in at least 4 years. I have a CF now, but she is still ATF without a doubt.
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