self destruction, redux

avatar for LMN
LMN
I seem to be on a downward spiral lately.

Last night was not as fun as I hoped. The 2 strippers came over and really wanted to "party. " I personally just wanted to stay in get wrecked and fuck them. They wanted to go out. I guess my "favorite" told her friend I occasionally take her to high end nightclubs and bars. I figured, whatever, may as well so we took off to a nearby "lounge" I like.

I find nothing more pathetic than going out with strippers so I was already in a bad mood about it.

I popped 30mg's of zolpiderm which was a very, very bad idea. After about 2 hours and 4 double rum and cokes, I was barely able to sit up straight and hallucinating a bit. The strippers, who were already completely shitfaced as they finished a bottle of Patron between the two of them already were oblivious to how demolished I was. The guy I usually buy coke from actually works at this lounge so I got a ball from him, hoping this would help me wake up a bit.

I don't remember much after this. I remember bits and pieces:

- doing coke in the bathroom
- barely being able to stand up from the table
- my usual waitress telling me that my drinks were on the house (I go to this place like 4x/week)
- doing more cocaine in the bathroom and feeling very uncomfortable, a high blood pressure pained feeling, lying down on the floor a bit
- at one point one of the strippers looks at me and says "are you okay?"

I don't know how I got home safely. I drove back which was dumb. Thankfully my car isn't totaled. The strippers crashed on my couch after I fucked them (I guess I fucked them?).

Today I feel worse than usual. I hate black outs. I feel fried. Like my brain can't produce any more dopamine or seratonin.

I'm not sure what to do any more with myself.

11 comments

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avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
11 years ago
Well, if you're going to bore us with the same three note song......
Try sticking your head up your ass..see if it fits!

avatar for gawker
gawker
11 years ago
Downward spiral? How about cliff diving? I am not opposed to some pharmacological assistance, but man..... You're over the top. Suicide by over-indulgence is not unique, but make sure that's really what's in your best interest. I assume you're trying to kill yourself, aren't you?
avatar for LMN
LMN
11 years ago
Gawker

I attempted suicide once before as an angsty teenager via pill overdose. They found me seizing and pumped my stomach at the ER in time.

I'm not actively attempting suicide but I don't particularly care if I live or die either.

avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
11 years ago
^^^^C'mon man, Dougster likes you
avatar for goonster
goonster
11 years ago
At his current rate he's got 6 months to a year unless somebody intervenes.
avatar for zipman68
zipman68
11 years ago
I think the TUSCLers should band together to help LMN dude.

I think the LMN dude needs to shift his self destructive tendencies in a more whimsical direction. Leave out the Ambien LMN dude. Commit to a lower amount of coke, but add 96 twinkies to the mix.

Yes, I'm suggesting you and your stripper friend have a TWINKIE EATING CONTEST. After you get all strung out on blow and twinkies be sure to film the chick doing something twisted. Yes -- a TWINKIE CREAMPIE!!!

Pay the chick $1K or $2K to insert one of twinkies in her snatch for a photo. Write "LMN RULZ" on the belly in Twinkie cream my brother. Then post that shit.

I swear that will be way more fun than takin' all the drugs you claim to take. From there, just ramp up on the twinkies and down on the drugs.
avatar for ime
ime
11 years ago
He may be able to talk the slow girl who makes the fries at his work into it.

avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
11 years ago
LMN must write some super emo shit on his Facebook page
avatar for ime
ime
11 years ago
Until his mom makes him turn off his computer for the night
avatar for zipman68
zipman68
11 years ago
Now now ime. I'm sure LMN's parents just avoid the basement. I'm sure LMN has all the empty bottles of Bud Light, Zima, and Pepe Lopez he drinks lined up along the wall of his man cave. I bet he has a sweet Xbox set up -- he needs to relax after makin' the curly fries and onion rings all day long.

Seriously though, LMN dude...some of us are doubting you. You can become a TUSCL legend by merely spending some chump change to get some o' your strippers to take groovy photos. I know you can do it -- I know you're actually a super-rich, hard-charging, ultra-rich dude. You can get and post some ultra-twisted photos for your TUSCL bros.
avatar for IanSmith
IanSmith
11 years ago
Until your blackouts exceed two week time spans then you have nothing to worry about.
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