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What We Really Mean: Customer-to-English Translations

Avatar for chandler
chandlerBlue Ridge Foothills
  1. "Maybe later" = You're ugly - buzz off.
  2. "Sure, have a seat" = Please rub my dick.
  3. "Can I buy you a drink?" = Please rub my dick for $6.
  4. "I haven't seen that girl before." = I wonder if she'd rub my dick.
  5. "I can't say too much longer." = Rub it with both hands.

Comments

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Avatar for Clubber
Clubber•
  1. Where is the ATM? = I've had way to many beers and now I am going to get stupid!
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Avatar for tropicalH2O
tropicalH2O•
  1. I enjoy very liberal dances = Are you naughty enough?
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Avatar for AbbieNormal
AbbieNormal•
  1. Can I buy you a drink? = can I lower your inhibitions even further with alcohol so you'll rub my dick?
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Avatar for chandler
chandler•
  1. "Is she your girlfriend?" = Let's have group sex!
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Avatar for davids
davids•
  1. (Often spoken by old men) Yeah, I could make friends with/date/have sex with young, beautiful women any time I want. I just pay them money because it is good manners and ethical = I know I won't have a hope in hell with them if it wasn't for the money I was spending on them.
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Avatar for davids
davids•
  1. I don't care if stripper like me or not. I don't want to date them or make friends with them = The second I think it has happened or the second I think there is even a slight possibility it will happen I will be on the top of the world and post to TUSCL bragging for all to hear! But I don't care. Really. Why don't you believe me?
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Avatar for chandler
chandler•
  1. "I'm gonna go take a piss." = I'm gonna go wipe this stain off my pants.
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Avatar for davids
davids•
  1. Oh, I'm just here to relax and have some fun = I have trouble interacting with women in regular night clubs b/c I think I am old, unattractive, pathetic, fat, whatever: So I come here where I can use money as a crutch to prop me up and as a safety to avoid rejection.
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Avatar for AbbieNormal
AbbieNormal•

  1. Are you new here? = Have the other girls warned you about me yet?

  2. Have you been dancing long? = can I break you in?

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Avatar for chandler
chandler•
  1. "Did you just get here?" = Nobody's sucked your nipples yet?
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