tuscl

Learning curve for OTC

Lone_Wolf
Arizona
Friday, January 4, 2013 10:03 AM
In 2012 I ventured into going OTC with a few Dancers. Overall the experiences were fun and exciting but I did end up blowing a ton of cash I didn't need to due to my lack of experience. I'll preface this by emphasizing my understanding that the foundation of these type OTC relationships is MONEY and nothing more. Lessons learned: There should be no assumption of what is going to happen OTC unless it is candidly, but tactfully, discussed beforehand. A "private show" to me may mean to include sex. To her, it may mean the same show she gives me in the club just alone. I've learned to be very candid/specific as to what I want OTC. Under all circumstances, she's seeing me for money. Although, awkward, it is best to establish a fair amount that will satisfy us both before the visit. In fact, the provider always seemed more comfortable with candid negotiations versus just letting it play out. All providers eventually hit me up for cash to help them in some real, or imaginary, emergency. The cash I gave them was never re-paid in any form including sex. A big waste of money. Be prepared, they will ask in situations that make it almost impossible to say no to. Now, when such requests are made, I tactfully ask for OTC up front. I gave way too much personal information out at first. Now days, with just a name and face it is extremely easy to track someone down and fuck with their life. Now I use caution to what is I tell them and I use things like Google Voice to cover my tracks. Any others I may have missed?

14 comments

  • Revo
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    12 years ago
    Did you have some try to track you down and fuck with you? If somewhat did they do?
  • Lone_Wolf
    •
    12 years ago
    @Revo: No, never even a hint at that. While talking to the first one though, it occurred to me she knew my full name, where I work, and many other details. The realization that this person could make my life hell if so inclined hit me across the face like a board. I was very naive man.
  • Chemicaltoilet
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    12 years ago
    Damn man that sounds rough.... maybe you should try escorts for a while. Seems like these strippers are taking your business for granted.
  • Lone_Wolf
    •
    12 years ago
    @toilet: The experience and this forum have taught me a lot. I don't waste money like I used to at all.
  • Estafador
    •
    12 years ago
    I never gave any sexual performer my real name ever. I was raised to be a paranoid schizophrenic
  • Revo
    •
    12 years ago
    I have to tell you I have been lucky. I have met some really hard core strippers. But the OTC I have now is really cool. Don't get me wrong I am not that experienced, and she is not perfect. But I have had zero bullshit or hustle from her. In fact she told me point blank that she did not like what some of the other girls do in this area and that she wants no crazy drama. Of course this is kind of new and time will tell. But so far so good. I will say going back to your first issue. I have had my share of ROBs ITC with other crazy strippers. And I have lost my share of money, for poor service. Always ask up front, when I did not I always got fucked. Plus it makes everyone more at ease and fuck the sensibilities. They are sex workers after all.
  • Revo
    •
    12 years ago
    I consider myself paranoid also. I make sure I always cover my bases. Wolf: I have just gotten myself a googlevoice account and love it. How do you send and receive texts from your personal cell phone through your googlevoice account?
  • deogol
    •
    12 years ago
    "I never gave any sexual performer my real name ever. I was raised to be a paranoid schizophrenic " Fucking eh right!
  • Tiredtraveler
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    12 years ago
    It is simpler to have a burn phone
  • she_is_covfefe
    •
    12 years ago
    When I was dancing in southeast Virginia (AKA, the no lapdance, no touching bikini clubs) I used to do lots of OTC. I was always upfront about that there shall not be any sexual contact from me to the customer, or vice versa. There was contact (eg. heavy grinding, etc), but nothing that could be considered sex (handjobs and blowjobs are considered sex, not just fs). Of course some complained, some liked the idea. I never asked customers for extra money because I treat this as a business, and see the customers as customers not friends or sugar daddies. I never promised anything I wasn't going to do. Plus, the fact that I also took credit cards as a form of payment and had a business license (the license was completely visible in my car window) was a sign that I was being legit. I had many repeat business, and I was referred to others constantly. To the "they are sex workers after all". You know how condescending that sounds? You make it sound as if all dancers are just double digit high school dropouts with five different baby daddies and a meth addiction. The same way I don't see y'all as PL. Why would I do that? It's not my call to do that. There are few of us who are doing this to supplement our incomes, for retirement, and for grad/law/med school. Do not generalize, please.
  • Revo
    •
    12 years ago
    My point is that sex workers are not going to be offended by stating what you want up front. I have always gotten a good response from that. Over many years. Many guys go into this afraid to ask for what they want. And that leads to guys getting ripped off and girls losing business because of miscommunication. This means sex workers are used to talking about sex. Just like a doctor would be used to talking about your personal medical issues. All that stuff about baby daddies and meth, you mentioned not me. Try not to look for something to be offended about.
  • kingcripple
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    12 years ago
    i always assumed otc was sex. shows how little i actually know
  • she_is_covfefe
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    12 years ago
    @Kingcripple: I had OTC appointments that involved things like going to NBA games (you know, as an arm candy), fancy parties, and things like that.
  • azdd
    •
    12 years ago
    Hey LoneWolf thanks for telling your OTC story and lessons learned. I've only had a handful of OTC experiences, but that's because I've been very selective. I don't even bring up OTC until I've developed a good ITC comfort level with the dancer. My opinion is that slightly older dancers that are either married or have SOs are much safer OTC bets because it's always clear that it is only a business transaction, and they don't have any reason to jerk you around. Now here are some key things to consider IMHO: 1. The entire proposition is more risky for her than you. She has to feel safe about being alone with you, and that the agreed upon boundaries won't be pushed. If she doesn't trust that you will honor that, OTC is dead before it gets started. 2. Make the OTC pitch a casual value proposition. You are offering fair compensation for her time in a relaxed environment, no house fees or staff tips to cut into her earnings, etc. 3. Be upfront about what level of service you want, but tell her she can define those limits. You will have to be prepared to know if her limits are going to be OK with you or not, and how to approach the issue of adjusting compensation accordingly. 4. As has been said, make sure you both understand expectations. 5. Make it clear that she won't lose you as a customer if she says no, unless that's a true statement. These women are master bullshitters and manipulators so they will already have decided if you are the same. 6. Don't be a pest about the idea. Bring it up once, and if she's interested she will let you know. She may not want to say no outright, but don't assume she didn't hear you and keep bringing it up. 7. You will both have more fun if you both feel good about the transaction and feel completely safe and comfortable. And of course.... YMMV!
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