Lamest lines said to strippers

I thought it'd be fun to hear some of the lame lines we say or hear other PL's say to strippers.
I'll start with a fairly lame line I sometimes use though, believe it or not, it actually works sometimes.
Sometimes, during a pretty intimate vip where the dancer seems to be into it and is grinding on my usually covered unit I'll say, with some urgency in my voice, "would you just put the tip in?"
I know, I know, that's pretty lame. But it's surprising how often it works! A lot of dancers (who aren't jaded yet) really want to please and will often do what you ask if they like you (or want a tip). They can still say to themselves that we didn't really do it because she only put the tip in.
Other times, the dancer is really enjoying the dance as well and once the tip is inserted you might as well go all the way.
Either way is a win for me!
Comments
last commentWent to an (evidently) corny club in Milwaukee where, while on their "tip walk", the gals say things like "Stick it in there!" and "Stick it in me!" [Both gals presented their cleavage as the opportunity to make said deposits, fyi.]
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"Hey baby just because I am out of cash does not mean I don't have a credit card to use on you"
Yes I am a PL sometimes lol
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Bendover, are girls taking your 'tip' or the whole thing doing so without a condom, my impression is that they are?
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Hard to pick, since my whole strip club shtick is basically lame, but here are some samples:
Me: (fumbling with a dollar garter tip) I can’t get it in.
Her: (laughing) I haven’t heard that in awhile.
Me: You busy?
Her: I promised someone a dance next.
Me: Well, could you put me on your “to do†list?
Her: (Laughing) OK, I’ll come back to “do you.â€
Me: (to dancer on stage) Are you tied up after this?
Her: No, why?
Me: Would you like to be tied up?
Her: Oh...
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"What's a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?"
(When she starts playing with her pussy on stage)
"Did you bring enough to share with everyone in the class?"
Her: "So, do you come here often?"
Me: "Once in a while, what about you?"
Her: "I work here; I'm here all the time."
Me: "Oh. That meaning of 'come'."
Her: "You can touch me anywhere you want."
Me: "OK, I want to touch inside you."
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I like every bone in your body especially mine
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Actually, some of those are funny enough--if the mood is right--she might get a chuckle from them, rather than be annoyed.
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Me: I wouldn't last 5 minutes in bed with you.
Her: It could happen...For $500.
If I ever get her down to $300, it will be a done deal.
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Now, mind you I've never said these things in real life, but my inner 13 year old has.
"Honey, there's something I'd like to get straight between you and me."
"You polished that pole up real good. Can mine be next?"
"Fuck me. Oh, sorry, did I just say that?"
"Hey baby, what's the significance of that swastika tattoo just above your ass crack?"
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Lame lines I'm too scared to use:
Dancer: What do you do?
Me: I'm a priest on vacation.
Dancer: What are you doing here?
Me: Learning about life's pleasures. Will you teach me some?
Me: I want to have a sex change operation so I can be as beautiful as you are.
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I know you don't have a penis but I bet you have a great place to put one. I haven't siad that but I did get an asian stripper to say "Me so horny,me love you long time" She got a kick out of it.
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@ gatorfan...lol..so funny. Reminds me of Phil Lynott (Thin Lizzy) on Live and Dangerous album, asks the girls in the audience if they have any Irish in them, then asks them if the want any more.
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She: I'd love to dance for you.
Me: Are you good?
She: Yes
Me: Sorry I'm looking for someone bad.
She (usually): I mean I'm good at being bad.
Me (usually): Show me
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Her: Hey Phil, how are you doing?
Me: A helluva lot better now you're here
Her: I haven't seen you in a while, where've you been?
Me: Looking for you, glad I found ya.
Or: Lost and I'm glad you found me.
Her: You getting dances today?
Me: Yeah, who do you suggest?
Me: how many did we do?
Her: 4 songs
Me: Can you loan me $50?
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Some very good lame lines! I may steal the line about looking for someone bad.
I also like the one about loaning me money to pay for your dance.
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Haha, Phil's last three were great
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Phil, I've got to hit 8 Mile and use those lines before that get old.
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[quote]Her: "So, do you come here often?"
Me: "Once in a while, what about you?"
Her: "I work here; I'm here all the time."
Me: "Oh. That meaning of 'come'."[quote]
George, I'm going to steal this one. I get asked that all the time.
Probably the lamest one I use is a question. "Hey, so what do you do when you're not here turning every guy on in the place". It may be lame, but for some reason it always releases any tension and gets a chuckle. Great way to break the ice.
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lol
good stuff!
I'm gonna use Philip's "loan" line tomorrow night.
Ten to one odds the dancer will stare at me, confused, for a solid 3 minutes.
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Ok, I've copyrighted those lines. You guys and Lopaw owe me $1 each time you use them.
© $ © $ © $ © $ © $ ©
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Her (as she is putting her boobs in my face): How are you doing this evening?
Me: Well, I've got boobs in my face, so I am doing pretty damn good.
Her (Still with boobs in my face): Ha ha, well you're going to be feeling pretty good all night.
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