What Makes a Good Strip Club Review?

17 comments

• wallanon

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  7 years ago

  If the details are accurate from the reviewer's point of view, that is good enough for me. Especially if it is a well reviewed club, I don't need every review to run down a list of specifics. It's not a problem if they're included, I can just skim over the stuff I'm not looking for.
• rh48hr

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  7 years ago

  I try to take the reader through my experience for the trip. within this experience I attempt to give details which give the reader a good picture of what is available in terms of talent for that trip and any other interesting news, notes and nuggets of information which can help a PL to make a decision. If it is my first trip to a club, I will give a description of the club because it is my first time. After that I will only give updates on club details when there is something new. Writing a detailed review takes time. I appreciate those who take the time to give me Intel I can use. I try to do the same.
• Papi_Chulo

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  6 years ago

  IMO a review is about providing info for *others* - many reviewers just wanna tell you things from their POV like what a great time they had and leave out everything else. I try to describe details about the club from when one enters the club - i.e.: + parking situation (free; paid; hard to park; easy to park; etc) + cover-charge (often times the info on the club's page can be missing, incorrect, or not described in full) + dance price - again can be incorrect on the club's page; or incomplete (different dayshift price vs nigthshift price)- also try to mention dance-specials + drink prices - I'm not much of a drinker but at least specify what I paid for what I drank + # of dancers - often difficult if not impossible to have an absolutely precise # - but I will at least state whether it was a good # of dancers for the size crowd/club, or if it was a sausage fest + I try to rate the dancers from the POV of how the avg SCer might see them not necessarily what they do for me looks-wise - and also describe how they look in terms of type (e.g. almost all skinny girls; or good balance of thick and skinny girls; or plastic parts all over the place) - also describe ethnicity (good mix; all white-chicks) etc + describe mileage overall - e.g. most girls give good-mileage; or it's a LM club - or it's hit or miss depending on the dancer + also try to list the VIP prices as best I know them (since I don't do VIP in most of my visits) + whether girls circulate or you gotta have a cardboard sign saying "will pay for dances"
• theDirkDiggler

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  6 years ago

  ^ You probably won't like my reviews. Every club i review for the first time, i usually try to describe as if someone has never been there. So usually a paragraph or two just on the setup, atmosphere, overall quality of the place, parking/valet details, seating arrangements, cost of entry, drink requirements, bathroom situation including trolls, or generic club info, except very specific for that particular club. I try to reflect this in the Vibe/Value/Vampiness ratings as well. Basically, i try to walk a reader on what he would expect in a typical or not so typical visit to that club with as few surprises as possible. Then i go into the lineup that worked that night by name along with personal ratings and description unless there are too many girls in which case i'll give more of a summary. I'll describe the stage and what usually goes on there as that is a considerable interest for many clubgoers and PLs whether for whetting one's appetite or if that's the main reason for going. Then i''ll describe what private dances and VIPs entail and how much they are and what you might expect to go on. All this is hard to do in a short review. To get into advanced strategies/tricks/tactics for a particular club would just add to an already long review. Maybe my first review (the shortest) was probably the most efficient, but it was also just one long paragraph and hard to read. I've since been much more detailed. Finally, i'll conclude with my personal assessment of the club and if i felt it was worth visiting. I won't however, go into specific dancers unless they were ROBs, but i've been pretty good at avoiding them lately. Lot of your questions are more related to variables outside your control (varying dancers and customers at a particular time) than really club dependent. Like taking a dancer away from a regular? That's a can of worms that i'd rather not open in a review as that depends heavily on the dancer and PL, probably more the PL. I don't cater my review to a particular type of PL or a specific customer and what he may want and just provide a general expectation of the place. In the end YMMV or will vary, so don't take my word for it and you have decide if you want to try it for yourself and come to your own conclusions. All that other stuff? Probably better answered in discussions or PMs or review props.
• Papi_Chulo

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  6 years ago

  The TUSCL review guidelines suggest one include the club layout and it's kinda the first thing mentioned in the guidelines, thus why many reviewers probably state that upfront.
• Papi_Chulo

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  6 years ago

  The reviews I tend to avoid are the ones that start with "I went with my girlfriend/wife" - the couples' experience is often very different that the lone-guy's experience in terms of what they are looking for and how they get treated
• Warrior15

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  6 years ago

  Papi, I didn't know there were guidelines. Where are those ?
• Papi_Chulo

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  6 years ago

  ^ in a club's TUSCL page, when one presses the "write a review" link, there appears some general text w.r.t. writing reviews plus a "Read our review guidelines" link in blue text
• Warrior15

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  6 years ago

  Had not seen that before. Here that is : Your review will be sent to our editors for approval, so it is suggested that you read our review guidelines. Content and length are the two most important factors to consider. Be wordy. Fill the review box. One or two sentence reviews aren't helpful to anyone. Give a LOT of details in your review (club layout, atmosphere, dance quality, etc.). Your review should be at least 4 solid paragraphs, with 4-7 sentences each. One paragraph should describe the club vibe. Mention cleanliness, thug factor, music level, dj annoyance factor, lighting, etc. Another paragraph should describe the dancers and their vampiness. How many were there? What ethicities did you see? Did they seem happy to see you? A third paragraph should be about value. Don't say drinks, dances, cover charge, etc. were cheap or expensive. Tell us the actual costs! At least one paragraph should summarize with three or four sentences describing why you would or would not return to the club. Be honest. You can go into detail of the private dances. Just be careful with names if it may get your ATF in trouble. Spelling, grammar, and punctuation count. Do not use ALL CAPITAL LETTERS! When composing a review, spell check it. Pro Tip 1: Think about what you would like to tell your good buddy about a strip club he's never been to. Pro Tip 2: Think about the business traveler that is sitting in his hotel room with only time enough to hit one club in this new town. Let him know why or why not he should visit a particular club. We have a zero tolerance policy for plagiarism. If we find out you submit a review as your own from another site, your account will be deleted.
• anonlvone

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  6 years ago

  @ warrior15 - regarding #3, to some extent prices are relative. ymmv applies here as well. i lived in vegas, i never cared what tourists paid, as a regular my expectations and experiences were different than the once a year weekend visitors, but even outside of vegas, don't be surprised if different girls have different price points for different customers. in general the key is to be as pleasant to deal with as possible. if you have poor hygiene, poor manners, or just have an unpleasant personality, don't be surprised if dancers charge you more, sort of like a "nuisance fee" @taxi driver - some clubs are rather large, and/or rather dark, the club descriptions aren't to sell you on the club, they're to help orient first time visitors. i appreciate knowing where the men's room is w/o having to ask. if there's multiple VIP areas and multiple dance options I appreciate knowing that too. sometimes certain club areas will be closed off during a particular visit, so again, I appreciate having a head's up that there's more to the club than you might first think
• goosman

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  6 years ago

  I try to write the review that I would want to read, when evaluating if I should check out a club. I also try to confirm or dispell things I've read in prior reviews. If I've never reviewed a club before I do write about club details for a couple of different reasons: 1. to give the PL a little bit of orientation so that the club isn't a total surpise to figure out when they enter; 2. Details about logistics like where are good seats in the club, where are bad seats - for example in a place like Diamond Dolls where you sit on a busy night can effect your experience. Even though I like visiting new clubs, I don't like that period of figuring out how everything works, when you visit a new club. I try to get the PL as situated as he can be to get the most out of his visit. Also If I don't like a club, I always try to say why. What I didn't like, some others may like.
• laplurker

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  6 years ago

  Here is what I want from a review: 1. What do the dancers look like? The 1 to 10 scale is OK. 2. What are the dance options (table, lap, VIP, etc.) and what do they cost? 3. Are extras available and, if so, at what cost? 4. Anything else that effects the club experience: relentless drink push, too loud music, annoying DJ, etc.
• Jascoi

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  6 years ago

  before i write my next review i need to review this article and comments. good tips here.
• MackTruck

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  6 years ago

  I agree with cflock
• bubbletop

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  6 years ago

  I use the reviews to look for clubs that are easy to get to (if you are going to a town you have never been), their parking lot is well lit (at night) and has security. I also use the reviews for the drink, lap dance and vip prices. Helps to know which girls to seek out and which ones to avoid.
• towntap

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  5 years ago

  Great info. One thing I look for is possible recommendations on best place to sit. Some corners are better, others have great booths etc. I know this is only for that small % of clubs. But it is useful when it applies.
• san_jose_guy

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  5 years ago

  Got to talk about front room friendliness, how far does it go, how does it work. Should be favoring clubs where front room makeout sessions are common. SJG Trump has capitulated to Pelosi Trump to Delay State of the Union Address Until Shutdown Ends [view link]