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Dr.F

This is the third and likely final installment of my Tijuana adventures -- the writing of it I mean, not the doing of it! I returned to the Zona Norte last weekend and, as usual, am happy to report my experiences. This time, I drove my car from Arizona, parked on the American side of the border and then walked across into TJ with an overnight duffel bag. I arrived at about 3:30pm on a Saturday afternoon and checked into Las Cascadas Hotel, which is directly above the Hong Kong Club. They've recently raised their prices, so the cost was $110 total for the Sat / Sun nights, which is pricey for the Zona, but still very convenient for pounding bar girls (BGs) and street girls (SGs). I got a renovated room on the top floor (6th) and it was fine. The bedding was still so-so, and the towels pretty shitty, but decent overall. I brought a hair dryer and my own pillow, which I learned from last time.

Compared to last time, there was a little less action going on -- not all the chicas had returned from their homes due to the holidays, but still some decent talent lurking. I walked around the block and saw some surprisingly cute SGs, but no Claudia unfortunately -- she hadn't returned from her home town I guess. Bummer because I was planning on sampling her this time... So once I acclimatized to the debauched Zona, I hit the HK club to see what the daytime action was like. Overall, it was about 85% of previous times in terms of quantity, but the quality seemed up to par more or less. I grabbed a little booth at the back of the bar while the dyke shaving cream show was wrapping up and used my coupon to get 2-for-1 clamato juices. About 5 minutes later, Angel plops on my lap and rubs her exposed C-cups in my face. Sh's a short, thin brunette, nice little ass, enhanced tits, relatively cute face and a bit of a hustler -- she was constantly cruising for $1 tips by letting guys suck on her tits. Overall, 8.5 body, 7 or maybe 7.5 face. I decided on a ficha drink ($8) and some snogging to get warmed up. Very little English, so we talked in Spanish:

Me: Your name is Angel, but you act like a little devil. Ironic, no?
Her: I'm a good girl / bad girl depending on my mood, I guess (winking).
Me: Show me your bad girl with a kiss, and maybe I'll treat you like a novia (girlfriend) later.
Her: (Gives me a tepid kiss w/ a tiny bit of tongue).
Me: What? I thought Latinas had more passion than that. You're no different than a normal American girl. I'm disappointed.
Her: Of course I have more passion, but... Oh her's my friend Sarah, can she join us?

I let Sarah join us, knowing that this is a common ploy by chica pals in the HK Club -- they want to sometimes tag team you for ficha drinks. I allowed it because I wanted to use Sarah to get more mileage from Angel and strike a good bargain for going arriba (upstairs to shag). Sarah had a pretty face, medium length fake blonde hair and a nice smile / attitude, but a little heavier than what I like and only a few words of English. Once I turned my attention to Sarah and started flirting, including talking about shaving and maintaining my cock / balls, Angel got with the program real quick. Deep French kissing (DFK), straddling me and agreed to $70 for a full hour once she realized I already had a room at Cascadas. Pretty good deal that, but I wanted to watch the last half of the Pats / Colts game in peace, so I excused myself (amid much protesting from the chicas) and headed back up to my room to catch it, albeit in Spanish of course! Had some snacks, washed up and hoped that I would see my favorite gal from last time, Desiree (aka Kiera now? but real name Judith), as it was after 8pm by now -- which is when most nighttime chicas start their shift. My plan at that point was Desiree as the lead-off hitter, then maybe Angel on deck. Seemed like a good batting order, but...

Well, to my great disappointment, Desiree was not back from holidays either, so I tracked down Angel and called her over while I was standing at the back bar.

Me: Hey. Making good money tonight Angel?
Her: No, not much. Why did you walk past me before?
Me: Oh, well you were with some gringo / client, so I let you do you work. Did he tip you?
Her: Well, I thought we were going arriba, but maybe you don't think I'm attractive enough (frowning). What's going on?
Me: What? No, you're cute and I like you, but you'll have to be a little more cochina w/ me upstairs (smiling and winking).

Apparently that was the wrong thing to say and she misinterpreted it. Cochina means pig, but under the context I meant it to mean "dirty" or "slutty" in a sexy way, but Angel was not impressed, turned on her heel, and inexplicitly walked into the bathroom not to be seen again. I was stunned that I may have actually offended this mid-level bar whore -- WTF? So, I walked back to my favorite booth, ordered another 2-for-1 beverage from a different mesero and pondered my new strategy. Before I could even pour my drink from the can, Brazil sits down beside me and wins me over with her big smile and exposed tits. In Spanish:

Me: Hey, I like your shirt, what's your name? (she was wearing a tiny Superman half-tee that had her large C or D cups fully exposed -- nice nipples).
Her. I'm Brazil. Wow, you're good looking, I want to spend some time with you!
Me: Oh, thanks for the nice words, why the name Brazil?
Her: I love the Brazil soccer team and normally wear the national team shirt, but a very small one of course, so everyone here started to call me Brazil.
Me: Really?! I thought you'd like the Mexican team better. What's the word for... oh yeah, traitor!
Her: Hey, have you seen the teams play? There is really no comparison, is there? Brazil is the best, but Mexico is close to my heart also. Now forget about the beer and let's get some tequila (squealing w/ laughter)!

Brazil is definitely a party girl and I had seen her before. It seemed like she knew every waiter and many gringos, so she was a definitely a vet of the HK scene -- she admitted to working there at least 2 years. She also said she was 30 years old and had 3 kids, and you could definitely tell that she was mature and lived the life, but she still had a real decent body and her party / excited attitude was really infectious. She had a reasonably attractive face, but hardened and too made up for me, so I bought her a ficha and then made an excuse to meet a friend. She was fairly gracious about the rejection and we parted with a nice kiss.

Well, I didn't leave HK, I merely moved to the front of the bar, which is enough to escape most chicas because they often have their very defined "territories" within the club. I was actually standing by the stairs leading up to the lap dance closets when a sexy dark Latina in a tight black dress (conservative by HK standard's) winked at me and approached. She talked in Spanglish:

Her: Hi baby, do you want to get a table and talk?
Me: I like your sexy accent baby, what's your name?
Her: I'm (she says something like "Areenia" but her real name is Lourdes and her friends call her Lulu), come with me this way please (she leads me to my favorite sofa in the downstairs VIP lounge!).
Me: Oh, I like this sofa -- good memories for me last time (thinking of snogging my little Desiree...). You're classy looking Lourdes, are you a good girl also?
Her: Yes of course. For me, no smoking, drugs or tattoos. I'm 23 and don't have children because I'm studying to become a doctor's assistant. You can call me Lulu if you like, but don't tell anyone else here.
Me: Wow, great to hear, I like your ambition Lulu! Well, let's develop some chemistry (as I pull her closer to me and lightly kiss her cheek). Do you like to travel? Where have you been in the world?
Her: Well, nowhere really, but I would love to go to Las Vegas some day. Actually, my paperwork with the government should be complete in a few days and that's the first place I would like to go when I get my visa.
Me: I'm actually going to Vegas at the end of April with friends from Canada. It's a yearly thing w've been doing for many years, so I'm kind of getting tired of it to be honest.
Her: Oh really, well maybe you could take me and it would be more interesting for you (really excited looking)!!!
Me: Well, don't joke, because that sounds very good to me (my mind kicks into high gear as I ponder if the logistics are possible and what sort of epic impact it would have on my buddies if I showed up w/ this chica out of the blue!).
Her: No, I'm serious. You seem different from other gringos; you haven't even tried to grab my tits or be a pig and you're not drinking beer, so maybe you are someone to like and trust. I like you are from Canada because I had an excellent Canadian friend once.
Me: Well Lulu, I would love to take you to Vegas, but I drive very fast and like playing music from the '70 and '80s; are you OK with that (winking and smiling)?
Her: (in all seriousness) The music is no problem, but you shouldn't drive fast because you are still young with lots of life. Don't risk it, my friend. Let's go together, but slowly and safely.


We talked for at least 20 more minutes and developed excellent chemistry. We snuggled and kissed and I brought up going arriba, and she readily agreed to $70 for 45 minutes -- I didn't grind her on pricing too much because of this potential Las Vegas situation. I had a hard on right there in anticipation. As I glanced across the VIP lounge, I notice the infamous original Lulu w/ the World's Best Ass & Body staring at me as she was grinding some chubby Asian dude on the other sofa -- naturally she had a completely disinterested look on her face. I winked and nodded to her and thought about that strange experience I had with her a few months prior (see my previous article). She was looking very fine though: her honey blonde hair was cut a little shorter into a shoulder length bob and she was in a little bikini showing off her money makers. I was glad to be w/ sexy Lourdes and kind of rubbing it in -- sort of like, "I'm snogging someone way hotter than you are grinding" type of thing. Of course Lourdes noticed the tension, so I mentioned that her name was Lulu also and told her of my strange / poor experience. Lourdes couldn't believe it and said it was a bitchy thing to do. Well, I was almost done my clamato juice, so I told Lourdes to wait for just a few more minutes and w'll go up to the hotel, but I wanted to request a song first -- you guessed it, Robin Thick's "Blurred Lines" which has become my anthem at HK! So the mesero runs over and I give him $1 to go to the DJ for a song, but he says it's $5 now -- WTF? Not to look like a cheap chump, I pull out the $5 and send him on his way. Lourdes then says she needs to go to the bathroom and will be right back. Then everything mysteriously goes completely fucking sideways...

Just as the song comes on, Lourdes walks back into the VIP lounge, holds up her index finger to me (as in "just a second"), and then takes a detour to talk w/ a mesero. They talk for a minute, then I see her walk out into the main bar. 5 minutes pass, the song's long over and my boner is long gone, so I finally get up to see what's going on. I walk out and see Lourdes w/ some gringos in a booth and sh's on a guy's lap acting sexy -- WTF? Essentially this Lourdes (the new Lulu) pulls the same shit on me that the original Lulu did, despite me just relating the fucking story to her. I was seriously flabbergasted at the turn of events. I walked over to her, bit my tongue, and gave her a quizzical but harsh look for a couple of seconds, she looked like she was too embarrassed to hold my gaze, so I just walked out of the bar in a completely sober stupor. What the fuck just happened? Did Lourdes and Lulu meet in the bathroom and talk some shit about me? Did Lourdes get offended somehow, by my slight hesitation and wanting to finish my drink and request some music? Complete mystery that I will get to the bottom of my next trip, I guarantee you that, gentle reader. And then maybe a revenge pounding will be on the menu -- we shall see.

Anyways, I stumbled into Adelita's Bar next door and stand by the sunken bar area trying to make sense of the night and take stock. I look up a see a hot little spinner walking towards me (calls herself something like "Nevenia") and think I've wasted enough time so I grab her arm and introduce myself w/ a double kiss on the cheeks. Sh's very receptive so we grab a ficha and sh's all over me until a waiter comes by and says something to her and she gets up -- and I'm like No Fucking Way at this point -- but it's her turn to dance on stage. So I watch this girl perform (I nicknamed her Niv) and sh's really sexy and confident and garnering lots of attention from all the surrounding sausage in the bar. But true to her word, she comes back to me and I realize I've lost all my bargaining power w/ her because I see a small flock of mongers starting to come towards us like horny zombies. So I simply ask how much, she says $60 plus hotel, I agree and we walk past all the grumbling and salivating losers towards the hotel entrance.

Niv was actually my type physically: short and petite, but athletic body, enhanced C-cups, long dark straight hair and a cute face w/ pretty eyes. Said she was from Mexico City, had 1 kid, 26 years old (?) and had a sister working in the bar too. Overall, 9 body, 8 face and all business, but she had a sexy enough vibe to be alluring. I had to pay for the hotel ($13) because Adelita girls can't go to the Cascadas Hotel -- oh well. Niv grabs what looks like a doctor's bag from the front desk and I soon realize it's filled w/ condoms, creams, lubricants etc -- pretty handy. We get to the room and I plead with my cock-o-saurus not to play any fucking games with me. It had been a strange night and I obviously didn't want it ending badly (limply) with this experienced spinner who was DTF. Despite the strange environment, time constraints, and Niv taking her time washing up and selecting the right rubber, my cock behaved impeccably and agreed to be patient. I laid on my back on the bed virtually nude (kept the black socks on!) and waited for this very fit chica to ride the bull. Well, the bang was pretty good. Niv allowed some DATY, the magic thumb ride, light French kissing and some vigorous doggy style to completion. Good sound effects too and she cleaned me up like the pro she is. Not sure if I would repeat, but I finally got my Saturday night nut and pushed back against the scornful TJ gods who were foiling me all night. As an aside, being a neck specialist and hearing Niv had neck pain / headaches lingering from a car accident, I gave her a good neck treatment as a tip and she seemed really thankful -- w'll see how she responds to me next time I see her. If I get a great reception, I'd give her another go.

Sunday

I finally found Nikki's (a relatively new bar / restaurant / hotel that's less than a 5 minute walk from HK and very popular w/ mongers) and ended up having breakfast and lunch there and watching the football games. Met some good people, scored some good intel / info on various chicas, and then left for HK before it got too late. Back at HK, I hunted down Lourdes w/ no luck unfortunately, but eventually bumped into little Angel, so I motioned her over to my booth.

Me: Angel, what's going on little girl?
Her: Oh hi, can you buy me a drink and I'll sit w/ you?
Me: 1 drink, yes, but you better be friendlier tonight. I thought we were going arriba, but maybe you misunderstood me and got confused.
Her: Well, you didn't act like it, so I was confused.
Me: I don't like complications, so let's be clear. After your drink, w'll go upstairs for 1 hour and I'll pay you $70 like we agreed on last night. You can show me more than just your tits (smiling).
Her: Oh... I'm really tired now, not a lot of energy, so let's just sit here and have some drinks for now (and then she starts singing very poorly to a song that comes on in the background while putting my hands on her tits).
Me: (in English) You've got to be fucking kidding me! (in Spanish as I withdraw my hands from her tits) I don't like your games Angel, so I'll look for another girl (I turn my head and look toward the stage). Lots of hot chicas here tonight who need money.
Her: Oh... well, how about $60 for 30 minutes? I think you'll like my special slow blowjob...
Me: (cutting her off and completely out of patience) I'm sure you won't have enough energy to interest my penis, so finish your beer and go use your tits to collect $1 tips from drunks.

Angel walks off a little stunned and I see Brazil coming towards me so I jump up and head to the front of the bar again. I sit in a booth and strike up a conversation w/ a drunk American guy from St. Louis. H's in his mid-to-late 20s and wants to talk hockey because I tell him I'm Canadian. As I'm distracted by this, a sneaky mesero escorts 2 fake blondes (sisters as it turns out) to my booth before I could protest and am greeted w/ puppy dog eyes from all of them, so I cave and buy 2 fichas. These girls are cute and speak some English and it turns out they have relatives in the same Mexican beach town that I maintain a house. Nice coincidence and I try to take advantage of it by suggesting they should come to the town for their holidays when it gets warmer and stay w/ me. They are very intrigued by the idea and we develop good chemistry. I focus in on the sister sitting next to me and scrutinize her (she called herself Alondra or Alehandra or something similar): real cute face, long fake blonde hair but done nicely with various braids, enhanced C-cups, a pierced tongue and braces. She has a big crappy tattoo on her mid and lower back of some sort of tree / vine, but she tells me it's to cover a burn that she got when she was a kid. Sh's also burned on her left elbow area. She also has a couple of kids. Well, certainly more negatives than positives at this point, but I can't see her ass and legs because sh's sitting, so I continue on with the bantering. Her pretty face and sexy personality keep her in the game. Then I notice that my new American buddy is calling a chica over for a drink -- and guess who it is? The original Lulu, looking as good as I've ever seen her. Fuck! The torment continues...

Lulu slips into the dud's booth while giving me a cheeky little smile. I respond by telling Alehandra to give me her most passionate kiss if she wants to go arriba. My chica performs very, very well and I'm surprised that I don't really notice her braces or piercing while I'm trying to choke her with my tongue. By this time the sister takes the hint and excuses herself and I agree to $70 for 45 minutes for an aggressive pounding upstairs. We get up to go and the drunken dude hi-5s me while Lulu and I shoot laser beams through our eyes at each other. If I could have fucked my chica on dud's table right in front of Lulu I would have, but I suppose I don't need that kind of notoriety!

Well, once in my room and the chica is completely nude, I see that I could have done much better on HK's physical scale. She also had some baby damage on the front, hail damage on her ass and was probably 10 pounds heavier in the caboose than she should have been, given her profession. In civilian life, I've never banged a girl of this lower quality to be honest (body was about a 6.5, despite her big tits), but here in TJ I'm paying for it? What am I thinking? Clearly Lulu was driving me nuts and destroying my judgment! Well, we have a little rumble on the bed, then out comes the condom and my wood starts to abate before I can penetrate her. Fuck, I should've popped a Viagra or something, but too late and I go through a few minutes of shame as she tries her best with her mouth -- sh's even sucking my shaved balls! Well, I pull myself together and think what this chick can really offer me. I decide to go back to the French kissing, and this chica is passionate and eager. She tastes really good, like cinnamon actually, so I nickname her Canella from that point on. Was her taste from a flavored condom? Who the fuck knows, but I wasn't expecting it to be so pleasant. The making out restores the wood, but I decide to push it and go for some DATY (bird licking) in efforts to make myself hard as steel. Risky business that, because a foul pussy is obviously a boner destroyer, but thank god she was clean and healthy. Great looking labia; pink as cotton candy. In fact, her pussy tasted just as good as her mouth and I got into it for about 10 minutes. Now we were both in a lather of hormones and she turned herself around and guided me in doggy style. I remember thinking, Jesus this girl is showing me some pretty potent penis kryptonite (chunky, hail damaged ass, and a brutal half-finished tattoo that covered most of her burned back), but I'll be damned if some great DFK and DATY didn't turn me into Lex Luther as I pounded relentlessly for 15 minutes before I nutted. And it was a good nut w/ enough leche to impress her. She then cleaned me up, I gave her a little gift of chocolate and she reminded me to come back soon and talk more about meeting up in my beach town sometime in the Spring. Fair enough, I say, and Lulu the Bitch be damned!

I decided not to head out to the clubs or street again -- no need to really after such a powerful nut. I got a good sleep this time and didn't make it to the border until about 9am, but I only waited about 15 minutes to cross. Another great experience in TJ even w/out my favorites being there (Desiree and Claudia), but I have to admit, next time back I'll be taking down the original Lulu in some capacity, for better or for worse. Stay tuned. Final costs:

$20 for overnight parking on the U.S. side
$10 for taxi rides
$110 for hotel room (2 nights)
$20 on discounted drinks for me (including tips)
$90 for ficha drinks (including tips)
$153 for 2 decent shags
$16 for a sit-down breakfast and lunch
$5 for three hotdogs
For a total of $424. A little over budget -- I've got to learn to cut back on those fichas!


As an aside, I made a couple of funny animations regarding mongering in Tijuana, called Claudia the Street Girl and Princessa the Bar Girl. Check them out and enjoy (no, they're not autobiographical!):

http://goanimate.com/videos/0llrDxDpIUNA

http://goanimate.com/videos/0PCKLFtH1gPo