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I've been hitting the titty bars around Portland for many years and since the recession hit and has not run, I am finding these are some of the best times for the customer to invest in stripper affection.

First, the rules have changed a lot in Oregon. There used to be a three foot rule: dancers could not get closer than within three feet of the customer which meant absolutely no touching existed. In the old days if you tried to touch a stripper they would either warn you immediately or the bouncer was tossing you before you knew what hit you. Not any more! Friction lap dances are the norm and strippers are negociating with their customers like never before.

Also, I like hitting clubs on slow, weeknights after 11PM. A lot of the hipster punks hanging around are swilling cheap cans of PBR and not tipping. Tipping two bucks a song is usually enough to get a stripper's attention and you should be prepared to buy your favorite one a drink. A lot of the girls on these shifts haven't made a buck on a lap dance and are very willing to give you a late night special (I've had some give me up to five private dances for only $60). Two for one dances are not uncommon.

On occasion you will find a hot stripper that's really drunk. These girls can offer up some pretty dirty private dances and some have even forgotten to collect from me! Watch the girls who move off the stage during their set and give the guys a mini friction dance - they are typically the more raunchy girls who provide a dirtier private show. In some of my regular clubs, the dancers will say "hi" to you on the floor and give your crotch a quick flicker with their fingers. Stick with her. These are the dancers who will grind your pants off in the back room, let you suck on their titties, and finger their asses (and sometimes pussies). If you blow your load, don't hide it. Most of these dirty dancers get turned on knowing you've just dumped a load in your jeans. There's a good chance also this type of dancer is looking to book even more sexy entertainment in a private place away from the club.

Take advantage of this recession - there are more negotiable, dirty dancers working it than ever before.