More Rules from 5 Pros and one Neophyte

avatar for Rlionheart
Rlionheart
<p>
Let&#39;s start by my admitting that I am the Neophyte and that any wisdom laid down here is the product of the pros who have spent much time and money in strip clubs. And, yes, there are some of you out there who are questioning the intelligence of people who spend lots of time and money in such places. I learned that you should take good advice where you find it and that if you listen carefully you hear profound stuff in the least likely of places.<br />
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I was reminded of these rules as I was reading &quot;Rules for Lending Money to a Stripper&quot;. Great Stuff and Kudos to &quot;wasted&quot; for a great article<br />
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With all that out of the way:<br />
<br />
Rule<br />
<br />
1) Never lend money to a stripper<br />
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2) Always follow rule #1<br />
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3) If you want to stop somewhere to have more than one or two drinks, go to a regular bar. If you want to see and talk to pretty women, go to a strip club. Don&#39;t try to do both at the stripclub - you will not enjoy it and may run into some trouble.<br />
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4) Always tip the bartender 20% minimum. If you like the place and will be back, slip the DJ a five and find the regular manager for the shift you will be using and give him/her a compliment on the place or the operation.<br />
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5) The dancers are there to make money and not there because they are looking for a big manly handsome and attractive guy like you. Seriously, all of us male-types would like to be irresistable to women but we&#39;re (usually) not. And if you are Casanova,I apologize. That said, don&#39;t get carried away with your expectations (see rule 6)<br />
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6) If nothing else remember that God gave Man 2 heads but only enough blood to run one at a time. As your thinking center shuts down and &quot;Big Ed&quot; starts to take over remember there are limits to the club rules, limits on what the dancer will provide, limits to the amount of cash you can sink into this (and God Help You if you even think about using the ATM that is there. First, you&#39;ll blow the rent money and second, have you checked the fees on those things??? We used to refer to that as vigorish back East.) Best to define your limits before you go into the club like &bull; limit of two drinks &bull; limit of &quot;x&quot; number of dollars that you can reasonably spend and leave the ATM card and surplus cash at home.<br />
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7) Finally always treat the dancers like a couteous gentleman should. Buy them a (way overpriced) drink if they want one, talk to them for a while (not too long), hold their chair for them. Remember they are there to make money. If you try to talk for hours, you are reducing the amount of money they will have at the end of the month. If you came unprepared (no $$$$) let them know that and make it easier for them to switch off and go find someone who can pay. Ask them what shift they work and tell them you&#39;ll come back ready to go next time with both pockets bulging (then add that you carry your money in your right pocket). And if you overheard that they like something and it isn&#39;t expensive, get it and bring it to the club the next time. I did that a few years back and the return on investment was absolutely amazing. Following rule # 7 will clearly set you apart from the bozos who are telling fart jokes while squeezing anything that gets within 3 feet of them. There is nothing that is more of a turnoff for women than to be treated like a cantelope.<br />
<br />
These rules have helped me enjoy every trip I make to the clubs and I hope they will be useful to you.</p>

12 comments

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avatar for rell
rell
13 years ago
good atricle i was going to write a article that touched alot of the points you did but decided to go in a different route.. good read though
avatar for newmark
newmark
13 years ago
Good stuff there. I never heard vig used outside a casino.
avatar for Stiletto25
Stiletto25
13 years ago
I like rule #7
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
13 years ago
"Finally always treat the dancers like a couteous gentleman should."

I've always done that & more often than not has gotten me exactly what I wanted.
avatar for Rod8432
Rod8432
13 years ago
Thanks for the tip about and inexpensive gift in Rule #7. I know a guy who when visiting SCs in Europe will bring along American candy not generally available there to give to the girls. They flip over it and I think the good karma he gets translates into better mileage later. So your idea is a thoughtful touch that I'll keep in mind.
avatar for gsv
gsv
13 years ago
#7 - couldn't have said it better myself. Everything you said there pays dividends in having the dancers like you more, and often gets you better mileage.
avatar for JohnBuford
JohnBuford
13 years ago
I am a sales rep for a book company and when I stop in a club it it almost always when I'm in the area on business.So many of these girls are single parents and love to talk about their kids.I find out their ages and whether b/g and what they like etc.I excuse myself ,go to my car and bring in samples for them to keep and bring home to their kids. I get a LOT of mileage out of that.A thoughtful gift works wonders.
avatar for davephx
davephx
13 years ago
At the risk of being ridiculed for my lack of typical interests, I have 20+ years experiences at zillions of strip clubs and have never tipped any door guy or dancer (This American tipping thing to me is just silly). yet I have been very popular at many clubs.

Assuming you haven't already seen my websites and zillions of reviews on other forums especially from Canada huge clubs (sexworkcanada.com for my various old reports and maybe some here) let me first share one experience a few years ago in Phoenix.

In those days you paid like $25 for 3 dancers and the dancers wanted tips besides. Today its typically $10/dance or $20 in VIP etc in Phoenix.

At one club where I was popular the hostess was amazed that I was so popular even although I never tipped.

One night she had enough - she had to make a waiting list for dancers that wanted to dance with me! She had another dancer hostess for her and almost demanded to dance for me. Talk about pressure on me, here is a gal determined to find out why I'm popular but I have no idea if she is the type that likes what I do etc.

Well every since she was my biggest fan (club now closed). One night I wish a camera was there it was so funny. She literally tossed into my lap a new dancer telling her she had to get a dance from me even though I never tip.

I have no interested in quacking at naked bodies on stage - seen zillions and been to many nude resorts and workshops so staring at a body to me is boring unless it creative artist dancing which is rare at least in U.S. strip clubs. I don't even drink except for diet cokes or Pepsi at clubs - I just don't like the taste of drinks or beer, not even wine (wish I did, nothing wrong with a few and wine can be good for you). I have no interest in the thrill of a feel etc.

The only thing I enjoy at strip clubs and often get such great response from is what I call "caring intimacy for the moment". I love to nicely caress (not grope) bodies and especially breasts (prefer smaller not DD's ) and the pec muscles. I do neck and back massage on a dancer but mostly just as an opening. But often dancers stay with me a long time "off the clock" to have me continue massaging especially tight necks and backs).

I've been professional trained in Esalen massage (what the heck is that? I describe at http://www.sexwork.com/subcontents/esale…) I've taught intimacy (different types) for swing couples and led for many years the libchrist.com Phoenix couples group with 350 folks and been a speaker at national lifestyle conventions (swinging).

My "turn on" isn't the usual groping and grabbing but caring touch with a dancers body. And the response I often get is amazing.

I "preach" this not to brag but to encourage men to perhaps explore or get in touch with their more intimate side. Maybe even learn some basic massage techniques. Many women (dancers and escorts in my experience) really appreciate it more than just the usual being sexy and what most men seek at strip clubs.

When Phoenix passed new laws in 1999 which - I was very vocal about, on talk radio, and before the City Council public hearings - basically even a fully clothed hug was illegal since those nasty body parts (breasts) can't touch even clothed because the Christian group that basically wrote the law knows what is best for us. And is still active helping cities draft adult laws that in their sick view women should just be sex objects, no real human contact since this offends their sick ideas of controlling folks like the Taliban.

At that point I dismissed Phoenix for about a decade and many trips to Canada and fell in love with some of the clubs in Toronto (Mississauga actually), Hamilton and the huge clubs of Niagara Falls. It is also nice to be in a country that takes individual rights more seriously and of course as in most of the world in private consenting adult prostitution has always been legal - at least outcall. And the Eastern European dancers stood out as my type with often so much wonderful natural intimacy response vs more generally U.S. women.

Over the last few years I have returned to some of the Phoenix clubs and have had some great experiences like the "good old days" but nothing like the clubs in Canada and am far less active than pre law change of 1999. After the law was passed a local media talked about how undercover cops would spent so many hours at clubs, drinking and watching for the slightest physical contact and dancers had to be in odd positions on chairs so no genital contact of bodies. Clubs were fined or shut down for 2 weeks for the slightest touch infraction. Lately far less enforcement fortunately.

My view is both some intimacy with real humans at strip clubs as well as safe sexuality with sex workers (of course only in Canada or the rest of the world where legal) is very positive for a society, can relieve overall stress, as well as sexual stress. Studies have shown the more "in touch" a culture is the less violent it is. But with so many afraid of physical touch we are controlled by silly laws and of course have a overall violent culture where blood and guts on TV or such silly sports as boxing, beating up people is glorified vs caring quality touch intimacy and sexuality that heaven forbid children (or teenagers) are allowed to see.
avatar for EarlTee
EarlTee
13 years ago
> Finally always treat the dancers like a couteous
> gentleman should.

That rule is generating agreement, but I'm not sure I understand.

If a woman I've never met walks up to me, sits in my lap, and starts fondling my dick, what is the courteous and gentlemanly response? I feel that I'm pretty respectful to dancers, but sometimes I say things like, "I'm looking for a $100 hand job -- you interested?" Doesn't seem very courteous or gentlemanly, but often I get what I want, she gets what she wants... is there something wrong with that? It's a strip club, for crying out loud.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
13 years ago
Asking for a hand or blowjob doesn't, all by itself, indicate your level of gentlemanliness. How you deal with her rejection might, though. :)
avatar for kumasdaisy
kumasdaisy
13 years ago
Rule 7 - Yes, just yes. As far as inexpensive gifts, Jimmy John's #6 sandwich with no cucumber and extra mayo will suffice if anyone's planning on visiting Kuma's soon. :p

Seriously though, good post. Some customers do know their etiquette. :)
avatar for kumasdaisy
kumasdaisy
13 years ago
Also, georgmicrodong - hit the nail on the head. "WHYYYY NOOOOOT WAHHH," for instance, is not a gentlemanly response to rejection.
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