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12 years ago
The OP is my kind of customer! One that appreciates my wacky outfits (this past weekend I rocked a corset with a tutu with light up shoes - yes, seriously) and my stage show. (I'm always baffled by why customers seem so unimpressed when I'm upside down, doing a split. It took me a YEAR to get to that level of pole dance skill! Hell, I'm probably the only girl in the club who can do it!)
I suspect I'm not the right kind of girl for most of the posters on this board, however. I don't do extras in any way, shape or form; I don't allow customers to put their mouth on me; I make the vast majority of my money doing table dances on the floor just because I'd rather not fend off wandering hands in VIP. Oh, and I go home every night to my husband, so of course I reject any suggestion of OTC outright.
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12 years ago
Jesus. Why can't you (the OP) be all my customers? I'd much rather get paid to talk than paid to dance. I'm actually quite well-read. As it is now, when the club gets busy I'm CONSTANTLY on my feet because I have a waiting list of customers who want dances. I'd much rather get paid to chat.
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13 years ago
@snowtime, shadowcat - Almost wish you guys would stop by Oasis and chat with me a bit. No pressure to buy any of my med-low contact dances, of course, but I AM curious to see how I rank on your scale of 1-10.
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13 years ago
@snowtime, shadowcat - I'm actually an Oasis girl! I'm thinking about going to Cheetah, but the main thing keeping me back is that Cheetah doesn't have poles. I know there are extras going on in Oasis, but I have managed to do pretty well without having to. Hell, I even have a regular who takes me into VIP almost every week just because I'm so delightful. I've been thinking of switching to Pink Pony; I heard they have better poles and stage tips seem better there. Have any recommendations about any places I should try? I'm actually relatively new to the area myself. I prefer making my money off stage tips rather than dances, but this is Atlanta after all...
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13 years ago
@snowtime - Which club are you talking about? I'm an Atlanta girl myself.
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13 years ago
@jayman - I don't see how there's any contradiction? While Jess and I have different boundaries, we're also different people. I allow as much contact as I am comfortable with, and that's it. I don't feel pressure to do extras because I am satisfied with the amount of money I make, but I can understand why a dancer may feel pressured to do extras if they are in a financial bind. I don't need to offer extras to make my money, because quite honestly, I'm one of the most attractive women at my club and I make consistent money almost every night. My customers are HAPPY to give me money! I also don't blow my money on stupid shit - not that all dancers do, but it's a common stereotype. I am simply explaining why I, myself, don't do extras, and don't appreciate it when customers assume I do, and that it's just a matter of how much. As I once ranted to a handsy customer in VIP - "I'm too pretty to have to do that shit! AND I TOLD YOU NOT TO TOUCH ME THERE!"
@SometimeVoyager - I've been reading up on the history of stripping and striptease, and I find it pretty interesting how clubs used to be show bars, and slowly contact became more and more accepted, and now, almost mandatory. I love performing and I love being on stage - I take a lot of pride in my stage show, actually! I go to classes for pole dance, even. Like I said, I deliberately set myself apart from the other girls because the kind of clientele I want to attract is NOT the kind of clientele coming in looking for "release", if you know what I mean.
I do wish there were clubs around me that were little/no contact and that dancers could still make money just on stage dances. It's interesting that few people have realized that stripping "wages" haven't grown with inflation. People used to tip a dollar on stage back in the '70s; they still tip a dollar now! These days, I'm lucky to make $50 a night on stage tips, and we all know that ends up going to house fees... any take home money I make, I have to make off of giving table dances and VIP. So I give good dances and I make my money, but I still stick to my own boundaries.
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13 years ago
@jerikson - I don't think you are really understanding me. I don't care about the title of "slut", and honestly, there are many women who would embrace it with pride. I am simply giving my point of view that everyone has different limits, and should be allowed to set them wherever THEY want, within reasonable expectations. By "reasonable expectations" I mean a certain level of courtesy to other dancers. If I'm working at a low contact club and a few girls let customers stick a finger in the kitty, it makes hustling harder for ALL of us because expectations have been raised. I'm really not in this industry to work any harder than necessary for my money! That is why I say, "if you want to do that kind of thing, take it OTC or be an escort."
I am simply saying that I set my own limits, and I would never change them for the sake of money. Otherwise it's just a slippery slope argument. I think nothing of giving a regular a hug when I see him, or kissing a particularly great customer on the cheek when he's leaving. Is that slutty? Maybe to radical Muslims or to you, but by my standards, it's pretty darn tame... I don't think a guy necessarily has to see me naked to want to go rub one out in the bathroom, but I'm pretty clear-eyed that what I do is a form of sex work and the kind of thoughts that accompany that.
My husband knows what I do and he's very comfortable with it. He knows that if he ever became uncomfortable with my job, I would not hesitate to quit -- I'm not long for this job anyway, once I graduate from school. I would argue our marriage is better than most because I listen to unhappy husbands all night long, and I make an effort not to make the same mistakes I often hear about. I respect him, he respects me, and he certainly doesn't call me a "slut" or try to guilt me about it...
@motorhead - I never had trouble understanding microecon on a qualitative level, but I suspect I would not enjoy upper level courses if the math gets very hairy! I managed to get through Calculus 2, but never made it to multivariable. (I didn't think I needed it, though my graduate research does use a lot of ordinary differential equations.) My best friend is a finance/math/business triple major with aspirations of becoming a Wall Street quant, and I certainly don't envy his courseload from what I hear.
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13 years ago
@ motorhead - I don't know how it is for other people, but while I'm totally comfortable with the idea of other people seeing me nude (hell, it's just a human body, like any other you might see in this club or on the internet) I'm not comfortable with sharing something as intimate as sex with someone, especially not for money. I do realize that many other women might say the same about other people seeing them naked, but it's not something that bothers me, so I can see why prostitution wouldn't bother other women. As a feminist, I support the right for each woman to make the choice for themselves. To me, it's actually anti-feminist to denigrate the choices that other women make with the thought that you know better than they do.
I guess I'm kind of a romantic, in a sense... sex is something I'd like to share with my SO and ONLY my SO. That is why I don't do extras, ever. There's no price to be put on it; it just isn't going to happen. There's a famous joke attributed to Winston Churchill:
At a dinner party one night, a drunk Churchill asked an attractive woman whether she would sleep with him for a million pounds. “Maybe,†the woman said coyly. “Would you sleep with me for one pound?†Churchill then asked. “Of course not, what kind of woman do you think I am?†the woman responded indignantly. “Madam, we’ve already established what kind of woman you are,†said Churchill, “now we’re just negotiating the price.â€
Now, while I'm only took a basic course in economics back in undergrad, I set my VIP prices $50 higher than the other girls in the club exactly BECAUSE I know what expectations tend to be in the VIP, and I know very well that I often do not live up to those expectations. I'm taking advantage of the price-elasticity of demand to narrow down my clientele... I'm actually quite upfront with customers on my limits in VIP, and while the other girls at the club tell me I need to market myself better in order to make money, I'm satisfied with the money I make. (That, and the customers who are willing to spend the money on me in VIP tend to be discerning types who appreciate me for more than the ability to give a good grind.)
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13 years ago
Huh. While I don't agree with Jess' somewhat elitist attitude, I agree with her in spirit. Like it or not, dancing is a form of sex work, and it's counterproductive to look down on other women for what they chose to do to earn their money. (Which is not to say that I hate that other girls at my club do extras - if only because it means I have to hustle harder to earn MY money. If you want to do that kind of thing, take it OTC or be an escort. ) I'm a dancer as well, have been dancing for years in some rather high-contact areas. I've always been a clean dancer and while I do allow SOME contact, I don't let myself be groped. I understand I'm providing a service - people come to stripclubs because they are craving some kind of intimacy with a real, live girl, otherwise they'd be staying at home and jerking off in front of the computer. I totally get it.
I give good, sensual dances ... customers often tell me it's the best dance they've ever gotten. I give a bit of a moderate grind, a lot of teasing and eye contact, and maybe a little one-way contact if you are polite. At my club, the rules are that I don't allow customers to touch me at all during table dances. Even in the VIP, my own personal rules are to ask you to keep your hands limited to areas not covered by a bikini. The last customer who tried to grope me between the legs got slapped... just because you're rich enough to take me into VIP doesn't mean that I am willing to sell myself for that price. I've been offered thousands of dollars for sex - and never have I even been tempted to say yes.
For what it's worth, I'm graduate student in a hard science field and I am dancing to save up a little money. I'm also happily married. My husband and I live frugally and I make pretty decent money because I'm a good conversationalist, put a lot of effort into my stage show, and attractive enough to sell dances without having to be pushy. I don't intend on dancing forever, but I certainly believe in making hay while the sun shines... might as well make money off my looks while I still have them, right?